1) You wake up from a nightmare where all your computers had Windows installed instead of Linux, and all your systems have blue-screened on you,
2) You wake up with the phone in your hand and your STILL on hold with Microsoft support, and it's the Christmas holidays,
3) You receive a Microsoft Audit CD in the mail, but you've never used anything but Linux,
4) Microsoft releases MS Linux which has NO security, crashes often, has a whack of bugs in it which you can't fix, includes an optional BSOD splashscreen, and patents all the source code for it,
5) PHP and Perl turn out to be HTML and Visual Basic in disguise and you just bought every book on the subject,
6) Microsoft patents the GPL,
7) You receive SPAM emails with Bill Gates and Steve Ballmer 'dressed-in-drag' pictures attached and they're so horrible that they cause permanent brain trauma!
8) All your Linux and Open-Source T-Shirts get stolen and you haven't a thing to wear!
Feel free to add to the list. Maybe the one thing we really should add to the Mandrake Twiki is a humour section? Let the games begin!
-- Mr. Geek Registered Linux User #190712
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