g_b WTF India: Being gay in India – A sin or freedom of choice?

[modera...@gaybombay.in [gay_bombay]]

http://www.india.com/stream/wtf-india-being-gay-in-india-a-sin-or-freedom-of-choice-118614/

 WTF India: Being gay in India – A sin or freedom of choice? 
http://www.india.com/stream/wtf-india-being-gay-in-india-a-sin-or-freedom-of-choice-118614/
 
http://www.india.com/stream/wtf-india-being-gay-in-india-a-sin-or-freedom-of-choice-118614/
 
 

g_b Watch: First gay hug, a homophobic experiment

[modera...@gaybombay.in [gay_bombay]]

Watch: First gay hug, a homophobic experiment http://www .deccanchr onicle.com 
/140810/li festyle-of fbeat/arti cle/watch- first-gay- hug-homoph obic-exper 
iment

g_b Gay man raped by mother, lesbians by cousins to cure homosexuality

[modera...@gaybombay.in [gay_bombay]]

Gay man raped by mother, lesbians by cousins to cure homosexuality 
IndiaToday.in http://indiatoday.intoday.in/author/IndiaToday.in/1.html  New 
Delhi , June 2, 2015 | UPDATED 20:00 IST
 A few days after Mail Today revealed how some doctors in Delhi used electric 
shocks and hormonal treatment among other things to cure homosexuality, news 
has come of a boy being raped by his own mother to cure him of his 
homosexuality.
 The case of the boy who was forced to have sex with his mother was reported 
from Bangalore. This came to light when Deepthi Tadanki began work on the 
subject of corrective rape and decided to maek a documentary to create 
awareness about the issue.
 
In another case, a homosexual girl who was having an affair with another woman 
was raped by her cousin.
 Reports reveal that parents with the help of cousins, brothers are using such 
measures to cure homosexuality.
 



 Families feel that the only way to help their straight kids get out of this is 
having sex and mostly cousins are roped in to carry out the henious act.
 All this is a part of corrective rape, a hate crime, which aims at correcting 
the sexual orientation of a person by rape as a measure . It is popular in 
South Africa and families plays an important role in it.
 

g_b Section 377: 7 booked for blackmailing doc, who also faces arrest

[gay_bombay moderator modera...@gaybombay.in [gay_bombay]]

http://www.firstpost.com/living/section-377-7-booked-blackmailing-doc-also-faces-arrest-1584263.html?utm_source=FP_HP_CATEGORYRANK


Six months after the Supreme Court upheld Section 377 of the IPC, which
criminalises consensual sexual relations between same sex individuals, 7
youths have been booked in Bangalore under the law for trying to blackmail
a doctor with whom four of the accused had sex.


According to a report in the Bangalore Mirror

the Central Crime branch arrested the seven under Section 377 and "also
filed a complaint against them for blackmailing and extorting Rs 16 lakh"
from the doctor.


The report says that "Tilaknagar police have registered a case under
section 377 (unnatural sex) and 384 (extortion) of the IPC against Suhas,
20, a resident of Avalahalli; Diwakar, 19, of Parvathipuram; Madhu, 19, of
Hanumanthnagar; Nikesh, 22, of Dwarakanagar; Vishwa, 21, of Hanumanthnagar;
Mahesh, 19, of Basavanagudi; and Vikash, 21, of Gavipura-Guttahalli."


According to the story, one of the youths Suhas first had a sexual
encounter with the doctor (who is a married man with children) and later
his friends convinced Suhas to videotape it to blackmail the doctor.


The report also adds that the youth "later masqueraded as policemen and
media reporters to further threaten the doctor into coughing up huge sums
of money." The doctor gave in as he feared the videotape would be made
public. The report also alleges that three other accused also had sex with
the doctor.
[image: Representational Image. AFP]


Representational Image. AFP


While the blackmailers have been caught, the police are also exploring if
the doctor should be booked. A Crime Branch source also told the
paper, "Technically, the doctor is also an accused in the case since he
allegedly 'pursued' the remaining accused and convinced them to engage in
consensual homosexual sex." DCP (Crime) Abhishek Goyal told the paper that
if the "investigations prove it (the sex) was consensual, the doctor will
be booked."


The story brings to light the dangers of the Section 377 law, especially
post the SC verdict, which made it criminal to have homosexual sex in
India. The SC had noted in its verdict at the time

that
while there was evidence to show "the section is misused by police
authorities and others", it did not see it as reason enough for strike it
down.  The court had stated, "a minuscule fraction of the country’s
population constitute lesbians, gays, bisexuals or transgenders and in last
more than 150 years less than 200 persons have been prosecuted (as per the
reported orders) for committing offence under Section 377 IPC and this
cannot be made sound basis for declaring that section ultra vires the
provisions of Articles 14, 15 and 21 of the Constitution."


