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http://vcnv.org/attuned-to-tom-and-jerry

Attuned to Tom and Jerry
By Kathy Kelly | July 24, 2007

Last week, Umm Daoud, (her name means “Mother of Daoud”), met me and three
friends at a bridge that crosses into her neighborhood. It was just after
sundown; the streets were darkening as she guided us toward the narrow
path which leads to her home. She and her five children live in a humble
two room apartment in a crowded “low-rent” area of Amman.

As guests, my friends and I sat on a makeshift piece of furniture, an old
door placed atop two crates and covered by a thin mat. She and her
children sat on the floor. Apart from a television and a small table, the
living room had no other furniture. The television remained “on” while
Samil, her youngest son, seemed completely absorbed in a “Tom and Jerry”
cartoon.

“Tom and Jerry” antics are a favorite in almost every home I visit here.
Spanning multiple generations and regions, the duo’s popularity seems to
reflect benign values. “Sometimes Tom wins and sometimes Jerry, and
sometimes they both win, especially if they team up against an enemy,” a
young Iraqi woman told me. “You love them both. It’s a bit like fights
between brothers and sisters.”

Incalculably less benign are the “real life” chase scenes Umm Daoud’s
family has endured. When I first met them, five months ago, Abu Daoud, the
father, told me that he had been a prosperous goldsmith in Baghdad. “We
had two houses and two cars,” said Umm Daoud. “Now, I have two brothers
killed, and all this suffering, and no way to take care of my children.”
Abu Daoud told us that two years ago, Daoud, his teenage eldest child, was
kidnapped for ransom in Baghdad. Fearful for their son’s life and wanting
to save him from torture, the family sold all that they had, gained his
release, and swiftly escaped with him into Jordan.

Abu Daoud came to Amman and moved his family into their current home,
hopeful that he might eventually find work. But for an “illegal” resident
in Jordan, among hundreds of thousands of others who’ve fled Iraq, there
was no work. He sought help from the few groups doling out rations of food
and assistance with rent. Young boys would taunt him, calling him an old
man and an “Iraqi terrorist”, while adults would threaten to report him to
the authorities as an “illegal” - but still he had to keep seeking work.

Three months ago, Abu Daoud learned that his cousin, in Iraq, had received
a death threat. The cousin tried to flee Baghdad, but was unable to do so
swiftly enough. When his body was found, it was chopped into pieces. This
news further traumatized Abu Daoud. Engulfed by pain and misery, he became
abusive toward his wife and children. Fights erupted between them. Two
months ago, Abu Daoud disappeared. His wife believes he fled because he
couldn’t bear facing them, each day, with his feelings of anxiety and
guilt.

Umm Daoud’s eyes fill with smoldering fury as she spills out feelings of
frustration, mistrust, and humiliation.

Neighbors in adjoining homes practice a very conservative form of Islam.
Even though Umm Daoud is a Sabean, she fears being judged harshly by them
and opts to cover her head whenever she leaves the house. When her husband
left her, some of these neighbors said this was a punishment she deserved.
She’d like to live elsewhere, beyond their threats and curses, but she
can’t afford the rent anywhere else.

Two of the daughters are diabetic, needing weekly insulin injections, but
Umm Daoud can afford neither the medicine nor the lab work to track their
illness. Now, one of her daughter’s eyesight is failing. Untreated insulin
can lead to full blindness. Umm Daoud has to hide all of this from her
neighbors. They may be here for a long time, and if the neighbors find out
that the girls are diabetic, she fears it could destroy their future.
Would it be difficult to find suitors for them? I’m not sure. Looking at
these beautiful young women, it seems unlikely, but blindness is a
frightening condition, —who am I to guess? Umm Daoud herself needs medical
attention for a kidney ailment, but her daughters’ untreated medical
crisis takes up all her attention.

Caritas, a charity organization in Amman, offers free medical checkups for
Iraqis, but no medications.

Through registering with the UNHCR, the family became eligible for a
“salary” of 60 Jordanian Dinar per month. This barely covers rent. A light
fixture in the room where they all sleep is broken, but they can’t afford
to fix it, nor can they manage a simple plumbing job to repair a faucet
that steadily, noisily leaks.

They are too terrified to invite a repair man into the home because the
daughters are vulnerable and could be exploited. If a man took advantage
of them, they would have no recourse for protection because anyone could
accuse them of being illegal residents, causing them to be deported back
to Iraq.

Umm Daoud has already been stung by the humiliation of being so
vulnerable. Once, in Amman, a gang stole a sum of money from her. She
reported it to the police. In the investigation, someone accused her of
being a prostitute and the police department dropped the case.

