Dear Lord, I see hurricanes, earthquakes, tsunami, and potential flu pandemic. I am so thankful, Lord, that in your wisdom, you made sure we didn't do something stupid like let money sit around unused, waiting for these little events. It just gives me a special feeling to know that Katrina and Rita won't be taking funds that were earmarked for the more important holy war on terrorism. I shudder to think, Dear Lord, that we might have thrown good money at saving poor, illiterate people in New Orleans, instead of applying it to the same in Iraq. Haven't people been paying attention to the news: it's obvious the citizens of New Orleans are nothing but criminals and druggies who chose to live in a flood plain. Why supplement their degenerate lifestyles when there are terrorists to slay? I know You punished them for their wicked ways, Lord, and that you want us to save the heathen Muslims in the Middle East and turn them from their heathen Muslim ways. That's more important. I know, Sweet God, that in a democracy, it's better to let citizens ante up the funds to rebuild and resupply flood victims, rather than expecting governmental agencies to spend their time doing it. Help the misguided, O God, who are worried that we don't have facilities, processes, or stockpiles to battle some flu bug that may never happen. I know that You will send your Archangel to protect this Christian nation, which You favor above all others. I know that we may lose a few million Americans, but if so, it will by Thy will to punish the sinners. I know that only sinners die in natural disasters, which are merely Thee stretching Thine powerful arms across this sinful firmament.
Thank you for showing us the futility of spending money trying to stockpile flu vaccines when we should be focused on killing all those insurgents that Saddam was obviously hiding in his basements. Lord, please send your grace to all those naysaying, week-kneed liberals complaining because we haven't wasted money on alternative fuel sources. Help them understand that the world and its resources were given by Thee to America to use in our Holy Causes. Open their eyes, O Omnipotent One, to the fact that there's plenty of oil in Alaska, which is mostly empty unused space anyway. And if things get bad, I know that Thou will instruct us to invade another sinful country and take their oil, helping them in humility and compassion use their resources more effectively, as You intended (are you paying attention, Chavez, you heathen?) As I lie down to sleep every night, I pray to thee God, to remember this sinful world. I think on the leaders You have sent us and say "Lord, I must have done something to deserve this. Please tell me, just what did I do to deserve leaders like this? Please let me know O Lord--I promise not to do it again!" [Non-text portions of this message have been removed] ------------------------ Yahoo! Groups Sponsor --------------------~--> Get fast access to your favorite Yahoo! Groups. Make Yahoo! your home page http://us.click.yahoo.com/dpRU5A/wUILAA/yQLSAA/LRMolB/TM --------------------------------------------------------------------~-> Yahoo! Groups Links <*> To visit your group on the web, go to: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/scifinoir2/ <*> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] <*> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to: http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/