Silence is the universal refuge, the sequel to all dull discourses
and all foolish acts, a balm to our every chagrin, as welcome after
satiety as after disappointment. ~ Henry David Thoreau
On Wed, Feb 2, 2011 at 12:47 PM, sherri sonnier slsonn...@gmail.com wrote:
but some of the reaction seemed to be just as unprofessional
ABSOLUTELY. I have formed some not so positive impressions about several
posters based on their responses. I never seem to see the email that starts
the exchanges, but I sure do see the rest.
On Wed, Feb 2, 2011 at 8:48 AM, Levi Wallach l...@dvdmon.com wrote:
I find it fascinating watching these exchanges take place. I used to code
with Cold Fusion way back (99-'02) but haven't touched it since, but
somehow
remained a member of jobs-talk, but not of the general CF-Talk, probably
because this list gets generally little traffic. So I guess I am getting
only half of the conversation. It's obvious to me that Michael has annoyed
a lot of people and doesn't seem to care, but at the same time other
members
are so affected by messages that otherwise seem benign, that it seems the
whole situation has devolved into one that isn't on a professional level
but
a personal one. I wonder, whatever your opinion of Michael is, what good
does it do to vent about it in a public forum, other than to blow of some
steam (while at the same time presenting an unprofessional/negative aspect
of your own demeanor)?
Being on the Internet for abour 20 years now (and BBS's before that) has
taught me a few things, some of them certainly useless, but a couple of
them
hopefully more useful. One is that it's hard to guage the tone of someone
and easy to misunderstand meaning online due to lack of body language, etc.
Because of this I always try to assume the best of intentions. Even if it's
hard to see those positive intentions, I often try to keep from responding
immediately myself if my reaction is strong and negative. Waiting until
that
initial emotional reaction has subsided, I can often think much more
clearly
and respond in a way that is more constructive than reactive.
This is not to say that Michael didn't act unprofessionally, but some of
the
reaction seemed to be just as unprofessional. I did not see most of his
messages on this list (cf-jobs-talk) that I can remember, but if I was
seeing them on another list and got annoyed, I'd have either - 1) written
the moderator to express my concerns, or 2) sent Michael a private note
to express my concerns. Many of you may have done these things to no
avail,
but my final approach would have had 100% success: 3) create an email
rule/filter to remove his messages. It's amazing to me that despite
filtering technology like this being around for 20+ years, that ppl would
still rather get into long arguments than simply opt out of a certain
person's messages or discussion topics. This on a forum of highly
tech-savvy folks.
Since none of you probably recognize my name, it should be evident that I
never post on these lists, and probably won't again for a while if ever,
but
something moved me to post about this (and perhaps I'll regret it later),
so
that perhaps some perspective from a semi-objective party might be useful
in
some way to a few of you. I know there's some irony in the fact I'm
suggesting people not speak out here about these things and then doing just
that, but just know there have been incidents in the past that I've
considered commenting on but haven't, so pershaps this is just my one
'gaff'
that proves my general practices are better than this exception ;-) This is
really the first time if not ever, than in many years (and memory) that I
recall posting about an issue like this. I certainly understand annoyance
at unprofessional behavior and just idiotic behavior, but I also have
experienced a lot of real-life passive aggressive stuff so I sometimes
wonder whether some of the vitriol I see online is due to people who feel
powerless (or make themselves powerless) to do something about situations
in
real life that they are annoyed at/offended by/etc. and so this gets
transferred to a place they feel a bit more empowered to speak out? Or
maybe that's just pop psyche BS, who knows.
Anyway, I'll shut up now and hope no one takes this personally (although
I'm
a bit pessimistic :-( ).
On Tue, Feb 1, 2011 at 7:42 PM, Phillip Vector vec...@mostdeadlygame.com
wrote:
Larry, Thanks for the tip. :) I didn't know about this site. :)
On Tue, Feb 1, 2011 at 4:39 PM, Larry C. Lyons larrycly...@gmail.com
wrote:
Use justcoldfusionjobs.com
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