Re: [Goanet] Should we take care of our parents, should we care about our children at all?
I am sure that Selma Edward do not mean to say that Charity does not begin at home, nor do they mean that families ought not to band together to help each other in times of need. The original story was that a mother was abandoned by her two sons when they left for another country, in search of work. They found it and basically forgot all about mother, even when they came back to Goa on a visit, they stayed only a very short while, leaving her alone, as a widow to cope on her own. Broken hearted poor in spirit as well as ready cash, she passed away eventually, but it was found that she saved some of the money, for her funeral. This was found in her hand when a neighbour came by saw her door ajar, went indoors found the body. The majority of us can do better with our lives, but the older one gets, the less of a memory we have. But we dont forget our children, in turn the children ought not to forget their parents. Ok so the boys thought, the old woman has a piece of land a field, a house to live in what more does she want? Maybe its true, she had all this but did she know how to convert this into real money, cash she could have used? But is this really about money? Or is it a wake up call to all of us to be a little kinder to our relatives, friends and neighbours? We can all provide ourselves with pensions, start saving in your 20's and you will be laughing all the way to the supermarket checkout, you can buy anything you want. But when you become a parent, of two or more children, try to work out how much each child costs in terms of cash, over a year, not including their private education if this is the way it goes and you will find the money you ought to have for yourself and partner has actually deteriorated by over 70%. Have your children and give them to the state to look after, save yourself all the worry of caring and nurturing your children, the sleepless nights, the worry when they develop asthma the trips to the hospital, thinking this is it, we will be coming back on our own this time. All the fuss and worry about looking clean and smart when going to school, providing lunch money, they are with you 24/7 and rely on you. Why bother? Let someone else take care of them. Welcome to the 21st century. Oh of course this is not the way forward for some people, but a good way out if you want to provide for your own old age, after all children that we create and the mother carries about with her for 9 agonising months (thanks to the changes in hormones over this period, its not as bad for her, but if dad had to do it, there would only be one-child families, believe me!). Good luck to all who care look after their children, perhaps we ought to take more time to teach them a bit more about caring for the less fortunate a bit more, and less about career chasing and putting off parenthood until their mid-30's and in their 40's. Charity begins and ought to grow, in the home, for parents, for children, for neighbours and friends.There are several hundred ashrams in India where enough children can be found abandoned due to parents dying of HIV / Aids, starvation or just not enough room for them anymore, we need a safety net for these people, not for the rest of the nation to consider dumping more onto the ashrams. Perhaps even take a child from these ashrams if you have the room, the money and the compassion to do this. selma wrote This is life in the urban, 21st century. Please don'tlook to God or the Church to sort out these verytangible problems. We as a society have to addressthem head-on. -- Parents should not look forward to be looked after by their children, that is the core issue. As Khalil Gibran (a philosopher once said): Children are NOT your children. ED. -
[Goanet] Should we take care of our parents
Selma wrote: What we havenow are more like mental asylums and I wouldn't put myworst enemy there much less my parents. This is life in the urban, 21st century. Please don'tlook to God or the Church to sort out these verytangible problems. We as a society have to addressthem head-on. Parents should not look forward to be looked after by their children, that is the core issue. As Khalil Gibran (a philosopher once said): Children are NOT your children. They come through you but not FROM you. Therefore they have their own life to live, if you had died young would your children be dead as well? ED. - For ideas on reducing your carbon footprint visit Yahoo! For Good this month.
Re: [Goanet] Should we take care of our parents?
--- http://www.GOANET.org --- Support growing the reading habit among Goa's next generation of achievers Bookworm Library and Magazine Bluebelle, Tamba Colony, St Inez, Goa Contacts: Tel: +91 9823222665 Email: [EMAIL PROTECTED] --- Gilbert Lawrence [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote: The man's 'problem' was the shares were now priced at 70 dollars a share. If he sold his stock, he would pay the Capital Gains tax on the amount. So he did not sell the stock. So here is a retired / senior citizen living poor AND wanting the government to provide more. Yet his preferred to forgo 80% of his stock value because he did not want to pay the 20% tax to the government, from whom he expected financial help. Ah! Gilbert, You bring up one of my favourite subjects. My first land lady in Canada came to me with this problem. Her late husband made her promise that she would never sell her IBM or Bell Canada shares. Her late husband had worked for IBM. In the year 1999 or thereabouts, Bell Canada spun off Nortel. Nortel was trading at $110 dollars and my land lady wanted to know what to do. My advice to her was to sell her Nortel shares and use the proceeds to buy more Bell Canada shares. Her son came to me and said, NO. Since it was a spin-off, her Nortel shares costed her $0. If she sold it for $110.00, she would have to pay taxes of 30% on the profits and be left with $77. Well, Nortel shares trade at $1.60 today. Both Revenue Canada and my ex-land lady are much the poorer. Strangely enough, the taxes we pay are for the services we use. In the case on my ex- land lady, she used to get a pension of $1,000 per month from the Canadian Govt. This pension is just for being over the age of 65 and living in Canada. Such are the policies of a socialist country. When you become a senior citizen, all your medical bills are paid for by the state AND you receive a state pension. My ex-land lady could not see this. Mervyn3.0 PS. I know a lot of people who choose to migrate to Canada because of the pensions. Just imagine, you have both your parents at home, they each get a thousand dollars a month pension even if they have never worked in Canada. In addition, the Canadian Govt pays for ALL their medical expenses. If there is no paradise in the next world, there surely is one here. Yahoo! Canada Toolbar: Search from anywhere on the web, and bookmark your favourite sites. Download it now at http://ca.toolbar.yahoo.com.
