FLASH!!!!!  The truly wealthy (an wannabes) have been outsourcing their
children for generations.  Ever hear of the private boarding school?
Unfortunately, even professional contractors can't overcome bad genes -- a
product of a too small ruling class with overly restrictive notions about
breeding outside the class.


At 02:30 PM 3/30/97 -0800, James Michael Craven wrote:
>It's simple: outsource up to but not beyond the point where the 
>marginal cost of outsourcing one's children equals the marginal 
>benefit and... Market "Efficiency" Uber Alles.
>
>
> SUBJ: 
>Bill Adler To Outsource Children >>>
>
>>>>GRANADA HILLS, CA - Bill Adler, UNIX System Administrator and father
>>>>of two girls, has announced plans to outsource his children to a
>>>>private enterprise specializing in child rearing as part of his
>>>>family's cost-saving effort. Adler said that his request for
>>>>proposals will go out later this Spring, and that he hopes that a
>>>>contractor will be in place by Summer 1997.
>>>>
>>>>Adler says that he anticipates saving 25% of his child rearing
>>>>expenses by hiring a company that specializes in the field. He
>>>>believes that between the things that his kids destroy, the wear and
>>>>tear the kids put on the family residence and vehicles, and the
>>>>other expenses such as sports, scouts, and lessons, he should be
>>>>able to a pay a private firm about 75% of what he currently spends
>>>>on his children.
>>>>
>>>>Although his children have expressed concern that being raised by
>>>>non-parents would be impersonal and would deprive them of some of
>>>>their current privileges, Adler has worked to alleviate their fears.
>>>>He held a family dinner meeting to announce the decision and told
>>>>the kids that mere parents don't really know how to raise kids until
>>>>the kids are grown. This is obvious because every grandparent on the
>>>>street has advice to give to any parent they meet. A professional
>>>>child-rearing service would already know how to raise children and
>>>>not make the mistakes of a rookie parent.
>>>>
>>>>The outsource proposal requires companies to provide the children
>>>>with benefits at least the same overall level as they receive at
>>>>home, with some benefits (TV hours for example) expanding, and
>>>>others (parental attention) declining. The proposal mandates certain
>>>>"core" benefits -- food, clothing, and schooling -- but leaves the
>>>>non-core (music, sports, television) at the discretion of the
>>>>contractor.
>>>>
>>>>The outsourcing would phase in over a six-month period, with the
>>>>children initially spending daytime hours at their outsource site
>>>>and sleeping at their parent's home, but as space becomes available
>>>>off site, the children will begin spending all their time away from
>>>>home except when they are desperately needed at home (for example,
>>>>when yard work needs to be done).
>>>>
>>>>The children originally expressed dismay at residing off site, but
>>>>Adler told them that they would have weekly visitation to the house
>>>>to retrieve any personal belongings, get new books, and perform
>>>>their musical instruments for and talk to their parents. This would
>>>>also allow the kids to visit their pets (two dogs, three cats) -- at
>>>>least until phase 2 of Adler's cost cutting plan, which includes
>>>>outsourcing the family pets.
>>>>
>>>>Adler would not say where he came up with the idea of outsourcing
>>>>the children, other than to admit that he and his wife were having a
>>>>discussion about family finances which illustrated the need to raise
>>>>the family in a "cheaper, faster, better" mode. Although his wife
>>>>was initially reluctant to have the children raised off site, Adler
>>>>convinced her to accept the scheme because she, too, was eligible
>>>>for "outsourcing."
>
>                               Jim Craven
>                           source: Future Work    
>
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