A RETIREE'S LAST TRIP TO  COSTCO



Yesterday I was at Costco buying a large  bag of Purina dog chow for my
loyal pet, Buddy, the Wonder Dog,  which weighs 91 lbs. I was in the
check-out line when a woman  behind me asked if I had a dog.



What did she think I had .. an  elephant?



So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that
no, I didn't have a dog, I was  starting the Purina Diet again. I added
that I probably  shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time,
but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward
with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.



I told her that it was essentially a  Perfect Diet and that the way that it
works is, to load your jacket pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat
one or two  every time you feel hungry.   The food is nutritionally
complete ,   so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to
mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my
story.)



Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food
poisoned me. I told her no,  I stopped to Pee on a Fire Hydrant and a car
hit me.



I thought the guy behind her was going  to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard.



Costco won't let me shop there anymore.  Better watch what you ask retired
people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to
say.







Forward this  (especially) to all your retired friends...it will be their
laugh for the  day!




















































































































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