Minuscule fraction argument aside, the SC had overlooked the fact that by
upholding the verdict, it would continue to expose gay people to the risk
of blackmail and possible police action.  In this particular case, it is
evident that the married doctor was forced to keep his sexuality hidden,
for which he ended up getting blackmailed. The doctor clearly has some
explaining to do to his family but that is between him and his family.
However even unmarried men have been targeted by blackmailers threatening
to reveal their sexuality to neighbours and family members.


This case presents an especially double-edged sword. The blackmailers are
being rightly prosecuted for extortion. But by adding Section 377 to the
charges the police are focusing not just on the illegality of blackmail
(which would be true whether the sexual encounters were heterosexual or
homosexual) but also on the actual sexual act which should be incidental to

the extortion charge. That shows why someone like the doctor would be wary

about going to the police in the first place because he could be ensnared
in his own complaint. And that is the potential for the misuse of Section
377 which is often underestimated.








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g_b First gay support group comes up in Assam

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First gay support group comes up in Assam
Gaurav Das,TNN | Jul 13, 2014, 11.29 AM IST


A
A
GUWAHATI: On Saturday, a group of young women announced the formation of
'Sukia', Assam's first collective organization working to support the
region's LGBT (Lesbian Gay Bisexual and Transgender) community. The group
is organizing a three-day national event in Guwahati next month to create
awareness about the rights of homosexuals in India.


The national event is to be held from August 8 to 10 with the help of other
national and international organizations. The programme will include
debates, discussions and the showcasing of regional, national and
international films in the region's first 'Queer Film Festival'.


Discussing the limited awareness of homosexuality in India, Meenakshi
Bujorbaruah, one of the founders of Sukia, said, "We want to reach out to
the people at the grass root level. There is too much social stigma
attached to homosexuality, and gay people fear to disclose them due to
this."


In February, the young women, along with some volunteers, had organized the
first gay pride parade in the northeast. Sukia also led the protest against
the Supreme Court's reinstatement of Section 377 last December, a
regressive decision which re-criminalized homosexuality.


"So far, we are a non-registered collective organization working towards
creating public visibility and sensitization concerning gay issues, said
Bitopi Dutta, another co founder. Sukia's main aim is to encourage more
active participation in the organization from across the region, especially
from the grass root level.


However, working towards an issue so controversial and socially tabooed,
the women have also faced intimidation from right wing groups. Prior to the
pride parade in February, one of the organizations with which they were
working had its office vandalized by some right wing conservatives.


"It is a collective of mostly young women and others to take forward LGBT
activism in the region. Sukia envisages to one day make its mark in forming
a strong LGBT mass movement, creating a gay friendly Assam," said Gayatri
Bhuyan, another co-founder, undeterred by the obstacles in their path to
bring about a more conscious and accepting society.


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g_b My Son is Gay' makers start crowd-funding campaign

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My Son is Gay' makers start crowd-funding campaign[image: IANS India
Private Limited/Yahoo India News] By Indo Asian News
Service | IANS India Private Limited/Yahoo India News – 2 hours 6


   -


   Chennai, July 13 (IANS) The makers of the upcoming Hindi film "My Son is
Gay", about the emotional relationship between a mother and her gay son,
have started crowd-funding campaign to raise Rs.4 million to complete the
movie.


"We have already completed 25 percent of the project from the support and
funds from our major sponsors Anil Saxena and Shahnaz Husain Starlight
Herbal Salon. We have opted for crowd-funding because we don't have funds
to complete the rest of the film," film's director Lokesh told IANS.


The team has already raised Rs.30,000 since the launch of the campaign
Friday.


"We have joined hands with a Bangalore based crowd-funding platform called
Fundmydream - http://fundmydream.in - to raise Rs.40 lakh (Rs.4 million).
The response has been amazing so far. We received Rs.30,000 from various
parts of the country in less than 24 hours," he said.


However, Lokesh feels it's extremely challenging to raise funds for a film
that focuses on awareness about Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender
(LGBT) community.


"It's not easy to raise funds for a film like 'My Son is Gay', whose
subject is still considered a taboo in the country. Even mainstream
commercial filmmakers aren't ready to attempt such stories," he said.


"We felt we can't wait for a visionary producer to support and invest in
this story. So, we came out with the crowd-funding idea. It would give us
the control and freedom to deliver the film with artistic value without
getting into regular commercial cinema strategies," he added.


