> Subject: Why did the chicken cross the road? > > > > GEORGE W BUSH > > We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to >know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is >either against us or for us. There is no middle ground here. > > > COLIN POWELL > > Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image >of the chicken crossing the road. > > > HANS BLIX > > We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been >allowed to have access to the other side of the road. > > > JOHN KERRY > > Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road I am now against it! > > > RALPH NADER > > The chicken's habitat on the other side of the road had been polluted by >unchecked industrial greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat >on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a >gas-guzzling SUV. > > > PAT BUCHANAN > > To steal the job of a decent, hard-working American. > > > RUSH LIMBAUGH > > I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was >getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet that somebody >out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with >crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can >real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax >dollars. And when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money >the government took from you to build a road for chickens to cross. > > > MARTHA STEWART > > No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a >standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price >dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information > > > JERRY FALWELL > > Because the chicken was gay --- isn't it obvious? Can't you people see >the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other >side." That's what they call it the other side. Yes, my friends, that >chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say >we Boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal >media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side." > > > DR SEUSS > > Did the chicken cross the road? > > > Did he cross it with a toad? > > > Yes, the chicken crossed the road, > > > but why it crossed I've not been told > > > > ERNEST HEMINGWAY > > To die in the rain. Alone. > > > MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR > > I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads >without having their motives called into question. > > > GRANDPA > > In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told >us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough. > > > BARBARA WALTERS > > Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the >chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how it >experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its ife >long dream of crossing the road. > > > JOHN LENNON > > Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together - in >peace. > > > ARISTOTLE > > It is the nature of chickens to cross the road. > > > KARL MARX > > It was an historic inevitability. > > > RONALD REAGAN > > What chicken? > > > CAPTAIN KIRK > > To boldly go where no chicken has ever gone before. > > > SIGMUND FREUD > > The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road >reveals your underlying sexual insecurity. > > > BILL GATES > > I have just witnessed eChicken2003, which will not only cross roads, but >will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook >and Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken. > > > ALBERT EINSTEIN > > Did the chicken really cross the ! road, or did the road move beneath >the chicken? > > > BILL CLINTON > > I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of >chicken? > > > AL GORE > > I invented the chicken! > > > THE BIBLE > > And God came down from heaven, and he said unto the chicken THOU SHALT >CROSS THE ROAD. And the chicken didst cross the road, and there was much >rejoicing. > > > COLONEL SANDERS > > Did I miss one?
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