Election 2008 In Brief
October 12, 2008 9:02 PM by S.M. Oliva
There are two major parties in the United States. One party nominated a man who always needs to be perceived as the hero. The other party nominated a man who constantly requires the approval of others. I forget which one is which.
The voters are themselves divided. Most voters support individual rights - but not for anyone beside themselves. Some voters think credentials are important for the presidency. Others think credentials are important for the vice presidency.
Many voters are concerned about the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. The Republican nominee doesn't share these concerns. The Democratic nominee is very concerned and he will do something about it . . . not now, of course, but maybe after he's out of office.
Many voters are concerned about the economy. The Republican nominee admits he knows nothing about economics. The Democratic nominee thinks that eventually socialism will simply work - just like in Star Trek.
Many voters are concerned about civil liberties. The Republican nominee admits he knows nothing about civil liberties. The Democratic nominee thinks the problem is low self-esteem, which can be solved by putting him on more magazine covers.
Many voters are concerned about health care. The Republican nominee says he knows how to fix the health care system - after all, he's been in Congress for 25 years. The Democratic nominee personally guarantees he can provide health care for everyone - after all, he did go to Harvard Law School.
Many voters are concerned about the courts. The Republican nominee wants judges who will always agree with him, even when he doesn't know what he believes. The Democratic nominee wants judges who will be nice to people and not make them feel bad when they violate other people's rights.
Many voters are concerned about the right to keep and bear arms. The Republican nominee is sort of okay with this - as long as the government has more guns. The Democratic nominee is sort of okay with this - as long as the government has more guns.
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