Popular actress Anupama Kumar and newcomer Nakshatra Bagwe play the lead
roles in the film, whose trailer was recently released and it went viral.


To attract contributors for the project, Lokesh has devised a reward
strategy.


"Depending on the amount people contribute, they can become one of the
co-producers, associate producers, executive producers and unit producers
of the film. Funders can also visit the shooting of the second schedule,
meet-and-greet the cast and even dine with them," he said.


"Funders will also get to watch the film before its theatrical release.
There are so many more exciting rewards for all those who contribute," he
added.




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g_b The WHO Wants All Gay Men to Take HIV Prevention Medication

[gay_bombay moderator modera...@gaybombay.in [gay_bombay]]

 The WHO Wants All Gay Men to Take HIV Prevention Medication
Condoms aren't enough: For the first time, the agency is recommending that
all men who have sex with men use prophylactic treatment.
 Cari Romm  Jul 11 2014, 5:34 PM ET
 2
inShare
 More
   A man suffering from HIV/AIDS receives treatment in Siliguri, India.
(Rupak De Chowdhuri/Reuters)


Condoms alone aren’t cutting it, the World Health Organization declared
today, urging all men who have sex with men—regardless of HIV status—to
begin using antiretroviral drugs as a means of protection against the
disease.


Worldwide, a man's risk of HIV infection is 19 times greater if he has sex
with other men than if he doesn't. Taken regularly, the recommended
pre-exposure prophylaxis, or PrEP—a single daily pill containing two
separate medications—is up to 92 percent effective

in protecting its users from HIV. In an update to its HIV prevention
guidelines
,
the WHO estimated that the widespread use of PrEP among gay and bisexual
men could prevent as many as one million new HIV infections over the next
decade.


It’s a number worth celebrating, in theory, but how attainable is it? In
the same guidelines released earlier today, the agency also noted that its
recommendation may be easier said than fulfilled:


“Implementation may prove challenging, however, where access to services
and provision of alternative prevention tools are limited or lacking.
Issues of criminalization, stigma and discrimination, and violence should
be considered during implementation, especially where same-sex behavior is
illegal.”


And as the BBC  reported in
February, homosexuality is a capital crime in five countries and punishable
with imprisonment in 70 more, leaving a sizeable chunk of the world’s
high-risk population unlikely or unable to follow the WHO’s wishes.


In the U.S., PReP has already seen its fair share of controversy. The WHO’s
announcement comes on the heels of a similar policy
 from the Centers for
Disease Control and Prevention, which recommended in May that health
workers offer PrEP, marketed in the U.S. under the brand name Truvada
, to people at
high risk of infection, including gay and bisexual men, injection drug
users, and women who sleep with men of unknown HIV status. Long used by
HIV-positive patients to stave off AIDS, Truvada sparked a bitter debate
after it was approved as a prophylaxis in 2012. While some hailed its
preventive properties, others—including many in the LGBT community—argued
that it would quickly become a risky replacement for condom use.


"If something comes along that's better than condoms, I'm all for it, but
Truvada is not that," Michael Weinstein, president of the AIDS Healthcare
Foundation told the Associated Press

in April. "Let's be honest: It's a party drug.”


Of course, the WHO isn't advocating PrEP as a replacement for condoms, only
as a supplementary measure. But the treatment may be the key to leveling
the prevention playing field, the WHO maintains
,
arguing that “preventive efforts are still lagging too far behind” for
certain high-risk segments of the population. Overall, the number of
HIV-related casualties is going down—thanks in large part to the
antiretroviral medicines used by 13 million people worldwide—but they’re
going down much more slowly for some groups than for others, a gap this new
policy aims to close.




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g_b HIV exploding among gay men, warns WHO

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HIV exploding among gay men, warns WHO
AFP | Jul 12, 2014, 04.28AM ISTGENEVA: HIV infections are rising among gay
men in many parts of the world, the WHO warned on Friday, urging all men
who have sex with men to take antiretroviral drugs to prevent infection.


"We are seeing exploding epidemics," warned Gottfried Hirnschall, who heads
WHO's HIV department. Infection rates are rising again among men who have
sex with men — the group at the epicentre of AIDS pandemic when it first
emerged 33 years ago, he told reporters in Geneva.


While images of skeletal men dying of AIDS in the 1980s pushed the world to
act, a younger generation that has grown up among new treatments that make
it possible to live with HIV are less focused on the disease, he suggested.
Today, this group is 19 times more likely than the general population to be
infected by HIV, Hirnschall said.


