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JAY LENO SET FREE
Now that he's a short timer, Jay does not feel constrained to stay within
the network guidelines of "no Obama criticism and staying politically
correct" -- what a breath of fresh air!
"I was going to start off tonight with an Obama joke, but I don't
want to get audited by the IRS."
On NSA surveillance: "We wanted a president who listens to all
Americans - now we have one."
On a new IRS commissioner: "He's called 'acting commissioner'
because he has to act like the scandal doesn't involve the White House."
On closing the Guantanamo prison for terrorists: "If he really
wants to close it, turn it into a government-funded solar power company.
The doors will be shut in a month."
Concerning the Benghazi , Associated Press, and IRS scandals:
"Remember in the old days when President Obama's biggest
embarrassment was Joe Biden?"
On Obama saying he didn't know about the IRS scandal: "He was too
busy not knowing anything about Benghazi to not know anything about the
IRS."
"The White House has a new slogan about Benghazi: Hope and change
the subject."
"It's casual Friday, which means that at the White House, they're
casually going through everybody's phone calls and records."
"It is not looking good for President Obama. Today his
teleprompter took the fifth."
"Fox News has changed its slogan from 'Fair and Balanced' to 'See,
I told you so!'"
On Obama's commencement address: "He told the young graduates
their future is bright unless, of course, they want jobs."
On a Chicago man who set a record for riding a Ferris wheel: "The
only other way to go around and around in a circle that many times is to
read the official report on Benghazi ."
On White House claims of ignorance on the scandals: "They took
'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' out of the Pentagon and moved it into the
White House."
now the last, and I think best!--
"These White House scandals are not going away anytime
soon. It's gotten so bad that People in Kenya are now saying he's 100
percent American."
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