> A Man's Diary > > > > Dear Diary, > > I never quite figured out why the sexual urges of > men & women differ > so much. And I never have figured out the whole > Venus and Mars thing. > Ihave never > figured out why men think with their head and women > with their heart. > I have never figured out why the sexual desire gene > gets thrown into a > state > of turmoil, when it hears the words "I do." > > One evening last week, my wife and I were getting > into bed. Well, the > passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says > "I don't feel like > it, I just want you to hold me." I said > "WHAT????!!!" So she says the > words that > every husband on the planet dreads to hear..."You > must not be in tune > with > my emotional needs as a woman." I am thinking "what > was her first clue?" > I finally realize that nothing was going to happen > that night so I went > to > sleep. > > The very next day, we went shopping at a big, > unnamed dept. store... I > walked around with her while she tried on three > different very > expensive outfits She couldn't decide which one to > take so I told her to > take all > three. She> wanted matching shoes, I said "lets get > a pair for each > outfit." We > went to the jewelry dept. where she gets a pair of > diamond earrings. > Let me tell you ... she was so excited. She must > have thought I was > One wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think > she was testing me > because > she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't > even know how to play > tennis. > I think I threw her for a loop when I said it was > OK. She was almost > sexually excited from all of this. You should have > seen her face when > she said "I think this is all dear, lets go to the > cash register." > > I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out > "No honey, I don't > feel like buying all of this stuff now." You should > have seen her > face...it > went completely blank. I then said "Really honey! I > just want you to > HOLD > this stuff for a while." And just when she had this > look like she was > going to > kill me I added, "You must not be in tune with my > financial needs as a > man." > > I figure that I won't be having sex again until > sometime after the > spring of > 2008. > >
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