In Bangkok for instance, the incidence of HIV among men who have sex with
men stands at 5.7%, compared to less than 1% for the overall population, he
said. In its new recommendations for combatting the HIV/AIDS pandemic,
published today, the UN health agency therefore for the first time
"strongly recommends men who have sex with men consider taking
antiretroviral medicines as an additional method of preventing HIV
infection".


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g_b Are you ready for a gay Romeo and Juliet?

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Are you ready for a gay Romeo and Juliet?
IndiaToday.in  July 8, 2014 | UPDATED 11:42 IST




Ekta Kapoor is a producer who is known to push the envelope. After making a
successful film Ragnini MMS2 with adult film actor Sunny Leone
, Ekta has now
set sights on a making a gay love story titled Romil and Jugal.


The modern day Romeo and Juliet, about two men from warring families in
love was reportedly shelved after it was found to be too racy for Indian
tastes. Reportedly Ekta had shown the story, penned by Anu Menon to some
officials from the Censor Board because she didn't want problems later.
Ekta has now set sights on a making a gay love story titled Romil and Jugal.
This was last year. According to a source now Ishita Moitra, the dialogue
writer of Ragini MMS2 has stepped in to re-work the script in a form which
will be palatable to Indian sensibilities.  It's understandable that the
lead actors will be newcomers because no established actor would agree to
do be part of such a subject.


Danish Aslam, who had earlier directed Break Ke Baad is expected to direct
the film.




Read more at:
http://indiatoday.intoday.in/story/gay-romeo-and-juliet-ekta-kapoor-romil-and-jugal/1/370318.html




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g_b Gays hook up online to avoid harassment by cops

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Gays hook up online to avoid harassment by cops

News18  | Mon Aug 18, 2014 | 10:51 IST


#Uttar Pradesh  Fed up of being
targeted and blackmailed by 'corrupt' police officers, increasing number of
gays in Uttar Pradesh have taken to online gay clubs to connect with each
other and to arrange meetings in more secure locations that would be
impossible for nosy policemen to pinpoint.


28-year-old Aman remembers how when hugged his friend who had come visiting
from Delhi a few months ago, a local cop who had been following them
recorded it on his mobile phone and would use it to extort Rs 15,000 from
the boys on six occasions.


According to a report in *Times of India*
,
it is for this reason that several online membership-only platforms have
mushroomed everywhere, from Ballia to Saharanpur and beyond where the
couples can stay away from the prying eyes of cops. It also comes as a boon
for these men living isolated lives, haunted by perpetual worries of being
found out in small neighbourhoods.


"Unlike in metro cities, there is no social circle of gays living in the
smaller and more conservative parts of India," said Animesh Kumar. "These
clubs have expanded our lives. We can meet like-minded people in any of the
neighbouring districts, and further if we are willing to travel." Saleem
Kidwai, an activist fighting for rights of LGBT community, says the
internet has helped diminish both fear and isolation of homosexuals.
[image: Gays hook up online to avoid harassment by cops]


One such active user, Ritesh, a B.Tech student in Bareilly, was happy to
find others like him in town. He said, "Earlier I used to think I am the
only gay man in my city. But recently I realized there are many more. Gay
men in small towns live a highly closeted life, with hardly any opportunity
to meet partners in everyday life. These (online) groups have made it easy
for us to reach out to one another in the same city itself."


Another user, Sameer, a native of Pilibhit and a BSc student, added:
"Importantly, these forums are not just for gays and lesbians. They are for
all liberals. We love meeting straight people, too. In a country like India
where gay sex is still a criminal offence, their love and support is
crucial to us."


But, hooking up online has its own share of troubles. "Often it is the
police or people belonging to an extortion racket who are active on these
sites. After gaining the trust of a gay man, they either extract money or
seek sexual favour from him," said Deepak, 25, a Saharanpur resident.


On the other hand, outside the internet, life continues to be tougher.


When the influential family of Jafar, 23, who lives in Kamerie tehsil of
Rampur, learnt that their son is gay, they admitted him to drug
rehabilitation centre in Moradabad to "distance him from other abnormal
online friends".


Recalling the tale of horror, Jafar said, "My family thought that if I am
punished in this way, I will become straight. Within three months my health
deteriorated and they asked me to come back when they realized that I would
die soon."


Another gay couple Junaid and Nikky of Rampur, who want to move in
together, said no one will rent an apartment to them. "We have no option
but to live on the outskirt of the city," Nikky said, sadness writ large on
his face."


