Hi Bui,

 

My experience is that the 'person' slowly being left behind is generally 
counselled by the compassionate people in the session who are being affected 
but not enough to get up and leave. Those that leave also learn a lesson about 
their level of tolerance. Hopefully people give a few warnings that they are 
not enjoying the tone/direction and give the 'person' an opportunity to correct 
their course - I use a picture of 'darth vader' with a red cross through him to 
indicate the 'space invader' and often see people pointing towards the image 
when someone is dominating the session - most people have a laugh and the 
person corrects themselves pretty quickly and choses to either stay or leave 
(and usually return a little later) depending on how they respond to their now 
enlightened state regarding their overly passionate approach to the topic.

 

Cheers, Tan

 

-----Original Message-----
From: OSLIST [mailto:osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu] On Behalf Of Bui K. 
Petersen
Sent: Friday, 16 February 2007 10:07 AM
To: osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu
Subject: Re: Law of Two Feet [Sec=Unclassified]

 

This is what I was afraid of. I think is a situation where mediation would be 
more effective. In conflict resolution we often say "all behaviour makes 
sense". Empathy and compassion is usually more effective than a 2X4.

I want to add that the scenario I am thinking is not when the person in 
question is a boss but more like a regular member of a community. It would be 
unfortunate if someone chose to leave a community as a result of an OS event. 
But perhaps there are other perspectives out there.

Búi

Harrison Owen wrote: 

"I wonder how empowering it is for the individual left behind?"

 

Well, if that "difficult" person was a command and control boss - it is 
possible, though perhaps not likely, that he will learn something. Then again, 
he might go and seek alternative employment. Or - all those folks he was 
intimidating might do the same thing. Sometimes the universe has to hit you on 
the side of the head with a 2X4 just to get your attention. Painful, but 
effective.

 

Harrison

 

Harrison Owen

7808 River Falls Drive

Potomac, Maryland   20854

Phone 301-365-2093

Skype hhowen

Open Space Training www.openspaceworld.com <http://www.openspaceworld.com/>  

Open Space Institute www.openspaceworld.org <http://www.openspaceworld.org/> 

Personal website www.ho-image.com <http://www.ho-image.com/>  

OSLIST: To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives 
Visit: www.listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html 
<http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html> 

 

-----Original Message-----
From: OSLIST [mailto:osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu] On Behalf Of Bui K. 
Petersen
Sent: Thursday, February 15, 2007 2:31 PM
To: osl...@listserv.boisestate.edu
Subject: Re: Law of Two Feet

 

Thanks for the reassurance, Jack.

However, I am not as concerned about the to the topic and the conversation as I 
am with the affect on the "difficult" individual. While it may be empowering 
for people to simply leave an unfruitful conversation, I wonder how empowering 
it is for the individual left behind?

Búi

Jack Ricchiuto wrote: 

Bui,

This does happen and can hurt the development of content around an otherwise 
attractive topic. If the self-organizing soil of the group is fertile enough, 
people will continue the conversation in different places and in different 
ways, the way water will flow around rocks to whatever openings available. When 
people with passion are given freedom, good things happen no matter what. 

Translation: not to worry.

Be well,

Jack

On 2/15/07, Bui K. Petersen <b...@buildconsensus.ca > wrote: 

As someone who is still just learning and trying to find out how and when OST 
can be used, I am curious about people's experience with the effect the Law of 
Two Feet can have on irritating dominating personalities. Say for example that 
someone is dominating a group and practically annoying everyone else with the 
result of them using their two feet and leaving. How does this affect the 
person left behind? I have some concerns about what could happen to this person 
but before I mention them, I am interested to hear what others have experienced.

Curious!

Búi

-- 

 

-- 

Búi K. Petersen, Cert. ConRes.
mediator and facilitator
-------------------------------- 
c.solutions 
Vancouver, B.C. Canada 
Phone: 604.724.4954
Web: www.buildconsensus.ca

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