One note of good news gladdened Umm Daoud and her daughters. Daoud, the
older son, excels in soccer and recently qualified for an Iraqi team
invited to compete in Seoul, South Korea. For Daoud, a victim of torture
when he was kidnapped, playing soccer has been part of recovery. He’s in
control on the field and the sport has been an important form of therapy.
Numerous Iraqis in the “illegal” community pooled money for Daoud’s trip.

Toward the end of our visit, Daoud called from Seoul. The family was
jubilant, except for little Samil, watching his Tom and Jerry cartoon with
his back turned to the family. From where I sat, I could see his face. He
showed no emotion whatsoever and never took his eyes off the TV screen. I
remembered the playful ten-year old I’d first met, in January of 2007, a
little boy whose eyes were alight and animated, who loved climbing onto
his father’s lap. The family seems to understand his need to withdraw.

Before leaving, Noah Merrill, who, with his wife, Natalie, has worked hard
to design a project called “Direct Aid Initiative,” (see
www.electroniciraq.net), suggested that they could help cover some of the
family’s medical expenses. He assured Umm Daoud that this would be an act
of friendship, not charity. “Of course it’s not charity!” she said,
flinging her hands upward in exasperation. “You already have our oil!” She
cocked her head slightly, a smile on her face. “You are perhaps living
well with our oil,” she said, as we all nodded our heads, “so this is not
a charity.” Such humor, as if this whole nightmare of the war and its
complications were just brothers and sisters fighting, and she could wryly
forgive.

The UNHCR has appealed for $121 million dollars to assist Iraqis who’ve
been displaced from their homes, 2.2 million of whom are internally
displaced inside Iraq and close to two million more who have sought
shelter in neighboring countries. UN documents appeal to people’s
charitable instincts, but UN workers know full well just how politicized
the discussions have become.

The U.S. could direct the amount of money spent on just six hours of the
war in Iraq and fully meet the UNHCR request to assist millions of people
who have barely survived this U.S. “war of choice.”

This week, the U.S. government will continue deliberating over how much
money to earmark for particular defense expenditures. They will serve the
insatiable demands of the largest lobby on Capitol Hill, the defense
lobby, which is asking for a total of $648.8 billion dollars.

Even Senator Kennedy, one of the few Senators advocating measures to
benefit Iraqi refugees, recommends allotting $100 million in the 2008
defense budget for a new General Electric fighter engine. (The Boston
Globe recently reported that the Air Force said it didn’t even need the
item.)

Democratic candidates claim they are interested in ending the Iraq war.
They claim concern for Iraqi victims. I believe these claims. Yet by
obediently funding the war machine, most of them play predictable,
scripted roles in a dull and murderous war without end. The victors are
always the same, the bloated and menacing producers of weapons, - General
Dynamics, Boeing, Raytheon, Lockheed, General Electric, - the fat cats
whose menacing force always wins. The losers can watch their children
become crippled, starved, maimed or dead. Period.

Yesterday, Umm Daoud and her daughters paid me a visit. Samil chose to
stay behind. He didn’t want to miss an episode of Tom and Jerry.


Kathy Kelly ([EMAIL PROTECTED]) is a co-coordinator of Voices for Creative
Nonviolence

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HOW TO STOP A WAR: GET INVOLVED!

OCCUPATION PROJECT - AUGUST 6 AND BEYOND
On August 6, 2007 a reinvigorated Occupation Project campaign will
launch with acts of nonviolent civil disobedience / civil resistance
and office occupations occurring through at least the end of
September.
See: http://vcnv.org/project/the-occupation-project
Contact VCNV at 773-878-3815 or [EMAIL PROTECTED]

DECLARATION OF PEACE DAYS OF DECISION — SEPTEMBER 14 - 21
Declare Peace! by taking nonviolent action -- including nonviolent
civil disobedience or other forms of creative, peaceful witness -- at
Congressional offices or other sites anytime from Friday, September 14
through Friday, September 21, the International Day of Peace.
FOR MORE INFORMATION SEE: http://declarationofpeace.org

-----

DELEGATION TO COLUMBIA
September 6 to 16, 2007
Organized by 8th Day Center for Justice; School of the Americas Watch;
and Witness for Peace.

Friends of Voices at the 8th Day Center for Justice in Chicago are
organizing this delegation to Columbia. Delegates will meet with
former prisoners, prisoner support groups, human rights advocates,
labor organizers, campesinos, women's groups, business people, and
others.  Delegates will also engage in dialogue with Columbian
military, SOA graduates and U.S. Embassy personnel.

Applications are due by August 1. The delegation cost is $1300 per person.

For more information, please contact Erin Cox at the 8th Day Center,
via email [EMAIL PROTECTED] or phone, 312-641-5151.

---
Voices for Creative Nonviolence
1249 W Argyle Street #2, Chicago, IL 60640
Phone: (773) 878-3815
E-mail: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
web: http://www.vcnv.org

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