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g_b The battle for LGBT rights in the workplace advances in the face of an uneasy corporate world

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Workplace | Company tact The battle for LGBT rights in the workplace
advances in the face of an uneasy corporate world


Read more at:
http://www.livemint.com/Leisure/RJZElktbzVL3JNRTKl6w3H/Workplace--Company-tact.html?utm_source=copy





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g_b India talk show changes views on gays

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India talk show changes views on gays
 About 1.7 million people called in to protest the country's anti-gay law
20 October 2014 | By Darren Wee

 [image: Indian actor Aamir Khan said Khan said LGBTI people should not
feel fear or shame in accepting their sexual preference.]
Photo via Facebook


Indian actor Aamir Khan's hit talk show Satyamev Jayate last night tackled
the taboo topic of alternative sexualities, with many viewers saying the
program changed their perception of LGBTI people.


Guests included transgender woman Gazal Dhaliwal and her parents, popular
psychologist Deepak Kashyap and LGBTI activists.


Khan listened sympathetically as his LGBTI guests told their coming out
stories. Several stressed the importance of parental relationships in
shaping their lives and fighting depression and suicidial thoughts.


Khan said LGBTI people should not feel fear or shame in accepting their
sexual preference, which they were born with.


Doctors explained that homosexuality was not a disease and could not be
cured with yoga while lawyers explained the colonial origins of Section 377
of the penal code, which criminalizes gay sex.


The show has a reach of 129.6 million and had a massive impact on viewers.


The hashtag #FreedomForLGBT became the top trending topic globally on
Twitter and 1.7 million missed calls were made to a hotline set up by the
show to protest the anti-gay law.


Veena Chowdary wrote on the show's website, 'In a span of 1 hour you have
changed the way I used to feel about LGBT. Hope your work towards "making
the society better" continues.'


Divyaraj Gadhvi tweeted, 'I pledge today I will never crack jokes on
homosexuals or transgenders. Become sensitive on this issue.'


India recriminalized gay sex in December last year.



Watch the show with English subtitles below:


   - See more at:
http://www.gaystarnews.com/article/india-talk-show-changes-views-gays201014#sthash.mGphZYXO.dpuf




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g_b Nightmare of 377-Bangalore: Woman films husband's gay encounters, police books him under Sec 377

[gay_bombay moderator modera...@gaybombay.in [gay_bombay]]

Section 377 continues to be a nightmare for people of alternative sexual groups 
in Bangalore. Now a young IT engineer has been booked under the law, following 
a complaint lodged by his wife. Prior to this a doctor, 
http://www.firstpost.com/living/section-377-7-booked-blackmailing-doc-also-faces-arrest-1584263.htmlwho
 reportedly had consensual sex with a man, was charged with indulging in 
homosexual acts. The doctor was being blackmailed by the said man and his 
friends and had lodged a compliant with the police seeking action against 
blackmailing and extortion.
 In this case, the wife of a techie employed with a big software company in 
Bangalore, filmed her husband's sexual encounters with men with a spy cam and 
went to the police to lodge a complaint against him. Acting on the complaint 
made the wife, who is a dentist, the police arrested the man not under adultery 
laws, but under Section 377. The wife also named her in-laws in the complaint, 
alleging that they must have known about their son's sexual orientation, yet 
got him married to her.
 The wife told the Bangalore Mirror that she was suspicious of her husband's 
orientation right from the beginning of their marriage as she has spotted pink 
lip gloss in her husband's possession, his affinity for what she called 
underwear with 'girly prints' and effeminate nature.
 Sandeep Patil, Deputy Commissioner of Police (Central) told Bangalore Mirror 
http://www.bangaloremirror.com/bangalore/cover-story/Sec-377-slapped-on-Infosys-techie-after-wife-catches-his-gay-acts-on-spycam/articleshow/44964745.cms,
 "We arrested the techie soon after his wife tendered a complaint, with proof. 
The techie's parents have been booked for cheating the victim, but these 
allegations have to be fully proved before we can arrest them." The police 
insist they were just doing their job and had to take action since the wife had 
shown video proof of the husband having sex with men.
 The Bangalore Mirror report goes to great lengths to give out the identity of 
the husband. Though they have changed his name (claiming that it would protect 
his identity), they have mentioned where he works, they have mentioned his 
birth place and where he grew up. In fact, they have provided so many hints as 
to who he is that anyone working in the same company could trace him in a jiffy.
 The report also talks about the husband's 'womanish traits'. The wife told the 
paper, "His mannerisms and interests were also feminine."
 She told the Bangalore Mirror 
http://www.bangaloremirror.com/bangalore/others/Every-morning-he-put-on-a-face-pack-and-sat-at-make-up-table/articleshow/44964159.cms?,
 "Every morning, he would get up, use a face pack, and have a long shower. He 
would then go straight into his parents' room and sit down at his mother's 
make-up table. After applying a liberal coat of foundation and some other 
cosmetics, he would finish off with a touch of pink lip-gloss and only then 
leave the room."  The wife also insists her husband loved the colour pink a tad 
too much and even exchanged a blue colour vase that she once bought for a pink 
one.
 

