Hi Rob,

Thank again for your deep review. Please find our response inline for the open 
points.

Best regards,
Bo


发件人: Rob Wilton (rwilton) [mailto:rwil...@cisco.com]
发送时间: 2022年9月13日 17:24
收件人: Wubo (lana) <lana.w...@huawei.com>; 
draft-ietf-opsawg-yang-vpn-service-pm....@ietf.org
抄送: opsawg@ietf.org
主题: RE: AD review of draft-ietf-opsawg-yang-vpn-service-pm-09

Hi Bo,

Thanks.  I’ve made some further comments for a few points inline.  I’ve snipped 
those that we already have agreement on.


From: Wubo (lana) <lana.w...@huawei.com<mailto:lana.w...@huawei.com>>
Sent: 13 September 2022 07:38
To: Rob Wilton (rwilton) <rwil...@cisco.com<mailto:rwil...@cisco.com>>; 
draft-ietf-opsawg-yang-vpn-service-pm....@ietf.org<mailto:draft-ietf-opsawg-yang-vpn-service-pm....@ietf.org>
Cc: opsawg@ietf.org<mailto:opsawg@ietf.org>
Subject: 答复: AD review of draft-ietf-opsawg-yang-vpn-service-pm-09


Hi Rob,



Many thanks for your thoughtful review. Please see inline.



Thanks,



Bo



-----邮件原件-----
发件人: Rob Wilton (rwilton) [mailto:rwil...@cisco.com]
发送时间: 2022年9月9日 18:43
收件人: 
draft-ietf-opsawg-yang-vpn-service-pm....@ietf.org<mailto:draft-ietf-opsawg-yang-vpn-service-pm....@ietf.org>
抄送: opsawg@ietf.org<mailto:opsawg@ietf.org>
主题: AD review of draft-ietf-opsawg-yang-vpn-service-pm-09



Hi,



Here are my AD review comments for draft-ietf-opsawg-yang-vpn-service-pm-09, 
apologies for the delay.



I think that this document is in good shape and hence most of my comments are 
only minor or nits.





Minor level comments:



(1) p 0, sec



   The data model for network topologies defined in RFC 8345 introduces

   vertical layering relationships between networks that can be

   augmented to cover network and service topologies.  This document

   defines a YANG module for performance monitoring (PM) of both

  networks and VPN services that can be used to monitor and manage

   network performance on the topology at higher layer or the service

   topology between VPN sites.



"the topology at higher layer" doesn't scan particularly well to me, please can 
you tweak it.



Bo: Thanks for pointing this out. Is this better that we simply change to “the 
underlay topology”?



Yes, perhaps something like this:



NEW:

   The data model for network topologies defined in RFC 8345 introduces

   vertical layering relationships between networks that can be

   augmented to cover network and service topologies.  This document

   defines a YANG module for performance monitoring (PM) of both

   underlay networks and overlay VPN services that can be used to monitor

  and manage network performance on the topology of both layers.


Bo 2: Thanks for the good suggestion. We will update as you suggested.



(3) p 4, sec 3.  Network and VPN Service Performance Monitoring Model Usage



   As shown in Figure 1, in the context of the layering model

   architecture described in [RFC8309], the network and VPN service

   performance monitoring (PM) model can be used to expose a set of

   performance information to the above layer.  Such information can be

   used by an orchestrator to subscribe to performance data.



Perhaps rephase?  I.e., is it the performance data that is being used to create 
a subscription based on the performance data, or is it just that the model 
makes the performance data readily available, which can then be subscribed do?



Bo: Thanks for the suggestion. How about:

The model makes the performance data readily available, which can then be 
subscribed by the client application, such as an orchestrator.



I think that you can probably get away with deleting the last 2 sentences of 
that paragraph and rewording it slightly.  The document already talks more 
about the specifics in sections 3.1 and 3.2 anyway.  Hence, I propose:



OLD:



   As shown in Figure 1, in the context of the layering model

   architecture described in [RFC8309], the network and VPN service

   performance monitoring (PM) model can be used to expose a set of

   performance information to the above layer.  Such information can be

   used by an orchestrator to subscribe to performance data.  The

   network controller will then notify the orchestrator about

   corresponding parameter changes.



NEW:



As shown in Figure 1, in the context of the layering model

architecture described in [RFC8309], the network and VPN service

performance monitoring (PM) model can be used to expose operational

performance information to the layer above, e.g., to an orchestrator

or other client application, via standard network management APIs.


Bo 2: Thanks for the suggestion. The text looks good.





