OT- friday Humour
Men and women on Earth die and go to Heaven God comes and says - "I want the Men to form two queues, One line for the Men - Who dominated Their Women, and One for the Men - Who were dominated by Their Women. Also, I want all the Women to go away so that no Man and Woman can talk. "Next time God comes back, the Women are gone, and there are two lines. The line for the Men who were dominated by Their Women is 100 miles long, And in the line of men who dominated their women there is only one man. God gets mad and says, "You Men should be Ashamed of Yourselves. I created you in My Image, and you were all whipped by your mates. Look at the only one of my Sons who stood up and made Me Proud. Learn from him! "Tell them, My Son, how did you manage to be the only One in this line?" The man replies, "I don't know, My Wife told me to stand here...!" Have a nice weekend Regards Rajesh Important notice: This e-mail and any attachment there to contains corporate proprietary information. If you have received it by mistake, please notify us immediately by reply e-mail and delete this e-mail and its attachments from your system. Thank You. ___ UNSUBSCRIBE or access ARSlist Archives at www.arslist.org attend wwrug10 www.wwrug.com ARSlist: "Where the Answers Are"
OT- Friday Humour
Have Nice weekend A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for several years. One night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him that she was pregnant. Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child. If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18. She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born. To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write "Spaghetti" on the back. He would then arrange for child support payments to begin. One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife. Honey, she said, "You received a very strange post card today." "Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it," he said. The wife obeyed, and watched as her husband read the card, turned white and fainted. On the card was written: "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti -- Two with meatballs, one without." Two old men decide they are close to their last days and decide to have a last night on the town. After a few drinks, they end up at the local brothel. The madam takes one look at the two old geezers and whispers to her manager, "Go up to the first two bedrooms and put an inflated doll in each bed. These two are so old and drunk, I'm not wasting two of my girls on them. They won't know the difference." The manager does as he is told and the two old men go upstairs and take care of their business. As they are walking home the first man says, "You know, I think my girl was dead!" "Dead?" says his friend, "Why do you say that?" "Well, she never moved or made a sound all the time I was loving her." his friend says, "could be worse I think mine was a witch." "A witch, why the hell would you say that?" "Well, I was making love to her, kissing her on the neck and I gave her a little bite, then she farted and flew out the window." Important notice: This e-mail and any attachment there to contains corporate proprietary information. If you have received it by mistake, please notify us immediately by reply e-mail and delete this e-mail and its attachments from your system. Thank You. ___ UNSUBSCRIBE or access ARSlist Archives at www.arslist.org attend wwrug10 www.wwrug.com ARSlist: "Where the Answers Are"
Re: OT: Friday Humour
EXCELLENT ___ UNSUBSCRIBE or access ARSlist Archives at www.arslist.org Platinum Sponsor: www.rmsportal.com ARSlist: "Where the Answers Are"
OT: Friday Humour
*Investment Ideas!* If you purchased $1,00,000 of Delta Airlines stock 1 year ago, you would have $ 4,900 today. If you purchased $1,00,000 of AIG stock 1 year ago, you would have $ 3,300 today. If you purchased $1,00,000 of Lehman Brothers stock 1 year ago, you would have $ 0.0 today. But, if you purchased $1,00,000 worth of beer 1 year ago, drank all the beer, returned the aluminum cans for a recycling refund, you would have $ 21,400!!! Think Smart!! * *** * * ___ UNSUBSCRIBE or access ARSlist Archives at www.arslist.org Platinum Sponsor: www.rmsportal.com ARSlist: "Where the Answers Are" <>
OT - Friday Humour
The Smartest Dog Ever As a butcher is shooing a dog from his shop, he sees $10 and a note in his mouth, reading: "10 lamb chops, please." Amazed, he takes the money, puts a bag of chops in the dog's mouth, and quickly closes the shop. He follows the dog and watches him wait for a green light, look both ways, and trot across the road to a bus stop. The dog checks the timetable and sits on the bench. When a bus arrives, he walks around to the front and looks at the number, then boards the bus. The butcher follows, dumbstruck. As the bus travels out into the suburbs, the dog takes in the scenery. After awhile he stands on his back paws to push the "stop" button, then the butcher follows him off. The dog runs up to a house and drops his bag on the stoop. He goes back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself -Whap! - Against the door. He does this again and again. No answer. So he jumps on a wall, walks around the garden, beats his head against a window, jumps off, and waits at the front door. A big guy opens it and starts cursing and pummeling the dog. The butcher runs up screams at the guy: "What the hell are you doing? This dog's a genius!" The owner responds, "Genius, no way! It's the second time this week he's forgotten his key!" -- CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE This message and any included attachments are from Cerner Corporation and are intended only for the addressee. The information contained in this message is confidential and may constitute inside or non-public information under international, federal, or state securities laws. Unauthorized forwarding, printing, copying, distribution, or use of such information is strictly prohibited and may be unlawful. If you are not the addressee, please promptly delete this message and notify the sender of the delivery error by e-mail or you may call Cerner's corporate offices in Kansas City, Missouri, U.S.A at (+1) (816)221-1024. ___ UNSUBSCRIBE or access ARSlist Archives at www.arslist.org Platinum Sponsor: www.rmsportal.com ARSlist: "Where the Answers Are"
