May have seen this one before..
From: D. D.
It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties now and
then --
just to loosen up.
Inevitably, though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more
than just a
social thinker. I began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself --
but I
knew it wasn't true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and
finally
I was thinking all the time. That was when things began to sour at
home. One
evening I turned off theTV and asked my wife about the meaning of life.
She
spent that night at her mother's. I began to think on the job. I knew
that
thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't help myself. I began
to avoid
friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau, Muir, Confucius and
Kafka. I
would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it
exactly we
are doing here?" One day the boss called me in. He said, "Listen, I
like you,
and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real
problem. If
you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job."
This gave
me a lot to think about. I came home early after my conversation with
the boss.
"Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking..." "I know you've been
thinking," she
said, "and I want a divorce!" "But Honey, surely it's not that
serious." "It is
serious," she said, lower lip aquiver. "You think as much as college
professors
and college professors don't make any money, so if you keep on
thinking, we
won't have any money!" "That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently.
She
exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal
with
the emotional drama. "I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped
out the
door. I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche. I
roared into
the parking lot with NPR on the radio and ran up to the big glass
doors. They
didn't open. The library was closed. To this day, I believe that a
Higher Power
was looking out for me that night. As I was leaning on the unfeeling
glass,
whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye, "Friend, is heavy
thinking
ruining your life?" it asked. You probably recognize that line. It
comes from the
standard Thinkers Anonymous poster. This is why I am what I am today: a
recovering thinker. I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch
a
non-educational video; last week it was "Porky's." Then we share
experiences
about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting. I still have my
job, and
things are a lot better at home. Life just seemed easier, somehow, as
soon as I
stopped thinking. I think the road to recovery is nearly complete for
me. Today
I took the final step...I joined the Republican Party.
--
Tamara P Duvall http://t-n-lace.net/
Lexington, Virginia, USA (Formerly of Warsaw, Poland)
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