g_b Family pressure on us disgusting: Indian gays

[sunny kapoor]

New Delhi, May 24 Homosexuality is a criminal offence in India, but many gays
believe that a change in the law will do no good to them unless society starts
accepting them and stops putting pressurise on them to conform.

According to Ranjan, 43, who works with an NGO in the capital, family pressure
in India is "disgusting".

"Family pressure in India is disgusting. As a gay, I am not supposed to
disrespect my family reputation even though I am feeling miserable from inside,"
Ranjan said.

"The law can't make any difference till we help ourselves and get support from
society and our family. There is a lot of discrimination against us and no law 
can change that attitude of people towards us. The need of the hour is to 
garner support from society to live a normal life like other human beings do," 
said Ranjan."

There is no official data on the country's gay population, according to UNAIDS 
officials. The Indian Penal Code holds homosexual acts as an offence, with 
Section 377 providing punishment up to life imprisonment for indulging in them.

For 44-year-old prince Manavendra Singh Gohil from Rajpipla in Gujarat, it 
wasn't easy to disclose the fact that he was gay, but after a failed marriage 
that lasted 15 months, he decided that succumbing to peer pressure would do no 
good to his own life.

"Initially, I didn't have the courage to be open about my identity but as I 
came out of a failed marriage, I decided not to take it any more. After this, 
my mother had almost disowned me for some time. But slowly everyone around me 
accepted me," Gohil explained.

"What I realised was that by getting married I was not only failing myself but 
also my wife and my family. Being a gay is no threat to our values and 
tradition. Most of us shy away from accepting our selves because of the dilemma 
of social acceptance," he added.

History lecturer and gay activist Rajarshi Chakrabarty said on phone from 
Murshidabad in West Bengal: "There is so much struggle and stigma associated 
with homosexuality that it becomes difficult for a gay to survive."

"According to society, you should get married at a certain age, whatever your 
sexual orientation is because that is a rule you have to follow to gain 
acceptance in society. Unfortunately, this leads to pressure on homosexuals 
which in turn leads to fights and confusion within."

Sunil Menon, 43, an anthropologist and founder of Sahodaran that deals with 
male sexual health projects, says one should never feel guilty about being gay.

"The guilt cycle starts from childhood when he is confused about his feelings 
and does not get the opportunity to explore who he is and come to terms with 
it," Menon explained.

"People take medicines and run after psychiatrists to change this nature but 
you can't do anything about it because you are born with it. It is part of a 
person's personality and he should accept it rather than focussing on changing 
it," he added.

Menon also believes that importance should be given to sex education in schools 
and colleges to raise awareness about the issue, especially among people from a 
low strata of society so that they don't feel lost and save themselves from 
verbal and emotional abuse.

Said Ranjan: "It's not just society, the problem also lies with us because we 
are scared and have fear within us.

"It took me 30 years to accept myself as I am, so how could I expect my family 
to understand me and my emotions overnight? It is a long and difficult process."

Today Ranjan is happily living with his partner and their parents come to visit 
them.

g_b The play focuses on the gay lifestyle, which presents a problem in India

[sunny kapoor]

Tri-City native Doric Wilson found his writing niche in New York City a 
half-century ago.

Though
his playwriting has been well received on off-Broadway productions for
many years, one of his plays is packing a punch half a world away. 
A
Perfect Relationship is having a stirring effect on the human rights
movement in New Delhi, India, where the production opened about a year
ago.
The play focuses on the gay lifestyle, which presents a
problem in India. Archaic Indian penal code makes it a crime to engage
in homosexual activity, explained the play's director, Sameer Thakur,
in an e-mail to the Herald this week.
"We chose to bring this play to the Indian stage, especially at this
time, because it is relevant in the context of a litigation at the
Delhi high court against section 377 of the Indian penal code," he
said. 
In addition, the gay rights movement in India has picked up momentum over the 
last few years, he added.
"We
had our first gay pride in Delhi last year and the second one is
scheduled for June 29," Thakur said. "There have been other plays and
even Bollywood films with gay characters in them. However, most
portrayals of gay persons have been stereotyped, comic roles that the
audience has always laughed at rather than Mr. Wilson's play that
provided us with the opportunity to portray people with whom urban,
educated audiences in Delhi could identify with."
Wilson is thrilled his play has found a new audience in India.
"It
is humbling to realize that a 10-year-old kid who organized his first
plays with his cousins in a barn on his grandfather's Plymouth ranch 60
years later would have a script that is actually affecting human rights
in a country halfway around the planet," Wilson told the Herald on
Thursday. 
Wilson couldn't resist making this humorous comparison: "Makes me sort of a 
Benton County Harriet Beecher Stowe."
Wilson
has become a staple in New York City theater, having several of his
plays performed in the off-off-Broadway district. He's also the
co-founder of the theater group The Other Side of Silence, known more
commonly as TOSOS.
He was honored last year by New York's theater community with the 2007 
Innovative Theater Award for Artistic Achievement.
Wilson said A Perfect Relationship is one of his least political plays. 
"It's
about relationships," he said. "But it seems relationships between same
genders turns out to be the most political of all! How empty people's
lives must be for them to waste so much of their time on this planet
hating other people.
"I know my mom and my old Kennewick High
teacher, Miss Larson (who was the inspiration behind Wilson's writing
career), would be proud," Wilson said. 
Thakur couldn't be happier with the success of Wilson's play and it's impact on 
Indian theatergoers.
"The audiences come away with having enjoyed a comedy in which the characters 
happen to be gay," Thakur said. 
The
largely heterosexual audiences don't appear to feel disconnected to the
play's characters despite their lifestyle differences, he added.
Most
importantly, the director and Wilson are hoping to hear good news in
the near future from India's high court regarding the outdated penal
code.
"We are hoping to hear a favorable verdict from the high
court to abolish the old law," Thakur said. "In the meantime, the
theater is full, and the audiences are roaring for more. For us it's a
personal satisfaction of speaking our minds in the best way we can."  
Love
Sunny



