OK, I've done some research, and have figured some things out.  From what I
can tell, I am not getting messages in my inbox that I have already deleted.

 
First, I went to gmail's instructions for setting up an account on the
IPhone.  It told me to go to "add account", which I did.  Because I always
read the instructions as a last result, I clicked on the gmail icon and
entered my gmail account info.  I went back to the instructions to see what
I needed to do next and found out that it instructed me not to click on the
gmail setup icon because e-mails would be handled differently if I did.  As
it turns out after reading further, e-mail works exactly as we want if you
use the automatic setup for gmail.  I tested this by sending myself an
e-mail to my gmail account.  I saw it in my Outlook gmail inbox as well as
on my IPhone.  I deleted the e-mail from my IPhone then looked at my Outlook
account.  What I found was that the e-mail went to the trash folder, which
will not reload in your inbox.  Those e-mails will stay in the trash for 30
days, at which time they will delete.  I'm thinking that maybe some people
actually followed the setup instructions and clicked on "other" instead of
the automatic gmail setup.  If that is the case, I would delete the account
and start over.  If this is not what happened, then I'm at a loss because
mine is working exactly as I want.
 
Hope this helps.
 
Kim
 

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