>Date: Mon, 04 Jan 1999 13:26:44 -0600 >From: Arthur Wilke <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> >Subject: An Academic Sociology Parable >Sender: [EMAIL PROTECTED] >To: PSN-CAFE <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> >Reply-to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] >X-To: PSN-CAFE <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > >Not only are there few, if any, heroic stories >from academic life, humor is often limited >compared with, for example, lawyer jokes. Here >is a rare story of unknown authorship featuring >a sociologist. > >Arthur Wilke >Auburn University > > PARABLE OF ACADEMIC LIFE > > One day while walking downtown, a well >known sociologist was hit by a bus and was >tragically killed. Her soul arrived up in >heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by >St. Peter [a social construction] himself. > "Welcome to Heaven," said St. Peter. >"Before you get settled in though, it seems we >have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we've >never once had a sociologist make it this far >and we're not really sure what to do with you." > "No problem, just let me in" said the >woman. "Well, I'd like to, but I have higher >orders. What we're going to do is let you have >a day in Hell and a day in Heaven and then you >can choose where you want to spend eternity" >the Saint replied. > "Actually, I think I've made up my >mind.....I prefer to stay in Heaven", even the >Hell should be more exciting for research. >"Sorry, we have rules....." And with that St. >Peter put the scholar in an elevator and it >went down-down-down to Hell. The doors opened >and the sociologist found herself stepping out >into a beautiful seminar room. Down the hall >was a lavishly appointed lounge, complete with a >small but useful reference library. Standing >in front of her were all her former colleagues, >a veritable Who's Who of the sociological world, >all cheering for her. They ran up and kissed >her on both cheeks and they talked about old >functionalist times. They had an exciting >theoretical discussions trashing post-modernism >and anthropology, and then retired to the >faculty club for an excellent steak and lobster >dinner. She met the Devil, who was actually a >really nice guy, resembling Max Weber. And >although he was a political economist, he >showed a real interest in her work. They >talked and joked into the wee hours of the >morning. The sociologist was having such a good >time that before she knew it, it was time to >leave. Everybody shook her hand and waved >good-bye as she got on the elevator. The >elevator went up-up-up and opened back up at the >Pearly Gates where St. Peter was waiting for >her. > "Now it's time to spend a day in Heaven" he >said. So the sociologist spent the next 24 >hours lounging around on the clouds and playing >the harp and singing. She had a great time and >before she knew it, her 24 hours were up and >St. Peter came and got her. > "So, you've spent a day in Hell and you've >spent a day in Heaven. Now you must choose your >eternity" he said. > The sociologist paused for a second and >then replied, "well, I never thought I'd say >this. I mean, Heaven has been really great and >all, but I think professionally I had a better >time in Hell." > So, St. Peter escorted her to the elevator >and again the scholar went down-down-down back >to Hell. When the doors of the elevator opened >she found herself standing in a desolate >wasteland covered in garbage and filth. She saw >that her colleagues were dressed in rags and >were picking up garbage and putting it in sacks >for the evening meal. They barely paused in >their work long enough to grumble and tell her >that they thought her research was second rate. > Max himself came up to her and put his arm >around her and laughed at her. > "I don't understand," stammered the great >sociologist, "yesterday I was here and there >was a library and a faculty club and we ate >lobster and we talked about my research and had >a great time. Now all there is a wasteland of >garbage and all my colleagues look miserable." >Max looked at her and grinned, "that's because >yesterday we were interviewing you, but today >you're faculty." >