  

g_b Fwd: Announcing Delhi Queer Pride 2009! [1 Attachment]

[Aditya Bondyopadhyay]

 *Please forward widely*

*Delhi Queer Pride '09*

Announcing the Delhi Queer Pride '09! For the second year running queer
people, friends, and allies take this message to the streets!

Queer Pride is a celebration. It is about loving who we are, whether
lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, hijra or straight, and affirming
everyone's right to be respected.

*Starts at 5:30pm, Sunday, June 28th, 2009, at the corner of Barakhamba Road
and Tolstoy Marg.*

We'll gather at the Corner of Barakhamba Road and Tolstoy Marg at 5:00 pm.
The Parade commences at 5:30, down Tolstoy Marg to Jantar Mantar, where we
will have more celebrating!


Delhi Queer Pride is an open forum. Anyone - gay, bisexual, transgender,
lesbian or straight can join. Please email *delhiqueerpr...@gmail.com *to be
part of organising Delhi Queer Pride '09. For more information please visit
delhiqueerpride.blogspot.com

The Queer Pride is organised by the LGBT community for the LGBT community
and allies, and not by any organisations, and we hope that it can continue
to be entirely funded by individual donations from queer and queer friendly
people from India and elsewhere. To find out how you can donate and
contribute to Queer Pride '09, please email *finance.delhipr...@gmail.com*.
***

g_b The GB Party at Tequila Lounge on 30th May 09 !!!!

[Dee]

The GB Party at Tequila Lounge on 30th May 09  

This week, get set to rock as the GB party shifts to an exciting new venue in 
Mumbai’s biggest suburb, Andheri. Located amidst the famous multiplexes and 
studios of Lokhandwala.
.
Tequila Lounge..this newly opened place is certainly a new hangout for the 
suburbans..huge area with one of the biggest bars in townthe place is 
rocking with a good dance floor.. The venue comes with a very happening DJ who 
has rocked the city's glitterati and is set to do the same for the GB crowd.

Wherever you may be, block your calender this Saturday for the GB’s Tequila 
Lounge party at Andheri. It promises to be a night to remember. 

Date: Saturday, 30th May 09
Time: 9 pm - 1 am. 
Cover Charge: Rs 650 before 10pm and Rs 700 after 10pm - per person 
(Please note – NO CREDIT CARDS) 

Address: 
Tequila Lounge,
Above NextGen Banquets, Oberoi Complex,
Opp Sab TV Lane,
Next to Lotus Business Park, Off New Link Rd,
Andheri W, Mumbai - 400053. 
Its one lane before the Fun Republic lane and has the ALL Plus Size Store at 
the corner of the lane and opposite Citi Mall. 

Please note that you have to be above the age of 21 to attend 
Please carry proof of age with you: a driving license, college identity card, 
etc. 

The Cover Charge includes: In-house DJ and a dance floor; delicious snacks; 
Drinks with mixers,
Dinner will not be served. 

Some don'ts: 
GB, as a support group, has created this comfort/safe space for gays. Many 
people at the event may be "newbies" (those still coming to terms with their 
sexuality and/or those who have mustered the courage to come to such an event 
for the first time). We request you to be 
Sensitive to the comfort levels of others and to behave and dress accordingly. 

No dark rooms and no sex on the premises; if found indulging in any "hanky 
panky" you shall be asked to leave the party. 

Use of any illegal substance is prohibited and NO Smoking on the premises

A special REQUEST: During and after the party please DO NOT gather outside the 
venue. The management has requested us to ensure that, in the middle of the 
night, the peace of the neighbourhood is not disturbed. 

A few dos: 
Have a smashing time. 
Carry your Alcoholic Drinks Permit. 

This event is organized by: http://www.gaybombay.org. 
Right of admission reserved.