(6) p 5, sec 3.1.  Collecting Data via Pub/Sub Mechanism



  A periodic notification

   [RFC8641] can be specified to obtain real-time performance data, a

   replay notification defined in [RFC5277] or [RFC8639] can be

   specified to obtain historical data



If this data is coming from a device then ideally it would not hold on to much 
historical data.

Bo: Is it better that we change to “can be specified to obtain historical data 
in a limited period of time.”? E.g. in some implementation, a controller can 
store PM data for a year?



Okay.  Perhaps something like:



A periodic notification [RFC8641] can be specified to obtain real-time 
performance data.

For devices/controllers that maintain historical performance data for a period 
of time, a replay

notification [RFC5277] or [RFC8639] can be used to obtain the historical data,


Bo 2: Thanks for the suggestion. The text looks good.



(7) p 6, sec 4.1.  Layering Relationship between Multiple Layers of Topology



      Figure 3: Example of Topology Mapping Between VPN Service

                   Topology and Underlying Network



Note, I don't find this diagram brilliantly clear, it is hard to see when the 
dotted lines go but the explanatory text is clear (and probably sufficient).



Bo: Thanks. We can remove the lines if it doesn't help.



I’m ambivalent on this one, and hence I’m happy to leave it to the authors 
discretion.  You could leave them in and see if you get similar comments during 
the IETF LC or IESG reviews.


Bo 2: Thanks. We will keep them in then.





(8) p 7, sec 4.1.  Layering Relationship between Multiple Layers of Topology



   Apart from the association between the VPN topology and the underlay

   topology, VPN Network PM can also provide the performance status of

   the underlay network and VPN services.  For example, network PM can

   provide link PM statistics and port statistics.  VPN PM can provide

   statistics on VPN access interfaces, the number of current VRF routes

   or L2VPN MAC entry of VPN nodes, and performance statistics on the

   logical point-to-point link between source and destination VPN nodes

   or between source and destination VPN access interfaces.  Figure 4

   illustrates an example of VPN PM and the difference between two VPN

   PM measurement methods.  One is the VPN tunnel PM and the other is

   inter-VPN-access interface PM.



By "VPN Network PM", do you mean the "VPN Network PM YANG module", or is this 
just referring to performance monitoring in general?



Bo: "VPN Network PM" mean "VPN Network PM YANG module". How about we rephrase:



Apart from the association between the VPN topology and the underlay

   topology, VPN Network PM YANG module can also provide the performance status 
of

   the underlay network and VPN services.  For example, network PM the module 
can

   provide link PM statistics and port statistics of a underlay network.  And 
it can also provide

   VPN PM statistics, which can be further split into PM for the VPN tunnel and 
PM at the VPN PE access node, as illustrated in the following diagram.

such as statistics on VPN access interfaces, the number of current VRF routes

   or L2VPN MAC entry of VPN nodes, and performance statistics on the

   logical point-to-point link between source and destination VPN nodes

   or between source and destination VPN access interfaces.  Figure 4

   illustrates an example of the module VPN PM and shows the difference between 
two VPN

   PM measurement methods.  One is including the VPN tunnel PM and the other is

   inter-VPN-access interface PM. // The newly added text are blue.



Figure 4 illustrates an example of VPN PM and two VPN PM measurement methods 
including the VPN tunnel PM and the inter-VPN-access interface PM. VPN PM can 
also provide

   statistics on VPN access interfaces, the number of current VRF routes or 
L2VPN MAC entry of VPN node





Yes, I think that this is clearer.  One nit: “a underlay” => “an underlay”.


Bo 2: Thanks for catching this. We will correct this.





(11) p 8, sec 4.2.  Network Level



   For network performance monitoring, the container of "networks" in

   [RFC8345] is not extended.



I'm confused by what this sentence is meant to convey - did you mean augmented? 
 In particular, it isn't clear to me how you express PM for the physical (or 
underlay networks).  Is what you are trying to express that the "service-type" 
container is present for VPN service performance monitoring and absence 
otherwise?  Probably more words required here, and in the YANG module.



Bo: Thanks for pointing this out. Your understanding is exactly what we're 
trying to convey. How about we change to



As VPN Network PM YANG module includes two types of PM augmentation, the 
underlay networks PM is augmented on [RFC8345] when the "service-type" presence 
container is not defined

, and the VPN PM is augmented on [RFC8345] when the "service-type" presence 
container is defined.



For the underlay network performance monitoring, the container of "networks" in

   [RFC8345] is not augmented.



I think that I would still find that slightly confusing.  Perhaps:



NEW:



4.2.  Network Level



The model can be used for performance monitoring both for the network and the 
VPN services.



When the “service-type” presence container is absent, then it indicates

performance monitoring of the network itself.