 Dr Lisa also told the Mirror, that her neighbours told her that,"John was 
constantly bringing male friends home."   She adds, "He told me he had brought 
a friend over to discuss business. When I asked him who the friend was, and why 
I hadn't heard of him before, he admitted he had met the man at a bus stop near 
our house."
 It was the presence of strange men in her home that led to her decision to 
installing "hidden cameras inside their hall, bedrooms, and kitchen," notes the 
report She then left for her maternal home for 10 days. It was when she came 
back that she saw the footage of "her husband's homosexual encounters with 
another man," points the report, after which she filed the complaint.
 Naturally the arrest has sparked online criticism. On the Bangalore Mirror's 
https://www.facebook.com/TheBangaloreMirror Facebook page users pointed out how 
such an arrest was wrong. One person wrote, "Arrested for being gay? That's 
crazy and not humane. The wife should have just divorced him, not pressed 
charges. What a waste of police work!"
 Another user wrote, "Bravo Bravo! Arresting an innocent man when we have 
rapists tormenting the city." Some pointed out that the law was wrong to book a 
man for being gay and at the most he should be arrested for cheating and 
infidelity and not his sexuality.
 The dubious nature of using Section 377 to arrest anyone, apart, the way the 
Bangalore Mirror report has been framed and worded is also cause for serious 
concern. While it is true that the wife has reasons to be devastated, the 
report heavily relies on her version of the story, without giving voice to the 
other party. No quote has been taken from either the husband or his family to 
give the readers their version of the story. In fact the tone of the story is 
deeply sympathetic to the wife to the point of villainisng the husba

g_b Tim Cook’s memo is not what will play on the minds of gay Indians this week

[gay_bombay moderator modera...@gaybombay.in [gay_bombay]]

Tim Cook’s memo is not what will play on the minds of gay Indians this week


SHARE






Written by


Vikram Johri


2 hours ago






It’s a tale of two companies and of two worlds disjointed in their
treatment of sexual minorities. This week, Tim Cook of Apple finally
confirmed what had long been known in technology circles. In a signed piece
in Businessweek, Cook came out as gay, as he lent his support for marriage
equality in the US. As that battle moves languidly from one state to the
next, Cook’s support will add much weight to the fight for gay equality.






Back home too there was much action. As reported in Bangalore Mirror on
October 29, a finance executive at Infosys was arrested by the Bangalore
police after his wife furnished evidence of the man’s homosexuality. The
Mirror story begins thus: “Lip gloss, foundation, innerwear in ‘girlie’
patterns and colours, and a passion for all things pink—these are just some
of the traits that set off alarm bells in a dentist’s head, almost a year
after marriage, that her husband could be gay.”






Leave aside the inappropriateness of this blatant prurience, for that is
just how the media, most of it anyway, works in this country. Look instead
at the details of the case. For any woman to realise that her husband is
gay is no less than shocking, but when the society that she belongs to is
as patriarchal as ours, the risk of who the blame is pinned on for the
dissolution of the marriage is a threatening prospect. The woman in
question tried remedying matters by seeking the services of a marital
counsellor, but neither the husband nor his parents showed any interest.
What was she to do?






She went away to her parents’ house for a week and installed a hidden
camera in her husband’s room. When she returned, she discovered that her
husband had had sex with another man in her absence. She went to the police
with the tapes and the man was promptly arrested under Section 377.






The whole business leaves one depressed. First, the man who, like so many
others, goes ahead and marries a woman. It’s all very well to raise the
banner of revolt against his cowardice but we live in a country where
everything from the law onwards looks askance at homosexuality. Where young
boys and girls, men and women are thrown out of their home, village,
community for being true to themselves. Why would anyone in their right
mind be out, live out?






Two, the woman, who learns a few days/weeks/months into the marriage that
her husband is gay. Perhaps he likes to dress up. Perhaps he trawls gay
websites. Perhaps he has a collection of gay erotica on his smartphone.
Each of these discoveries takes her deeper into the abyss that is her
flailing marriage. She faces a post-marital family that refuses to
acknowledge her concerns. She faces a society that looks down upon divorced
women. What is she to do?






