The short review:
I like good romantic comedies, but not badly written and cliched ones. Utterly
forgettable and unengaging, this movie was torture. Not one genuine moment of
emotion in the whole picture. Well, maybe one, but it comes from the one
character who didn't get enough screen time. Boring as heck, and you care not a
whit about anyone. I'll put it this way: Forty-five minutes in, my wife--who
really digs romantic comedies--turned to me and whispered, "This movie is
awful. I think it's actually *worse* than 'The English Patient'". You must
understand that she hated "The English Patient" so much she wanted everyone in
the film to get killed just so it could be over, and so it could add some
excitement. Save the ducats and go pull out your copy of "Love Jones", "Two
Can Play That Game", or "Sleepless in Seattle" instead.
Oh yeah: Kevin Smith should stick to directing, not acting. And wear some
clothes. And get a tan...
The long review:
Unlike a lot of guys, I dont have a problem seeing romantic comedies.
Sleepless in Seattle, Love Jones, Brown Sugarseen em all, and would see
them all again. Sure they can be predictable, but they can also be fun, and,
dare I say, romantic. But on the flipside, they can also be done so badly that
watching them feels like slow torture. Such is the case with Catch and
Release.
The film starts with a devastated Gray Wheeler (Jennifer Garner), reeling from
the death of her fiancé in an accident. So sudden was it that wedding flowers
are still being delivered to the house where the mourners are gathered. In a
voiceover, Gray relates how lost and confused she is. The only thing thats
helping her get through it is her husbands lifelong buddies. Well, two of his
buddies, at least. The third is a long-absent would-be movie mogul whos moved
to California to seek his fortune. Hes just come back to Colorado for the
funeral, but unfortunately Gray encounters him in one of those movie quickies
with a stranger hes just met at the memorial. Disgusted, she tells him later
I never understood what he saw in you!
In other words, I hate you, so of course well be lovers later.
And of course, they do become lovers. And of course, they struggle with their
feelings for each other. And of course, we have long boring voiceovers as Gray
works through her feelings. And of course, Gray discovers that her fiancé had
a Big Secret: he was rich, and secretly supporting a lover and child. This puts
in doubt everything they were, and everything she thinks she is. And of course,
her friends are there to help by being wacky and comical and complicated, and
were expected to laugh and cry and cheer as the whole gang tries to put its
life back together.
Oh yeahand the fishing rod business Gray's fiance and his buddy had figure
into this whole journey. Something about fishing being a metaphor for life, or
searching or something like that. Hence the title, Catch and Release. Yawn.
This is a tired and boring movie. Theres nothing engaging, interesting, or
insightful about the film. Theres no wit, no sparkle, no fun. No romance. The
characters are all forgettable, clichéd, and two dimensional, particularly
Kevin Smith, who plays the screwy-but-caring good guy. Smith spends all his
time looking unkempt, eating twenty-four seven, and dropping pithy sayings he
writes for his herbal tea company. Hes like a low-rent John Belushi doing the
Funny Fat Guy role. Juliette Lewis is possibly even worse as the quirky,
scattered New Age Fruitcake, arguably the most overused movie cliché outside
the Hooker-with-a-Heart-of-Gold. You know the one: the lady who serves
horrible vegetarian meals to meat eaters, yammers on about spiritual cleansing
and auras, is studying to be a massage therapist, seems incapable of caring for
her Cute Kid, but who is really a good mom and a good person at heart? Double
yawn.
And then theres Jennifer Garner, she of the cute smiles and dimples, who seems
condemned to play nice girl roles where she can pout and cry and make the
audience love her. Its not that Garners a bad actress. Actually Im not sure
what kind she is, because the role she has is so bland. Gray never really feels
convincing in her sorrow. She seems to cry on cue, as if we can hear the
director yelling Sad moment!, but the next shes making out with the Bad Boy
friend. She gives us voiceovers about the pain shes feeling, but we never
really see heror any of her friends, for that mattercome together and really
*mourn* her fiancé. Instead we get a disjointed flick of Movie Moments: the
Scandalous Sex, the Improper Kiss, the Fat Guy Pratfall, the I Hate and Love
You Reveal, the Secret Uncovered, the He Acts Bad but is Actually a Cute Kid,
the Act Crazy in a Bar to Dull the Painand on and on. Triple yawn.
Catch and Release feels like it was written by committee. Its one long
collection of predictable and unoriginal scenes that together add up to less
than the sum of their parts, a romantic comedy thats neither romantic nor
comedic. Usually my biggest problem in writing a movie review is that the
review is too long. With a great movie I cant say enough about the good
things. With a bad movie, I cant say enough about all the bad things. But
when a movies just tedious and forgettable, its actually a chore caring
enough to write anything about it. Frankly, less than one week after watching
the film, I cant remember the name of a single one of the characters. Now as
soon as I can forget the plot and the money I wasted on it, things will be okay.
My Grade: C-
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