Re: [Goanet] Should we take care of our parents?
--- http://www.GOANET.org --- Support growing the reading habit among Goa's next generation of achievers Bookworm Library and Magazine Bluebelle, Tamba Colony, St Inez, Goa Contacts: Tel: +91 9823222665 Email: [EMAIL PROTECTED] --- As with most things, Albert's heart is in the right place but his solutions are as fuzzy as coconuts. Yes, there is a problem with care for elderly in Goa, but this is not a moral issue, nor does it need the moral chest thumping Albert suggests. The old concept of living your entire life within a 25 mile radius is redundant. People today have to constantly move to earn a living. As a result of which, offspring may not be in available when elderly parents need help. Even if they are available, busy office lives make it very difficult to look after the elderly full-time. The solution to this has to be two-tiered. At a personal level, every individual will have to make arrangements for their own care. This may mean setting up pension-funds, etc, that will mature at 65plus. Parents have to take care of themselves before they take care of their children's every need. At the macro-level, the state will have to become more involved in setting up the necessary hospitals, hospices and assisted living facilities. What we have now are more like mental asylums and I wouldn't put my worst enemy there much less my parents. The private sector should also look into this lucrative industry and set up part-time nursing facilities, housekeeping, home-meal deliveries, part-time attendants for hire etc. This is life in the urban, 21st century. Please don't look to God or the Church to sort out these very tangible problems. We as a society have to address them head-on. selma - Albert Desouza Now the mother grew old in age and found life to be a burden. She could not work any more nor work in her own field. Life without any money was really a burden to her. The sons when they came to Goa would not stay with the mother as the house was old and partly fallen down. The window panes broken and in some rooms props were erected. The sons would just visit the mother alone and be with her for few minutes during that time she would beg for money. They would part with one or two thousand which she would keep somewhere in a box without using it as she needed that money for her funeral. The two sons felt that they could have a big building constructed in the place where an old mud house stood. They got a nice fantastic price for it. The builder gave the sons a good price. albert Need a vacation? Get great deals to amazing places on Yahoo! Travel. http://travel.yahoo.com/
Re: [Goanet] Should we take care of our parents?
--- http://www.GOANET.org --- Support growing the reading habit among Goa's next generation of achievers Bookworm Library and Magazine Bluebelle, Tamba Colony, St Inez, Goa Contacts: Tel: +91 9823222665 Email: [EMAIL PROTECTED] --- Thank you Albert for giving us the story of your acquaintance. She is a classic example of LIVING POOR AND DYING RICH Let me give you a true account - the American version. A few years ago, I was invited by a local radio station to do a live talk-program on cancer to educate their listeners about cancer - prevention, screening, early detection and treatment. I made it to the radio station about 15 minutes before I went On Air to coordinate the program. While there, I was listening to the radio program by an retired person. He was telling his listeners how life is difficult for seniors, with the rising cost of living. He exhorted his listeners to write to the government and demand more retirement payments and services for senior citizens. I was impressed by the speaker's zeal. After his program he came out of the speaker's room. There was about 10 minutes for the change of speakers, interviewers and for the radio station to run its commercials. As the man came out, I recognized him. He was my patient. He told me in five minutes about his 'plight' as I complimented him about his program. The 70-year old man started working at age 20 at the local Westinghouse plant. He made about 10 dollars a week. As part of his employment package, the company took a dollar of his week's pay and gave him 1 share of company stock. Over a year he had 52 shares and over 40 years of service he had about 2000 shares. The man's 'problem' was the shares were now priced at 70 dollars a share. If he sold his stock, he would pay the Capital Gains tax on the amount. So he did not sell the stock. So here is a retired / senior citizen living poor AND wanting the government to provide more. Yet his preferred to forgo 80% of his stock value because he did not want to pay the 20% tax to the government, from whom he expected financial help. Many elect others to give them financial help while they refuse to utilize their own resources. Albert's acquaintance had her own field which she could not cultivate. And my patient had his Westinghouse stock. Yet their children will have no difficulty to sell their assets for a nice fantastic price. Kind Regards, GL --- Albert Desouza Now the mother grew old in age and found life to be a burden. She could not work any more nor work in her own field. Life without any money was really a burden to her. The sons when they came to Goa would not stay with the mother as the house was old and partly fallen down. The window panes broken and in some rooms props were erected. The sons would just visit the mother alone and be with her for few minutes during that time she would beg for money. They would part with one or two thousand which she would keep somewhere in a box without using it as she needed that money for her funeral. The two sons felt that they could have a big building constructed in the place where an old mud house stood. They got a nice fantastic price for it. The builder gave the sons a good price. albert
Re: [Goanet] Should we take care of our parents............. ? Yes indeed we should........!!
