Hope this doesn't offend anyone. I
just thought it was funny being the techie I am.
Troy Bell
Dear Tech Support:
Last year I
upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slow
down in
the performance of the flower and jewelry applications that had
operated flawlessly under the Boyfriend 5.0 system. In addition, Husband
1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9,
but
installed undesirable programs such as NFL 7.4, NBA 3.2 and NHL
4.1.
Conversation 8.0 also no longer runs and Housecleaning 2.6
simply crashes
the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix
these problems, but to
no avail. What can I do?
Signed, Desperate
Dear Desperate:
First, keep in mind
that Boyfriend 5.0 was an entertainment package, while
Husband 1.0 is an
operating system. Try to enter the command C:/I THOUGHT
YOU LOVED ME and
install Tears 6.2. Husband 1.0 should then automatically
run the
applications: Guilt 3.3 and Flowers 7.5. But remember, overuse can
cause
Husband 1.0 to default to such background applications as Grumpy
Silence
2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Please remember that Beer 6.1 is
a very
bad program that will create SnoringLoudly.WAV files. DO NOT install
Mother-In-Law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not
supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0. It could also
potentially cause Husband 1.0 to default to the program: Girlfriend 9.2,
which runs in the background and has been known to introduce potentially
serious viruses into the Operating System.
In summary.........,
Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a
limited memory and can't
learn new applications quickly. You might consider
buying additional
software to enhance his system performance. I personally
recommend Hot Food
3.0 and Single Malt Scotch 4.5 combined with such
applications as Boob Job
3.6D and that old standby Lingerie 6.x (which have
both been credited with
improved performance of his hardware).
Good Luck,
Tech
Support
