Hi!

In my school, if kids were in this position, they would already have had
several conversations with the Dean of Students and we would be at the
stage of having had them call their parents, sign a contract agreeing to
eliminate certain behaviors and promote others in their place, or possibly
attend a disciplinary hearing co-led by the Dean of Students and the
President of the Student Council (this might lead eventually to suspension
or even expulsion, the seriousness and the frequency of the thefts
determining how strong our response is).

At my wife's school, which granted is a high school (my school is grades
7-12), they would be expelled on the first offense. They have a strong
honor code which they take very seriously, and it makes for an atmosphere
of such trust that if you were to tack a $20 bill up on the bulletin board
for your friend to pick up, no one else would touch it (this is a
true-to-life story).

In this case, I would suggest confronting the student about the
discrepancies between her story and what is apparently the reality, affirm
that this behavior violates trust and is completely unacceptable, ask her
to think about how the other kids feel in general about having their stuff
taken and how they might feel in particular about her, and then ask to
think how she can rebuild the trust she's undermined. I would ask her to
call her parents to go over the plan with them, and make it clear what the
consequence will be if she doesn't execute the plan.

Take care,
Bill Ivey
Stoneleigh-Burnham School



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