this is the story from next door milis...
----- Forwarded by Carla Annamarie/PRUIDN/IDN/Prudential on 04/27/2005
02:29 PM -----
EmaiL fr0m Nji
<[EMAIL PROTECTED] To: "\[MiLis\]
d'HadRocKaZ"
o.com> <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
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[EMAIL PROTECTED] Subject: [hardrockfm] [CoMm]
Tanya masalah keluarga
roups.com
04/27/2005 02:14
PM
Please respond to
hardrockfm
Rg, I'm so sorry to hear what happen with ur friend. Tapi coba ditelaah
dulu, knapa dia bisa mengalami tindak kekerasan fisik sampai begitu? Apa
temenlo itu menantang kalo lagi bertengkar dengan suaminya? Laki2 kan
biasanya ga bisa ditantang.. Sesabar2nya orang, pasti ada batasnya..
Tapi kalo temenlo itu bukan termasuk type yang spt itu, wah.. Mendingan dia
bener2 mikir lagi deh..
Pelecehan terhadap perempuan itu tidak hanya dalam bentuk fisik saja. Tapi
juga bisa dalam tindak seksual, psikologis, perkataan dan terakhir, materi.
Perempuan, terkadang memilih untuk jadi pihak yang bertahan. Dengan
harapan, waktu akan mengubah tabiat seseorang. Tapi untuk bertahan, kita
harus mempunyai sesuatu yang bersifat dasar. Cinta bisa menjadi jawabannya
, anak atau ketergantungan materi..
Lebih baik temenlo mencoba untuk memperbaiki pernikahannya dulu. Bisa
dengan menghubungi konselor pernikahan, atau minta bantuan orang2 terdekat
yang dihormati oleh suaminya.
Tapi biasanya, abuser is never going to change and maybe ur friend going to
have a move.
Jadi temenlo harus benar2 menyiapkan segalanya, dan kalopun harus berpisah
[ini benar2 dah jalan terakhir], mendingan temenlo pulang ke Indo dah. Gw
sendiri pernah mengalami hal yang sama. Memang ga sampai pada kekerasan
fisik, tapi mental gw dibikin ampe down banget. Hal itu gw alamin sampai
-/+ 6 tahun usia pernikahan gw.
Dimulai dari kebohongan2 kecil, sampai pada titik yang ga bisa gw tolelir
lagi.
Ga usah takut nanti kehidupan temenlo & anaknya bakal susah. Keep the faith
in God. Kalo temenlo bisa bahasa mandarin, dia bisa jadi guru les. Bisa
nyetir dan punya kendaraan yang layak jalan? Jadi aja supir antar jemput
anak2 sekolah dilingkungan tempat dia tinggal. Waktunya fleksibel, jadi
temenlo tetep bisa merawat anaknya . Or nyambi jadi agen asuransi,
property, etc...
Memang akan susah pada bulan2 pertama. But don't worry, time is the best
healer.
Jangan jadikan anak untuk mempertahankan sesuatu yang rapuh. Kita berhak
koq menentukan kebahagiaan untuk diri kita sendiri. Seorang anak yang
dibesarkan pada lingkungan yang tidak sehat, akan berdampak besar pada
tumbuh kembang jiwanya lho.
Anak gw yang cewe dulu pernah ampe sakit gara2 ngeliat gw berantem melulu
ama papinya..
Jadi gimana kita bisa ngebahagiaan anak kita kalo jiwa kita sendiri
disakitin terus?
Untungnya skarang keadaan jadi terbalik. I have a very very good
relationship with my ex. He's getting married next month, and I'm helping
them preparing the wedding ceremony ..
As her friend, u must offer her alternatives, not advice. Be patient, she
will take action to leave an abusive situation when she is ready. Just
always be there for her...
Mungkin temenlo bisa baca website dibawah ini:
http://www.interpol.int/Public/Children/SexualAbuse/NationalLaws/csaSingapore.asp
Jadi ga dia buta2 amat tentang hukum abuse di S'pore..
Ada lirik lagu bagus nih.. Yang nyanyi Jamelia. Gw demen banget ma ni lagu,
baca deh:
Thank You by Jamelia
"[Verse 1:]
The fights, those nights
I tried to pretend it don't hurt
The way, I prayed
Someday that you would love me
Really, completely
Just how I wanted it to be
But no, so wrong
Can't believe I stayed with you so long
[B-Chorus:]
You hit, you spit, you split, ever-y bit of me, yeah
You stole, you broke, you're cold
You're such a joke to me, yeah
[Chorus:]
For every last bruise you gave me
For every time I sat in tears
For the million ways you hurt me
I just wanna tell you this
You broke my world, made me strong
Thank you
Messed up my dreams, made me strong
Thank you
[Verse 2:]
My head, near dead
Just the way you wanted it
My soul, stone cold
Cos I was under you're control
So young, so dumb
Knew just how to make me succumb
But I understand
To make yourself feel like a man
[B-Chorus:]
You hit, you spit, you split, ever-y bit of me, yeah
You stole, you broke, you're cold
You're such a joke to me, yeah
[Chorus:]
For every last bruise you gave me
For every time I sat in tears
For the million ways you hurt me
I just wanna tell you this
You broke my world, made me strong
Thank you
Messed up my dreams, made me strong
Thank you
[Middle eight:]
You coulda had it all babe
It coulda been so right
I woulda given you everything
Morning through night
Yeah, you taught me some lessons
Those are my blessings
That won't happen again
Thank you
[Chorus till end]"
Rgds, Nji
RG <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
:: Do what you can, for who you can, with what you have, and where you are
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