Thanks Chris You are a wise man and this is precisely what I was hinting at.
I struggle with fear and control in my life and hence my irkdness when I encounter it in others: spot it you got it sort of stuff. While I would like to say I'm beyond fear and control I am still having a human experience of life and suffer terribly from paralysis and needing to be in control on a daily basis. Nowhere sometimes more profoundly than with Open Space. Changing to a mentality of "don't just do something sit there" is a big leap for me. Your image of the coin is perfect. It marries the polarity of holding tight and letting go well. Thank you kindly, I will contemplate this some more now. Mike -----Original Message----- From: Chris Corrigan [mailto:[email protected]] Sent: Wednesday, 29 October 2003 11:04 a.m. To: [email protected] Subject: Re: Fear and control For me every one is different. I keep a log of them, some of which I turn into stories which I share here, others of which just sit in my journal as statistics with the little gem that makes it unique noted. Fear and control dance in a positive feedback loop. The more you have of one, the more you have of the other. I think we seek to alleviate our fears by exerting control, by clinging to orthodoxy of fundamentals. The tighter we squeeze, the more afraid we are. But if we are able to loosen ourselves up and surf (as Harrison and many others have said) then we find that being rooted in some basic principles makes a lot of sense, while at the same time manifesting those principles in exactly appropriate ways. We continue the dance, but this time in the other direction. If someone gives you four principles, investigate them, play with them, use them. If they make sense, keep using them; if they don't, then stop using them. So I am with you on the love and trust thing. Love oneself, and the people one is working with. Trust everyone and the process. Make good decisions and loosen up tightness. Then things start to flow. I'll give you this gem today Mike, which I got out of the Tibetan Book of Living and Dying and which gives me a nice metaphor for thinking about how we both let go without losing everything: "Let's try an experiment. Pick up a coin. Imagine that it represents the object which you are grasping. Hold it tightly, clutched in your fist and extend your arm, with the palm of your hand facing the ground. Now if you let go or relax your grip, you will lose what you are clinging onto. That's why you hold on. But there's another possibility. You can let go and yet keep hold of it. With your arm still outstretched, turn your hand over so that it faces the sky. Release your hand and the coin still rests on your open palm. You let go. And the coin is still yours, even with all this space around it. So there is a way in which we can accept impermanence and still relish life, at one and the same time, without grasping. -- Sogyal Rinpoche, The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying, pp. 34-35" I've been turning over that image in my mind for a few months now, and it really works for me. Chris --- CHRIS CORRIGAN Bowen Island, BC, Canada http://www.chriscorrigan.com <http://www.chriscorrigan.com> [email protected] <mailto:[email protected]> (604) 947-9236 -----Original Message----- From: OSLIST [mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of Mike Copeland Sent: Tuesday, October 28, 2003 1:06 PM To: [email protected] Subject: Fear and control G'day Chris With the time differences I seem to get your profound e-mails first thing in the morning; they are an inspiring start to the day. Thanks for this most interesting data? I'll be sure to remember to say Xitchangani phapharati (Butterfly) when facilitating open space with the Bantu of Mozambique! Then again I could always hook my thumbs together and wave my hands. But this could be mistaken for a bird? And what will I do to demonstrate a bee? The dilemmas one faces with this open space stuff! Here's a thought re all this juicy stuff we banter back and forth across cyber space. While I realise the need for quality and the tweaking of the process for our own improvement at times I feel a certain formulaic mentality creeping in. A certain sense that Open Space could become this mechanistic formula that when done exactly the one, right, true, way will then yield these results.... . Open space to me is about accepting life on life's terms: Whoever comes are the right people, What ever happens is the only thing that could have etc. I wasn't at Swemark so I was not privy to those conversations. Did anyone post that perhaps OS is ultimately about love and trust instead of fear and control? No matter what I come across these days it seems when I hit closed space, power, control and ultimately fear are lurking somewhere in the background. A penny for y,alls thoughts Mike Copeland -----Original Message----- From: Chris Corrigan [mailto:[email protected] <mailto:[email protected]> ] Sent: Wednesday, 29 October 2003 8:14 a.m. To: [email protected] Subject: "Butterfly" in 95 languages I'm sure some of you will find this interesting, if not useful. Here is a link for an essay including translations for the word "butterfly" in 95 languages: http://snurl.com/2r8g <http://snurl.com/2r8g> Enjoy! Chris --- CHRIS CORRIGAN Bowen Island, BC, Canada http://www.chriscorrigan.com <http://www.chriscorrigan.com> [email protected] (604) 947-9236 * * ========================================================== [email protected] ------------------------------ To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of [email protected], Visit: http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html <http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html> _____ Attention: This e-mail (and attachments) is confidential and may be legally privileged. _____ * * ========================================================== [email protected] ------------------------------ To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of [email protected], Visit: http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html * * ========================================================== [email protected] ------------------------------ To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of [email protected], Visit: http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html ############################################## This e-mail (and attachments) is confidential and may be legally privileged. ############################################## * * ========================================================== [email protected] ------------------------------ To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of [email protected], Visit: http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html
