Hi Acee, Sure, we will respond to all reviews soon.
Best regards, Xiaohu > -----邮件原件----- > 发件人: Acee Lindem (acee) [mailto:a...@cisco.com] > 发送时间: 2017年8月25日 4:47 > 收件人: Joe Touch; IETF discussion list; ospf@ietf.org; > draft-ietf-ospf-encapsulation-...@ietf.org > 抄送: TSV Dir > 主题: Re: [OSPF] tsv-dir review of draft-ietf-ospf-encapsulation-cap-06 > > Xiaohu and other Co-authors, > > Please respond to Joe’s comments. You don’t necessarily have to address > them all as he as suggested but please respond. > > Joe, > > For your comment on the introduction, can you provide text? > > Thanks, > Acee > > On 8/24/17, 12:39 AM, "OSPF on behalf of Joe Touch" <ospf-boun...@ietf.org > on behalf of to...@strayalpha.com> wrote: > > >Hi, all, > > > >I am the assigned TSV-ART reviewer for > >draft-ietf-ospf-encapsulation-cap > > > >For background on TSV-ART, please see the FAQ at > ><https://trac.ietf.org/trac/tsv/wiki/TSV-Directorate>. > > > >Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments > >you may receive. > > > >Joe > > > >------ > > > >I've reviewed this document as part of the transport area directorate's > >ongoing effort to review key IETF documents. These comments were > >written primarily for the transport area directors, but are copied to > >the document's authors for their information and to allow them to > >address any issues raised. When done at the time of IETF Last Call, the > >authors should consider this review together with any other last-call > >comments they receive. Please always CC tsv-...@ietf.org if you reply > >to or forward this review. > > > >"This draft has serious issues, described in the review, and needs to > >be rethought." > > > >Although I found no transport issues, there are many fundamental > >problems that need to be corrected before this document should proceed. > >These are summarized below. > > > >Sec1: The introduction jumps too quickly into a list of situations in > >which tunnels are used, two of which are emerging (currently only > >drafts). There are many better and more established examples (going > >back to the M-Bone, the 6-Bone, etc., to VPNs, network virtualization, etc.). > >Terms are used before defined (what is an ingress? are you referring to > >the router or host at which a tunnel is attached, or the input to the > >tunnel itself?). The last two sentences should begin the intro, which > >should expand and explain what is meant (e.g., by "egress tunneling" > >and the reason for wanting to encode tunnels as LSAs. > > > >Sec2: The terminology section is incomplete. The terms tunnel, ingress, > >egress, egress tunneling, etc. are not defined in RFC7770. Only the LSA > >terminology is relevant from that RFC. Other terms need to be defined > >in this doc or used from others. > > > >Sec3: This section is written as if the "Encapsulation Capability TLV" > >is already defined (in RFC7770), rather than being defined herein. The > >section title doesn't match this name, which is confusing. The term TLV > >is itself confusing, as this is really a single TLV of the RI Opaque > >LSA set of types, which itself is represented as a (sub)TLV list. I > >appreciate that this terminology was made confusing in previous, > >established documents, but a bit of explanation would go a long way - > >as would showing the top-level OSPF RI Opaque LSA and where the new > >TBD1 value would appear - before diving into the structure inside this > >new "TLV". > > > >Sec 4: the discussion should clarify what happens if the length field > >is longer than the fields indicated by the sub-TLVs (is this an error > >or padding to be ignored; does the latter present a covert channel). > >additionally, this section refers to RFC5512 - which is being obsoleted > >by ietf-idr-tunnel-encaps - and this pending ID is used as the primary > >reference in Secs 5.1 and 5.2. References to RFC5512 should be replaced > >with that ID (which I'll assume will be published concurrently). > > > >Sec 5: this section refers to the concept of an "invalid" sub-TLV; > >given the previous sentence explains that unknown sub-TLVs are silently > >ignored, then what exactly is an invalid sub-TLV? It further isn't > >clear why 2 octets of type and 2 octets of length are needed (granted > >it provides alignment, but is that really important for this sort of > >application-layer protocol?) > > > >Sec 5.1 and 5.2: it is unclear why the two fundamental sub-TLVs of this > >TLV are defined elsewhere; in specific, the example of the sub-TLV > >should appear here (actually for each of the sub-TLVs). > > > >Sec 5.3 infers IP address version from length, when the version could > >(should) easily encoded either as different types (you have 65K of > >them!) or using an additional few bits (e.g., carved out of the > >excesses noted in Sec 5). > > > >Sec 5.4 - I had to thread through several different sections of the IDR > >ID to figure out what Color meant and how it is used. Granted that is a > >different problem in a different doc, IMO this doc should include > >enough of a summary that this sort of 'traceback' should not be needed > >to understand what is being described. Further, the other doc doesn't > >even explain Color sufficiently, IMO. > > > >Secs 5.6 and 5.7 - There are many rules for how the outer encapsulation > >header is composed, and many fields it may affect beyond QoS and UDP > >destination port. This section is incomplete in describing values for > >the outer header(s) or relationships to the inner header(s). > > > >Sec 6 - I would encourage moving this section earlier, before the > >details of how the LSA is composed. > > > >Sec 7 - the document should describe where experimental values > >can/should be safely used and how collisions are handled; it should > >also explain what happens when a reserved value is seen in an LSA. > > > >---- > > > > > >_______________________________________________ > >OSPF mailing list > >OSPF@ietf.org > >https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/ospf _______________________________________________ OSPF mailing list OSPF@ietf.org https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/ospf