[image: CAP News] Rhode Island gubernatorial candidate Lincoln Chaffee announces his stance in favor of creamy peanut butter. Democrats Throw Support Behind Fresh Fruit
WASHINGTON (CAP) - In a move that critics say will draw the line in the sand for the November elections, the Democratic party has announced that they are supporting fresh fruit. Republican candidates who may have already considered their races won were quick to proclaim their opposition. "My opponent Mr. Caprio will tell you that he enjoys the occasional apple," Rhode Island gubernatorial candidate John Robitaille told a crowd of supporters at an impromptu rally. "Well, ladies and gentlemen, I have not, will not, and do not eat fresh fruit!" Political pundits say the surprise announcement by the Democrats is designed to keep Republicans back on their heels. A disorganized Republican party is not resting on its laurels, however, announcing a variety of initiatives from support of lazy Sunday afternoons to reinstatement of the thin '80s power tie. 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"But are these the right issues? "Of course I want a candidate who supports ripping off a bandaid quick so it hurts less," he said, referring to California Democratic gubernatorial candidate Jerry Brown's statement of same. "What we need to ask is - what kind of bandaid hurts the least?" Reveiz said the sudden influx of new issues could serve only to confuse voters who already have to decide whether to back sliced bread or wearing coats when the weather is chilly. Reveiz said all candidates need to stake their positions now and try to ride the wave of emotion right through November. "For example, [Delaware congressional candidate] Chris Coons needs to be more vocal in his opposition of Christine O'Donnell's support of bite-sized candy bars, because once we hit the Halloween season, that really is O'Donnell's time to shine," Reveiz noted. Democrats are expected to launch an aggressive television ad campaign that focuses on fresh fruit, while it is anticipated the Republicans will counter with delicious salty snacks. Thus far, Tea Party candidates have pretty much just stood there with the refrigerator door open, unable to decide if they want to support a Jello pudding snack or a bologna sandwich with mayo. 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