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Hi List ! A little late, but soooo funny....copied from todays CD-List. Lisa Pedersen Cedar City UT. where it is clear, kind of warm, and no snow. > Horse List of New Year's Resolutions > 1. I CAN walk and poop at the same time. I can, I > can, I can > 2. I will NOT stop and poop or urinate every time > I pass the same spot in the arena. > 3. I will NOT leave when my rider falls off. > 4. My stall is NOT my litter box. When I have free > access to my paddock, I will NOT > go back inside to pee. > 5. I will NOT roll in streams or try to roll when my human is on my back. > 6. I will NOT leap over large nonexistent > obstacles when the whim strikes. > 7. I will NOT walk faster on the way home than I > did on the way out. > 8. I promise NOT to swish my tail while my human > is cleaning my back feet. > 9. I promise also NOT to choose that particular > time to answer nature's call. > 10. I will NOT bite my farrier's butt just > because it's there. > 11. I will NOT confuse my human's blond hair for > really soft hay. > 12. I will NOT wipe green slime down the back of > my human's white shirt. > 13. I will NOT blow my nose on my human. > 14. I will NOT try to mooch goodies off every > human within 1 mile radius. > 15. I will NOT lay totally flat out in my stall > with my eyes glazed over and my legs > straight out and pretend I can't hear my > human frantically screaming "Are you > asleep?" > 16. I will NOT chase the ponies into the electric > fence to see if it is on. > 17. I will promise NEVER to dump the wheelbarrow > of manure over while my human > is mucking my stall.> > 18. I will NOT grab my lead rope in my mouth and > attempt to lead myself. > 19. I will NOT have an attitude problem. I won't, > I won't, I won't! > 20. I will NOT pull my new shoes off the very next > day just to prove that I can. > 21. I am neither a beaver nor a carpenter. I promise I won't eat or remodel > the > barn or the new fences. > 22. I am NOT a Shin'a'in Battlesteed. I will not > act like one. > 23. I WILL forgive my human for the very bad > haircut, even though I Look like a > freak. > 24. I accept that not every carrot is for me. > 25. I will NOT do the Arab Teleport Trick when a > bad/naughty/awful Horsasaurus > Monster breathes at me. > 26. I will NOT jump in the air, turn 180 degrees > every time I see a deer. > 27. I will understand that deer are NOT > carnivorous. > 28. I will NOT shy at familiar objects just for > fun. > 29. I will NOT bite the butt of the horse in > front of me during the trail ride just > to say "Hi". > 30. I WILL put my ears forward and cooperate when > it comes to photos. >