(Per the current SRFI, you first need to try to write an object, and if that fails, you get back an exception satisfying "unwritable-error?")

Sorry, that's a misleading claim on my part. The SRFI says:

(unwritable-error? object) => boolean

Possible causes for the error include the following.

* The port's syntax cannot encode any unreadable data at all.
* The implementation does not know how to encode a stand-in for this particular 
object.
* The programmer has set an implementation-defined flag saying that trying to 
write unreadable data to the port should raise an error.

But the SRFI does not provide a way to set the flag in question.

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