Three, the law. In a supreme irony, the same law that goads men to stay in
the closet, is foisted upon them when their truth is out in the open. It
makes for a messy affair.






One hopes that the woman can outlive the trauma. One hopes better sense
prevails among the man’s parents. One hopes the man himself will find the
space to pick up his life and start again. There are no happy outcomes here
and try as one might, nobody on his side comes out looking good. But it
would be a greater tragedy if we blamed the whole sordid affair on some
individuals’ malice when all of us—our society, our media and our
laws—contrive to produce this dastardly cocktail.






For the out Indian man, it is impossible not to feel slightly bipolar about
the events of the week. One moment, he is high in the clouds celebrating
the rapid advancement of gay rights, albeit in another part of the world;
and the next, he is brought crashing to the ground by the reality around
him.






Picture this man. He, who perhaps belongs to a tolerant, even welcoming
family, has, in his mind, crossed the distance between his coming out and
the post-facto banality of his situation. He is like everybody else, and
this realisation that hit him like a ton of bricks when he came out, has
now nestled inside him as a benign presence. He does not even care all that
much for his homosexuality, truth be told. It is there, simply.






But the world at large will not let him be. The world will conspire, daily,
to marinate him in the sadness and shame of those like him, still at the
fringes, still battling for acceptance. The world will force him to face
every day, not the random joys of his state, but the vicarious suffering of
it.


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 Public archives a

g_b Striking the wrong note...

[gay_bombay moderator modera...@gaybombay.in [gay_bombay]]

 Striking the wrong note...
* Salacious, prurient, insensitive - that is the yellow journalism
practiced by much of the media when it reports on gays. * The latest case
is a good illustration, says VIKRAM JOHRI
Posted/Updated Saturday, Nov 01 12:53:29, 2014
  In June, a lesbian committed suicide in Chhattisgarh. The act received
only cursory coverage, perhaps because the story was from a state that does
not normally hit the radar of gay rights. When I searched Google News for
"lesbian suicide India", links from 2011 and earlier showed up. (Rest
assured, if it is a dastardly event, the chances it happened earlier in
India are high.)


 There was only one link to the story, in the June 16 Raipur edition
of the *Times
of India*. A 22-year-old woman from Pakhanjur tehsil in Kanker district,
who was in a relationship with an allegedly minor girl, had committed
suicide. Following the news of her death, her partner also tried to kill
herself by consuming poison, the report added. Apart from this news report,
the only other mention of the Chhattisgarh story was in a review in *Mint *of
a film about lesbians.


 Perhaps it is no bad thing that the woman’s suicide or the many other
permutations of violence that visit gay people in India do not receive much
media coverage. For, when the media does deign to report on gay issues, it
is marked by a regrettable lack of sensitivity, making one wonder if
homosexuality, that famed “last prejudice”, is organically such a different
beast that it is impossible to report or write or speak truly about it
unless one is born to it.


This week brought a fresh example of this malaise. The headline of the top
story of the *Bangalore Mirror *dated Oct 29, 2014, said: "Section  377
slapped on Infosys techie after wife catches his gay acts on spycam." The
first paragraph read: "Lip gloss, foundation, innerwear in 'girlie'
patterns and colours, and a passion for all things pink - these are just
some of the traits that set off alarm bells in a dentist's head, almost a
year after marriage, that her husband could be gay."


 Examine the language. This is the same paper whose sister publication in
Mumbai peeped into Deepika Padukone's cleavage and found newsworthy
material. From the first sentence, there is a desire to turn the story into
a narrative - the gay man with a fetish for pink - as the writer watches
over the reader's shoulder to induce the appropriate gasp here, the
disgusted look there.


 The words, so carefully chosen to fashion the image of a man thoroughly
compromised, tell us what to think before we have had the chance to learn

the first detail of the case.


 To be sure, there are no easy answers in these cases but we rarely see
even the relevant questions being raised in the media. There is, for
example, no discussion on the irony of applying a law to those who have
been forced to stay in the closet because of the law itself.


All the media does is report with an eye for prurience. Details of how the
marriage broke, the lack of sexual compatibility, the "queer" habits of the
man, are all regurgitated in an effort not to capture a personal tragedy
but to arouse the reader's base instincts.


Consider another case. The death of Chetan Bharadwaj, an advertising
executive in Mumbai, last year was strikingly similar to that of Pushkin
Chandra in Delhi in 2004. Both Pushkin and Chetan were affluent, upper
middle class men living in metros.


They were also gay. The dead bodies of both were discovered naked. Reports
indicated they were under the influence of alcohol at the time of death.
They had also had sex moments before their deaths which, in both cases,
were violent and brutal.


