Well, Julie -- I guess, for me, staying out of the way does not mean not being involved. I can drop my agenda and still be happy, mad, sad, etc. in the moment -- even more authentically!
Judi www.ponoconsultants.com <http://www.ponoconsultants.com> www.emergentfeminine.com <http://www.emergentfeminine.com> (902) 434-6695 fax (902) 435-1085 Reap the Rewards! -----Original Message----- From: OSLIST [mailto:osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu]On Behalf Of Julie Smith Sent: Tuesday, September 23, 2003 4:56 PM To: osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu Subject: Re: Attachment and Detachment Thanks, Judi, for the conversation and kindnesses. Your comments helped me link some things I hadn't put together before. You said "No attachment to outcome to me is similar to inviting those in the opening of space to (as Gerard put it) honor the group by getting out of the way." This gets at the core of what I've been trying to talk about. I'm not convinced it always honors the group to stay out of the way. I'm willing to take that concept as a worthy and valuable starting assumption, but I think we also need to be open to the possibility that sometimes more active involvement is better than staying out of the way. My recent experience with youth is an example of a time when I didn't feel comfortable staying completely out of the way. Part of me wonders whether it is this focus on invisibility, on staying out of the way, that creates a need for the concept of space invaders. Maybe we created space invaders to give us a way to understand and cope with situations that defy our normal expectations about OST. When staying out of the way doesn't work, why doesn't it? Is it because of what the "space invader" is doing or is it because of what we're not doing? Might the space invader be inviting us to engage in a different way? Are we choosing to blame the "space invader" for our discomfort when another alternative might be to expand our view of what is possible within the OST process? If we define our role as always staying out of the way, then we have no way of thinking about what we might do when a person or situation calls for our engagement. Can we consider the possibility that our best, most loving response might be a visible, engaged response, even when we're wearing our OST facilitator hat? Should we give ourselves permission to explore what an engaged response might look like from an OST facilitator? Are there ways of engaging that honor the spoken and unspoken principles of OST? Would we be better off if we could be both invisible and visible, or are we better off being only invisible? I've struggled with the two issues of space invaders and invisibility for a long time, but never saw them as linked before. Whew. Judi, you said so many other things, thank you, perhaps we'll have a chance to return to some of those ideas another time, or perhaps someone else will pick up one of those threads and weave their understanding into this tapestry ~ Julie * * ========================================================== osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu ------------------------------ To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu, Visit: http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html * * ========================================================== osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu ------------------------------ To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu, Visit: http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html