When the “service-type” presence container is present, then it indicates

performance monitoring of the VPN service specified by the “service-type”

leaf, e.g. , L3VPN or Virtual Private LAN Service (VPLS).  The values are taken

from [RFC9181].  When a network topology instance contains the L3VPN or

other L2VPN network type, it represents a VPN instance that can perform

performance monitoring.


Bo 2: Thanks for the good suggestion. The text looks good.



One extra question:



Does this model allow you to gather PM data from both the network and L2VPN 
services at the same time?  If so, is there, or should there be, any text is 
the document that describes how to do this?


Bo2: In the current model design, the underlay network and L2VPN are separate 
network instances and the PM data cannot be gathered at the same time.
How about we make such changes:

==

4.2.  Network Level



The model can be used for performance monitoring both for the network and the 
VPN services. However, the module does not allow to gather the performance 
monitoring data simultaneously for both cases. Concretely:

* When the “service-type” presence container is absent, then it indicates

performance monitoring of the network itself.



* When the “service-type” presence container is present, then it indicates

performance monitoring of the VPN service specified by the “service-type”

leaf, e.g. , L3VPN or Virtual Private LAN Service (VPLS).  The values are taken

from [RFC9181].  When a network topology instance contains the L3VPN or

other L2VPN network type, it represents a VPN instance that can perform

performance monitoring.

==



(15) p 10, sec 4.4.  Link and Termination Point Level



  The performance data of a link is a collection of counters and gauges

   that report the performance status.

  augment /nw:networks/nw:network/nt:link:

    +--rw pm-attributes

       +--rw low-percentile?            percentile

       +--rw intermediate-percentile?   percentile

       +--rw high-percentile?           percentile

       +--rw measurement-interval?      uint32

       +--ro pm* [pm-type]

       |  +--ro pm-type          identityref

       |  +--ro pm-attributes

       |     +--ro start-time?                        yang:date-and-time

       |     +--ro end-time?                          yang:date-and-time

       |     +--ro pm-source?                         identityref

       |     +--ro one-way-pm-statistics

       |     |  +--ro loss-statistics

       |     |  |  +--ro packet-loss-count?   yang:counter64

       |     |  |  +--ro loss-ratio?          percentage

       |     |  +--ro delay-statistics

       |     |  |  +--ro unit-value?                      identityref

       |     |  |  +--ro min-delay-value?                 yang:gauge64

       |     |  |  +--ro max-delay-value?                 yang:gauge64

       |     |  |  +--ro low-delay-percentile?            yang:gauge64

       |     |  |  +--ro intermediate-delay-percentile?   yang:gauge64

       |     |  |  +--ro high-delay-percentile?           yang:gauge64

       |     |  +--ro jitter-statistics

       |     |     +--ro unit-value?                       identityref

       |     |     +--ro min-jitter-value?                 yang:gauge64

       |     |     +--ro max-jitter-value?                 yang:gauge64

       |     |     +--ro low-jitter-percentile?            yang:gauge64

       |     |     +--ro intermediate-jitter-percentile?   yang:gauge64

       |     |     +--ro high-jitter-percentile?           yang:gauge64



I presume that it is intentional delay and jitter statistics can have different 
units, rather than always being aligned to the same units?



Bo: Agree. Will change the jitter to gauge32.



I think that my previous comment wasn’t clear enough, yang:guage64 might be 
okay.  My question was more about whether it is correct to have separate 
“unit-value” identityref values for delay-statistics independently from 
jitter-statistics?  I’m not saying that this is necessary wrong, but I just 
wanted to ensure that the authors had proactively thought about this and had 
consciously decided that it makes sense for delay values to be use different 
units from jitter values.


Bo2: Thanks for the question. On the “unit-value”, the authors agree that the 
same “unit-value” is sufficient for most cases. Though considering to meet the 
precision requirements of some scenarios, e.g. 5G cases, we think this may be 
useful. As such, current YANG model defines default “unit-value” as 
"lime:milliseconds" for both delay and jitter values.

And for the yang:guage64 for jitter, we think we still need to keep it as is 
after more thought.





(18) p 24, sec 5.  Network and VPN Service Performance Monitoring YANG Module



     augment "/nw:networks/nw:network/nw:network-types" {

       description

         "Defines the service topologies types.";

       container service-type {

         presence "Indicates network service topology.";



Perhaps expand either in the presence statement, or the documentation what it 
means if this container isn't present.  I.e., does this mean that the topology 
represents the underlying network?



Bo: Thanks the suggestion. How about the change:

“VPN PM is indicated through this presence containers. When the container is 
not present, the topology represents the underlying network.”



Perhaps just:

“Presence of the container indicates a service topology, absence of the 
container indicates an underlay network.”


Bo2: Thanks for the suggestion. We will update as this.




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