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At 10:29 am 4/9/00 +1000, you wrote:
>The Sydney Morning Herald
>Saturday April 8, 2000
>
>Time to gag in the race debate
>
>By RICHARD GLOVER
>
>There's a point where the debate gets so puerile, the logic so
>infantile, the
>politics so pathetic, and the national shame so great, there's only one
>sensible response: get someone to create some schoolyard jokes.
>
>I think I may be the man for the job. Herewith: the Stolen
>Generations/Mandatory Sentencing Jokebook.
>
>What do you call John Howard when he's visiting an Aboriginal
>neighbourhood. Lost. What do you call John Howard when he's visiting
>the United Nations?
>
>The defendant.
>
>Why is John Howard like a drug runner?
>
>Because he's afraid to be judged by international customs.
>
>What can't John Howard understand about the rest of the planet?
>
>The way it keeps turning on him.
>
>How many Darwin magistrates does it take to change a light bulb.
>
>They don't bother. They've got no power anyway.
>
>Why is John Howard like Old Sydney Town?
>
>Both offer a variety of 18th-century views.
>
>Have you heard about John Herron's calculator?
>
>Whatever sums he does on it, he always ends up with division.
>
>What's the difference between a black child stealing a truck and a truck
>arriving to steal a black child?
>
>Only one's a crime: the one where the black child knows where he's
>going.
>
>Why is Denis Burke like an Australian bank?
>
>Because the rest of the country constantly gives him money, but he never
>pays any interest.
>
>What's the difference between Herron, and its strychnine-laced headache
>tablets, and Herron, the Aboriginal Affairs Minister?
>
>One produces nausea, incomprehension and vomiting; the other's a
>dangerous headache tablet.
>
>Why does Denis Burke keep talking about State rights, when he lives in a
>Territory?
>
>Given the failure of mandatory sentencing to cure the crime rate, he can
>at
>least claim to be in a state of denial.
>
>Why didn't the racist cross the road?
>
>Because he didn't want to see the other side.
>
>What is black and white but soon will be read all over.
>
>Australia's race relations in the Olympic year.
>
>Why did the Government gag parliamentary debate on the Northern
>Territory?
>
>Because only people in jail should finish their sentences.
>
>Why is a racist like a drunk?
>
>Because everything he says ends in a slur.
>
>Why did the Liberal cross the floor of Parliament?
>
>Because 98 per cent of her party were giving the rest a bad name.
>
>What do you get if you cross Denis Burke with a donkey?
>
>Someone who thinks the sun shines out of his own ass.
>
>Why was the Government happy to intervene over NT euthanasia laws,
>but not over mandatory sentencing laws?
>
>Because it only wants to encourage suicide among young people.
>
>Why is John Howard like sunblock?
>
>He's trying to appeal to rednecks.
>
>Why did Dr Herron stop practising medicine?
>
>Because he kept having an urge to put people down.
>
>Why is a bigot like the announcer at Rosehill?
>
>Because they both start shouting the instant they see a new race.
>
>Have you heard John Howard has finally discovered a new tax that is
>actually popular?
>
>It's attacks on black Australians.
>
>What's the difference between stealing a black child and stealing a
>packet
>of biscuits.
>
>None. Whichever gets stolen, the black child does the time.
>
>Why does the St Vincent's heart transplant team use only the hearts of
>Cabinet ministers?
>
>They prefer ones that have never been used.
>
>What's the difference between the High Court, post-Justice Callinan, and
>the Prime Minister's desk diary?
>
>Nothing. They are both full of political appointments.
>
>Why did the black child steal correcting fluid?
>
>Because he saw it was called White Out.
>
>How many John Howards does it take to change a light bulb?
>
>None. That lightbulb worked fine in 1956, so why change it now?
>--
>_________________________________
>Truth is a pathless land. --- Krishnamurti
>-------------------------------------------------
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