Thank yo, Don. I especially liked where you said: "As to whether he should be treated gently, charitably, and with "forbearance and tolerance," good luck with that approach." An organization is OBLIGATED, in my opinion, to protect the community consistant with due process and the civil rights of the individual offender. Even as efforts to 'rehabilitate' are attempted. The CDU & QCC strived to do that. Again, thanks, Don, for weighing in! merry Merry Kay Shernock 381 VT Rte 12 NO Northfield, VT 05663 (802)595-3972 On Sunday, April 27, 2014 9:22 PM, Don Peabody <[email protected]> wrote: Tim, et al.--
This is the same dancer, Tim, as Orin confirmed in an earlier email. (Or there's a heck of a coincidence on name.) Before I said anymore, I wanted to confirm, with another member of Queen City Contras (Burlington, Vermont,) my recollections of what happened up here. I've now done that, and it very much it mirrors what Tim describes happening in Montpelier (and, indeed, Montpelier's CDU and the QCC were in contact, if not precisely coordinating efforts, on the matter during that time.) J. was notified by telephone of complaints by the President of QCC; he was invited to meet, should he wish to dance with us again, with a two-person delegation of our committee to discuss the complaints and our expectations for future behavior and conflict resolution. He "made nice" on the telephone, never showed up at another of our dances, but did show up--with a partner--at another, non-QCC, dance in Burlington. As to whether he should be treated gently, charitably, and with "forbearance and tolerance," good luck with that approach. From Orin's description, J's found no persuasive reason to reform his behavior despite multiple confrontations concerning same. As Tim said for himself: I am also speaking only for myself. Don Peabody On Apr 27, 2014, at 8:34 PM, Timothy Swartz wrote: > Orin-- > Our contra dance dealt with a very similar situation a few years ago. I > am concerned that this may be the same person, in fact. But regardless of > the person involved, it is important to deal with the problems, as this may > have a very severe impact on the dance community, of course as well as the > individuals involved. > Our volunteer dance-organizing committee had many meetings after we started > getting complaints about the problems created by the individual dancer. > Our basic instincts are to keep our dance open to all, and to allow for > individual differences. However, we also have to recognize that we are a > public institution, and that we are responsible for *all* the dancers. We > can't guarantee that all will have a good time, but we have a > responsibility to keep the behavior of a single person from hurting the > experience of others. > In our experience, the same set of behaviors was repeated: he preyed on > young women, often new-comers to the dance, and his leering and dominating > behavior was so unpleasant that some stopped coming to dances. Thanks to > some who did come and complain to us, as members of the Contra Dance > Umbrella (CDU) organizing community, we finally took some action. This > started with a couple of us talking directly to the problem dancer, and > though we got some level of verbal agreement from him, that he would pay > attention to what the women with whom he was dancing had rights to not be > agressively twirled, and so on. However, none of this made a difference > over the long term. > After we started talking about this among the CDU, some of us wanted to try > to talk further to him, and had phone and in-person conversations. None of > these seemed to have any impact. More importantly, in the long run, it > forced our committee to come up with a policy to deal with "inappropriate > behavior" which I'm attaching to this email. This was largely based on a > policy we found on-line from the Princeton NJ Country Dancers; we do not > claim to be inventing this from whole cloth. > The essence of our policy is that we decided we had to base it on > complaints from others, not from a "set of rules" that we would try to > enforce. We felt it was not possible to define "inappropriate behavior", > even though we all felt we could identify it. Our response is therefore > triggered by complaints, as you will see. It gives some measure of "due > process" to the situation, because of our commitment to fairness, and > wanting to avoid the risk of a false accusation. But it also takes > seriously the *feeling* of discomfort and invasion of personal space that > has such an impact on dancers subjected to inappropriate behavior, and it > spells out some concrete steps we will take after receiving a complaint. > The privacy of the complainant is protected, as is the identity of the > accused person. The policy calls for escalating sanctions if the behavior > continues, up to banning the dancer from the dance. We consulted with our > local (rural) police department during this process, and confirmed that we > do have the right to ask someone to leave, if their behavior is > inappropriate, and to call the police department to remove the person as a > trespasser if the request is not honored. This is not something we want to > have to do! But it is helpful to know that we are on firm legal ground if > we need to call in the troops. > The need to rely on a complaint remains a weakness of this approach, as it > requires someone who is traumatized to come forward. The corollary is that > it is important for committee members to be identifiable, and to make > efforts to publicize the fact that we will take action if someone feels > uncomfortable, to encourage people to come forward. We have made some > serious strides, including wearing buttons at dances which identify us, and > posting pictures of the CDU in the Grange Hall where our dances are held. > Some of us have further ideas, including posting notices in the restrooms > about the recourse available in case of problems. There may be more things > we can and should do. > > This experience was still fresh in our minds when the "Puttin' on the > Dance" organizers' conference was held in the fall of 2011, put on by the > CDSS. At that conference, one of the workshops was about just this > problem, led by Chris Weiler. At that workshop, 3 of us from the CDU gave > out copies of this policy, and took part in a long discussion about the > various issues involved--the civil rights of people accused of > "inappropriate behavior" and also the rights of people to come and dance > and feel safe. In the end, I felt quite comfortable with the policy as we > formulated it--with the concerns noted above about having to wait for > complaints. I don't feel we have the perfect answer--but it is > considerably better than having no answer at all, as we did before we were > confronted with the problem dancer. We heard at least a few stories of the > dances which were largely destroyed by the discomfort invoked by a single > problem dancer. We know we are not the only dance community which has had > to deal with this sort of problem, and that the individual with whom we > were dealing is not the only one. We've talked since with many callers > who know many more stories about the problems which can be caused by an > individual, more obvious sometimes from their vantage point than from the > dance floor. > I found the sense of solidarity which I got from talking with other > organizers at the conference an enormous help, as well as the endorsement > of our policy by many of those we spoke with. I encourage others to take > advantage of opportunities like that, and of the interactions available on > this forum, which I found out about as a result of that conference. > > The end of the story of our interactions with our particular problem came > when we sent a formal letter, via registered mail to the person involved, > stating that he would be banned if another complaint was received and > substantiated. We sent this from a PO box rented for the purpose, where > the receipt which proved that he got it was received. We have not had the > person show up since. I'm sorry if he has surfaced elsewhere, though I > can't say I'm surprised. Good for you for taking this issue > seriously--it is not easy, but it is necessary. For our committee, it was > a growth experience, making us take our responsibility to heart. Best > wishes to all! > > Tim Swartz > (note--these are my individual thoughts, not an official response from the > CDU) > <09-12-16 CDU policy on inappropriate > behavior.doc>_______________________________________________ > Organizers mailing list > [email protected] > http://www.sharedweight.net/mailman/listinfo/organizers _______________________________________________ Organizers mailing list [email protected] http://www.sharedweight.net/mailman/listinfo/organizers
