Dear Jane, thanks for your kind comment. Much appreciated. I'm going to test my non-trimming reputation and say, Hear! Hear! to your comments below. Well said. Worth repeating. My comments have occasionally been taken in a way I would never mean to do, when feeling puckish, much to my distress. I am not, however, all sweetness and light, just ask my children. When I really disagree, or have been put off by a comment, it is then time to respond as politely as possible, but privately. If you can't say something nice, say it privately, to bend a phrase. Ooo ooo, questionable jokes, where do I join.... Chaucer is my favorite poet.
One must also remember that many of us carry baggage, which on the internet especially cannot be seen. Some of us have sore spots which haven't healed well, and when they are touched, it is remembered for a long time. I am sure that no one intentionally steps on sore toes, but sometimes we need to remember that they might be there. Read your posts before sending. And we also need to remember, if at all possible, that just because that sore spot is touched, it wasn't necessarily intentional. If it was, then just consider the source. I erased 3 comments from this spot. lrb > >To the lurkers.... >It does seem that those of us who post are those who have been on the >list for quite a while, and thus feel comfortable in doing so and making >the occasional error! There have been times in the past, particularly >at the busy family times of year (October half term, coinciding with >Thanksgiving in the US, seems to be one of those) when occasionally >tempers have run short and people have, possibly not meaning to, snapped >at others in replies to messages. > >Those who have been on the list for years, and in particular the Chat >list, will remember that Tamara donned her "flame-proof undies" to >filter the jokes that were just a little too risqué - we have to >remember that lacemakers have children who occasionally read over >shoulders :-). > >The biggest problem on any list is that no-one can see the big grin >written across your face as you make a witty response, and in plain text >it can come across as anything but witty. > >However, where the lace list is concerned, please don't assume that if >we post something that you don't agree with, that your opinion isn't >valid - or that you have nothing to contribute, sometimes expressing >things in slightly different words can help the penny to drop for >someone who doesn't understand a point; a different way of working a >stitch, which gives the same results, may be easier for some to grasp >than the way the rest of us were taught - your contribution is valid and >welcome. > >Quite simply, if you don't agree with someone and feel strongly enough >to respond, do so gently, explaining why you don't agree; if you find >that a post has helped you, then post and say thank you - this feedback >can be of great help even to those who have been teaching for years. >When you don't know someone personally it is sometimes difficult to know >if they are new to lace or have been teaching it for centuries, but as >one of my students once put it, there is always something new to learn >in lace, and that applies as much to us "old hands" as it does to the >newest lacemakers. > >If we all treat each other with the respect we expect to receive, then >there is no reason for anyone to be afraid of posting. > "My email sends out an automatic message. Arachne members, please ignore it. I read your emails." - To unsubscribe send email to majord...@arachne.com containing the line: unsubscribe lace y...@address.here. For help, write to arachne.modera...@gmail.com. Photo site: http://www.flickr.com/photos/lacemaker/sets/
