: - )
On Jan 17, 3:34 pm, Travis <[email protected]> wrote: > From: Travis > Subject: To The Guy Who Mugged Me.... > Date: Thursday, January 15, 2009, > > *To the Guy Who Mugged Me Downtown (Downtown, **Savannah)* > ------------------------------ > I was the white guy with the black Burrberry jacket that you demanded I > hand over shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend. You > also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I hope you somehow come > across this message. I'd like to apologize. > > I didn't expect you to crap your pants when I drew my pistol after you took > my jacket. Truth is, I was wearing the jacket for a reason that evening, and > it wasn't that cold outside. You see, my girlfriend had just bought me that > Kimber 1911 .45 ACP pistol for Christmas, and we had just picked up a > shoulder holster for it that evening. Beautiful pistol, eh? It's a very > intimidating weapon when pointed at your head, isn't it? > > I know it probably wasn't a great deal of fun walking back to wherever you'd > come from with that brown stinking sludge flopping about in your pants. I'm > sure it was even worse since you also ended up leaving your shoes, cell > phone, and wallet with me. I couldn't have you calling up any of your > buddies to come help you try to mug us again. I took the liberty of calling > your mother, or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, and explaining > to her your situation. I also bought myself some gas on your card. I gave > your shoes to one of the homeless guys over by Vinnie Van Go Go's, along > with all of the cash in your wallet, then I threw the wallet itself in a > dumpster. > > I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell. They'll be on your > bill in case you'd like to know which ones. Alltel recently shut down the > line, and I've only had the phone for a little over a day now, so I don't > know what's going on with that. I hope they haven't permanently cut off your > service. I was about to make some threatening phone calls to the DA's office > with it. Oh well. > > So, about your pants. I know that I was a little rough on you when you did > this whole attempted mugging thing, so I'd like to make it up to you. I'm > sure you've already washed your pants, so I'd like to help you out. I'd like > to reimburse you for the detergent you used on the pants. What brand did you > use, and was it liquid or powder? I'd also like to apologize for not killing > you and instead making you walk back home humiliated. I'm hoping that you'll > reconsider your choice of path in life. Next time you might not be so lucky. > If you read this message, email me and we'll do lunch and laundry. Peace! > > - Alex > > -- > *~@):~{> --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ Thanks for being part of "PoliticalForum" at Google Groups. For options & help see http://groups.google.com/group/PoliticalForum * Visit our other community at http://www.PoliticalForum.com/ * It's active and moderated. Register and vote in our polls. * Read the latest breaking news, and more. -~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
