____________________________________
 From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Sent: 11/15/2014 8:57:36  A.M. Pacific Standard Time
Subj: Can't fix stupid





 
 
 
 
The best one is  about Pelosi (and remember this was the person 3rd in line 
to succeed to  the president of the U. S.)



Subject:  Can't fix  stupid




 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 




 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 


*One  day I was walking down the beach with


 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Some  friends when someone shouted.....
'Look at that dead  bird!'
Someone looked up at the sky and  said...'where?'

They  walk among us!

----------------------------------------------------------  

While  looking at a house, my brother asked the
Estate agent which direction  was north because
He didn't want the sun waking him up every  morning.
She asked, 'Does the sun rise in the north?'
My brother  explained that the sun rises in the east
And has for sometime. She  shook her head and said,
'Oh, I don't keep up with all that  stuff......'

They  Walk Among  Us!
-------------------------------------------- 

My  colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria,
when we  overheard an admin girl talking about the
sunburn she got on her  weekend drive to the beach.
She drove down in a convertible, but  said
she 'didn't think she'd get sunburned
because the car was  moving'.

They  Walk Among  Us!
------------------------------------ 

My  sister has a lifesaving tool in her car
which is designed to cut  through a seat belt
if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the car  trunk.

They Walk Among Us! 
-------------------------------------------------

I  couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area and went to the  
lost luggage office and reported the loss.
The woman there smiled and  told me not to worry
because she was a trained professional  and
said I was in good hands. 'Now,' she asked me,
'Has your plane  arrived yet?'...
(I work with professionals like  this.)

They  Walk Among Us!
------------------------------------------------
 
 
 
 
 
While  working at a pizza parlor I observed a man
ordering a small pizza to  go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked 
him if he would like it  cut
into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time
then  said 'Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry
enough to  eat 6 pieces.

They  Walk Among Us! 


Dumb  as a box of Rocks
TRUE  STORY:

A  noted psychiatrist was a guest speaker at an academic function where  
Nancy Pelosi happened to appear. Ms Pelosi took the opportunity to  schmooze 
the good doctor a bit and asked him a question with which he  was most at 
ease.

'Would you mind telling me, Doctor,' she asked,  'how you detect a mental 
deficiency in somebody who appears completely  normal?'

'Nothing is easier,' he replied. 'You ask a simple  question which anyone 
should answer with no trouble. If the person  hesitates, that puts you on the 
track..'

'What sort of question?'  asked Pelosi.

Well, you might ask , 'Captain Cook made three  trips around the world and 
died during one of them. Which  one?''

Pelosi thought a moment, and then said with a nervous  laugh, 'You wouldn't 
happen to have another example would you? I must  confess I don't know much 
about history.'


Sadly,  they walk among us!
Traffic Camera  

A man was  driving when he saw the flash of a  traffic camera. He figured 
that  his picture had been taken for exceeding the limit, even though  he 
knew that he was  not speeding... Just to be sure, he went around the block and 
passed the  same spot, driving even more slowly, but again the camera 
flashed. Now  he began to think that this was quite funny, so he drove even 
slower as  he passed the area again, but the traffic camera again flashed. He 
tried  a fourth time with the same result.. He did this a fifth time and was  
now laughing when the camera flashed as he rolled past, this time at a  
snail's pace... Two weeks later, he got five tickets in the mail for  driving 
without a seat belt.. 

You can't fix  stupid.
 
 





 

 

 





















































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