Abby,
This is clearly an issue that you feel very strongly about and one that you are willing to fight for. I applaud you for having such a passion.
Thought it might be worth considering the perspective of others for short time. Abortion for most women is not an easy decision. It is not something they do without an enormous amount of consideration and addressing each of the alternatives. Yet for many, there simply is not a viable alternative. There are women who choose abortion following a rape, or a diagnosis of abnormality - sometimes one that is incompatible with life. For others they decide to have an abortion because their financial circumstances, their emotional state or their immaturity are not compatible with the raising of a child.
Yes, for many adoption is an option. However, this is not something many women wish to consider since it still means continuing with a pregnancy that they do not want. You may see this as convenience, but to do so negates the emotional impact of an unwanted pregnancy on a woman's life. You may also argue that in these cases the mother is not considering the emotional impact on the baby who did not ask to be conceived and certainly would not ask to be aborted. Perhaps.
At the end of the day though, if abortion were not a viable alternative for women legally, it would still take place illegally and would increase the health risk to many many women.
You said that you judge the choice rather than the woman. However, in using such emotional language your argument comes across as being extremely judgemental of the woman. I fail to see how you can judge the choice and not the woman who made it. Judging someone does not mean that you cease to be friends with them as you seemed to imply when you mentioned that your close friend had an abortion. Judging someone is about thinking less of them for their choices or lifestyle. Can you honestly say that you still have the same respect for your friend after she chose an abortion?
If you have ever been in a position where you had to face an unwanted pregnancy, then I applaud you again for making the decision to keep your baby against the odds or for making an extremely difficult choice of adoption. If you have never been in this position then please consider how it feels to walk the shoes of a woman who discovers she is pregnant and feels simply devastated by this and unable to continue with her pregnancy.
Women who choose abortion know all too well that they are ending a life. They also understand the magnitude of such a decision. It is not light hearted nor is it a choice they want to make.
Surely our goal should be to help women have healthy babies when they want them, provide support to those who choose to adopt their babies out and show compassion for those who feel they can no longer continue with their pregnancy and choose abortion.
Clearly those on the pro life and the pro choice sides of the fence are never going to see eye to eye on this issue. But if our focus is on helping women in all their choices to make the choice that is best for them, and providing education to help women understand their options, we are at least working towards the same goal.
Respectfully,
Nikki Macfarlane www.childbirthinternational.com
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