 There were other similarities. The murderers in both cases were slum
dwellers, or labourers. In Pushkin’s case, they were men he had come across
on the street. In Chetan’s case, the murderer was a glass worker whom
Chetan had met when he came to work in his housing society.


 Contrast these murders with the lesbian’s suicide in Chhattisgarh. The
same media which failed to report the latter went to town with Chetan’s
death. (Pushkin’s occurred in a strikingly different media environment ten
years ago, and so its coverage does not really count.)


 The gory details of how he was killed, what his daily itinerary was, etc.,
were discussed threadbare by nearly all the Mumbai English dailies. There
was a tendency, as has been the case with the reportage on the Infosys
employee’s arrest, to rob the story of context.


 The supposed liberality that the intellectual crowd reserves for
alternative sexualities is exposed for its hollowness when the debate
shifts to something as final and conclusive as murder.


Where are we to go from here? One place is social media, where gay men have
erupted in a storm of protest about the language and style adopted in the
Bangalore Mirror story. Such spaces also allow debate and discussions,
whose outcomes are important to those fighting the battle against Section
377.

g_b Delhi Queer Pride parade takes to the streets despite gay sex ban

[gay_bombay moderator modera...@gaybombay.in [gay_bombay]]

 [image: Indians turned out in numbers for New Delhi's leading gay pride
parade despite the country's ban on gay sex.]


Indians turned out in numbers for New Delhi's leading gay pride parade
despite the country's ban on gay sex. * Photo: Tsering Topgyal*


*New Delhi: *Hundreds of people danced, sang and cheered in a gay pride
parade in India's capital on Sunday, the first since the country's top
court reinstated a ban on gay sex in the world's largest democracy.


Multi-coloured balloons, masquerade masks and wigs, a huge rainbow flag and
a St Bernard dog ushered in the seventh Delhi Queer Pride parade, with many
shaking their hips to drum beats.


Participants chanting "Azaadi" (freedom) and shouting slogans such as "I'm
gay, that's OK" carried banners and placards demanding their right to love.
[image: Delhi's Queer Pride Parade called for equal rights for India's gay,
lesbian, bisexual and transgender citizens.]


Delhi's Queer Pride Parade called for equal rights for India's gay,
lesbian, bisexual and transgender citizens.* Photo: Adnan Abidi *


"We are making a statement that we exist. We are not a minuscule minority.
Deal with it," said Mohnish Kabir Malhotra, 27, a publicist and one of the
organisers of this year's event.
Advertisement


In December, India's Supreme Court threw out a 2009 ruling by a lower court
that had decriminalised gay sex, saying only parliament could repeal
Section 377 of India's penal code which bans sex against the order of
nature.


The British colonial-era law is widely interpreted to mean homosexual sex,
and can be punished with up to 10 years in jail. Many choose to hide their
sexuality for fear of discrimination.
[image: Members and supporters of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender
(LGBT) community take part in a gay pride parade in New Delhi on Sunday.]


Members and supporters of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender (LGBT)
community take part in a gay pride parade in New Delhi on Sunday. * Photo:
Sajjad Hussain*


Some participants said they had little faith that Prime Minister Narendra
Modi's government would revoke Section 377, despite having a majority in
the lower house of parliament.


*More conservative *


Mr Modi's ruling Bharatiya Janata Party is a right-wing nationalist outfit
perceived to be more conservative than the previous Congress-led government.


Modi has not publicly commented on the issue of homosexuality, although his
colleague Rajnath Singh had called gay sex "unnatural" in the wake of the
December court ruling. Some BJP politicians such as Arun Jaitley have said
that gay sex should be decriminalised.


A poster at the parade depicted Mr Modi's face filled in with the colours
of the rainbow, the symbol of the gay rights movement, and the caption "I
love Amit Shah", referring to the president of Modi's political party.


Some participants said the prime minister did not mean the gay community
any harm.


"Modi is a very wise person. I don't know whether he'll support or not
support, but he's not going to do anything which is going to harm any
Indian citizen's right," said Rudrani Chettri, 36, a social worker and LGBT
activist.


Some of the biggest cheers at the parade were reserved for Dora, a St
Bernard dressed in a T-shirt promoting LGBT rights, brought by her owner,
who works at the US embassy.


The parade brought traffic to a halt in central New Delhi, with bemused
drivers watching the proceedings from the sidelines.


"As long as it's consensual, it should not matter to anyone. They shouldn't
force themselves on anyone," said Kapil Yadav, an auto-rickshaw driver who
was among passers-by and commuters who stopped to watch the procession.




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