Definitely written by a Harvard PhD. On Thu, Jul 30, 2009 at 10:39 PM, plainolamerican <[email protected] > wrote:
> > " The Signifying Monkey " > > Way down in the jungle deep, > The bad ass lion stepped on the signifyin monkey's feet. > The monkey said, "Muthafucka, can't you see? > Why, you standin on my goddamn feet!" > The lion said, "I ain't heard a word you said." > Said, "If you say three more I'll be steppin on yo muthafuckin head!" > Now, the monkey lived in the jungle in an old oak tree. > Bullshittin the lion everyday of the week. > Why, everyday before the sun go down, > The lion would kick his all through the jungle town. > But the monkey got wise and started usin his wit. > Said, "I'm gon' put a stop to this ole ass kickin shit!" > So he ran up on the lion the very next day. > Said, "Oh Mr. lion, there's a big, bad muthafucka comin your way. > And when you meet, it's gonna be a goddamn sin, > And wherever you meet some ass is bound to bend." > Said, "he's somebody that you don't know, > He just broke a-loose from the Ringlin Brother's show." > Said, "Baby, he talked about your people in a helluva way! > He talked about your people till my hair turned gray! > He said your daddy's a freak and your momma's a whore. > Said he spotted you running through the jungle sellin asshole from > door to door! > Said your sister did the damndest trick. > She got down so low and sucked a earthworm's dick. > Said he spotted yo niece behind the tree, > Screwin a muthafuckin flea! > He said he saw yo aunt sittin on the fence > Givin a goddamn zebra a french. > Then he talked about yo mammy and yo sister Lou, > Then he start talkin about how good yo grandmaw screw. > Said yo sister's a prostitute and yo brother's a punk, > And said I'll be damned if you don't eat all the pussy you see every > time you get drunk! > He said he cornholed your uncle and fucked your aunty and niece, > And next time he see yo grandmaw he gonna get him another good piece. > Said your brother died with the whoopin cough and your uncle died with > the measles > And your old grandpaw died with a rag chunked up in his ass, said he's > goin on home to Jesus. > And you know yo little sister that ya love so dear > I fucked her all day for a bottle of beer. > So, Mr. Lion, you know that ain't right. > Whenever you meet the elephant be ready to fight." > So the lion jumped up in a helluva rage! > Like a young cocksucker full of gage. > He let out a roar! > Tail shot back like a forty-four. > He went through the jungle knockin down trees, > Kickin giraffes to their knees. > The he ran up on the elephant talkin to the swine. > He said, "All right you big, bad muthafucka. It's gonna be yo ass or > mine." > The elephant looked at him outta the corner of his eyes. > Said, "Alright go ahead home you little funny-bunny muthafucka and > pick on somebody your own size. > The lion jumped up and made a fancy pass. > The elephant side-stepped him and kicked him dead in his ass. > He busted up his jaw, fucked up his face. > Broke all four legs, snatched his ass outta place. > He picked him up, slammed him to the tree. > Nothin but lion shit as far as you could see. > He pulled out his nuts, rolled em in the sand. > And kicked his ass like a natural man! > They fought all night and all the next day. > Somehow the lion managed to get away. > But he drug his ass back to the jungle more dead than alive. > Just to run into that little monkey and some more of his signifying > jive! > The monkey looked at him and said, "Goddamn ole partner, you don't > look so swell." > Said, "Look like to me you caught a whole lotta hell." > Said, "Yo eyes is all red and yo asshole is blue, > I knew in the beginning it wasn't shit to you. > There's one thing you and me gotta get straight > Cause you one ugly cocksucker I sure do hate! > Now, when you left, the jungle rung > Now you bring yo dog ass back here damn near hung. > Look muthafucka, ain't you a bitch! > Yo face look like you got the Seven Year Itch! > I told my wife before you left, > I should kicked yo ass my muthafuckin self! > Why I seen you when he threw you into that tree, > Cause some of that ole lion shit got on me! > Why every night when me and my wife is tryin to get a little bit, > Here you come around here with some that old "I owe" shit! > Shut up! Don't you roar! > Cause I'll bail outta this tree and whoop yo dog-ass some more! > And don't look up here with yo sucka-paw case. > Cause I'll piss through the bark of this tree in yo muthafuckin face!" > The monkey got happy, started jumpin up and down. > His feet missed the limb and his ass hit the ground. > Like a streak of lighting and a ball of white heat, > That lion was on his ass with all four feet. > Dust rolled and tears came into the little monkey's eyes, > The little monkey said, "Look Mr. Lion, I apologize!" > Said, "If you let me get my nuts out the sand, > I'll fight yo ass like a natural man! > Look muthafucka, ain't you a bitch, you ain't raisin no hell, > Cause everybody saw you jump on me after I slipped and fell." > Said, "If you'll fight like men should > I'd whoop yo ass all over these woods!" > This made the lion mad! > It was the boldest challenge he ever had. > He squared off for the fight, > But that little monkey jumped damn near outta sight! > Landed waaay up in a banana tree and began to grin. > Sayin, "Look here you big, bad muthafucka, you been bullshitted again! > Why, I'll take me one of these bananas, > And whoop on yo ass till it sing the Star Spangled Banner!" > And said, "If you ever mess with me again, > I'm gonna send you back to my elephant friend!" > Said, "The things I told you will never part, > But what I'm gonna tell you know will break yo muthafuckin heart!" > Your mammy ain't no good and yo sister's been a whore" > Said, "I had that bitch on the corner for a year or more!" > But the lion looked up with a helluva frown. > Roared so loud that little monkey fell back to the ground. > The little monkey looked up and said "Please, Mr. Lion! Please don't > take my life! > Cause I got thirteen kids and a very sickly wife!" > Said, "All of my money to you I'll give, Mr. Lion, > Please just let me live!" > But the lion kicked him in his ass and broke his neck, > Left that little monkey in a helluva wreck. > The monkey looked to the sky, > With tears in his eyes. > Nothin he could see or nothin he could hear, > But he knew that it was the end of his bulllshittin and signifyin > career! > > http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Voxp3ckwJZ0 > > On Jul 30, 8:05 pm, Sage2 <[email protected]> wrote: > > This is one of Louis Gates writings. It is an endless non-logic > > in word significants. "Signifying" > > is a needling or groading by means of indirect gibes and clever often > > preposterous put-downs. Also known as " dozen " : a ritual word game > > that consists of exchanging insults usually about the members of the > > opponents family, such as " out with yo moma ", and escalates from > > there. > > Gates was in effect playing this low class urban dweller game with > > Crowley. Gates is supposed to be an " intellectual " ? I think not ! > > > --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ Thanks for being part of "PoliticalForum" at Google Groups. For options & help see http://groups.google.com/group/PoliticalForum * Visit our other community at http://www.PoliticalForum.com/ * It's active and moderated. Register and vote in our polls. * Read the latest breaking news, and more. -~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