--- http://www.GOANET.org --- Support growing the reading habit among Goa's next generation of achievers Bookworm Library and Magazine Bluebelle, Tamba Colony, St Inez, Goa Contacts: Tel: +91 9823222665 Email: [EMAIL PROTECTED] --- My goodness Albert, this is a sad story, unfortunately so very common-place all over the world. The younger generation, if not taught properly about their responsibilities towards their elders they will just drift away from family commitments, after all its easier to move away start a new life then to continue the tradition of looking after each other, especially in times of need. I was almost brought to tears regarding this story you put here, its is REALLY sad, for her for all the lonely elderly people who have been abandoned by their grown up children. If you have touched the heart of JUST ONE person reading this, you will have possibly succeeded in stirring other consciences about their responsiblities. Good wishes to you. John Monteiro Berkshire, England --- One day the good old neighbour found the front door closed and no sign of the old lady. They opened the door and went inside andfound her dead .She was holding a bundle of notes in . The neighbours tried to contact her two sons and when contacted they flatly told them that they cannot come to Goa . Years went by. The two sons felt that they could have a big building constructed in the place where an old mud house stood. They got a nice fantastic price for it .The builder gave the sons a good price. albert _
[Goanet] Should we take care of our parents ?
--- http://www.GOANET.org --- Support growing the reading habit among Goa's next generation of achievers Bookworm Library and Magazine Bluebelle, Tamba Colony, St Inez, Goa Contacts: Tel: +91 9823222665 Email: [EMAIL PROTECTED] --- When people get married they are looking for the birth of a child. May be the birth may be postponed for sometime as both husband and wife needs time to settle down. But as years go by and if a child is not born the couple lose all happiness. That shows how much they care for a child. Once the child is born the parents forget themselves. Sometimes the child keeps them awake whole night by wanting to play or may be the child is sick. I have seen many times parents forget their sleep, food when their child is sick specially when the child is in hospital. During the time period as the children grow up the parents have one interest and that is to give the children their best. Philomena lost her husband when her two sons were very small the elder was five and younger was three.She did not marry again only because her second marriage may come in the way of the children. She worked very hard to give her two sons the best. She did not study much and so working in the office was out of question. After their twelveth both sons got jobs in the gulf and they both got married. They gradually concentrated on their own families and forgot their mother. Now the mother grew old in age and found life to be a burden. She could not work any more nor work in her own field. Life without any money was really a burden to her.The sons when they came to Goa would not stay with the mother as the house was old and partly fallen down. The window panes broken and in some rooms props were erected. The sons would just visit the mother alone and be with her for few minutes during that time she would beg for money. They would part with one or two thousand which she would keep somewhere in a box without using it as she needed that money for her funeral. She did not get any dole from the church as she was termed as gulfkar's mom.A good neighbour looked after her field andsometimes gave her food. One day the good old neighbour found the front door closed and no sign of the old lady. They opened the door and went inside andfound her dead .She was holding a bundle of notes in her right hand .When counted it was three thousand .There was a neatly tied bundle and when opened they found a nice white sari .Philomen knew her end was near and had kept the front door half closed so that people could enter. She kept the money meant for her funeral and so also her sari.The neighbours tried to contact her two sons and when contacted they flatly told them that they cannot come to Goa as they will not get leave. Years went by. The two sons felt that they could have a big building constructed in the place where an old mud house stood. They got a nice fantastic price for it .The builder gave the sons a good price. albert _ Search from any Web page with powerful protection. Get the FREE Windows Live Toolbar Today! http://toolbar.live.com/?mkt=en-in
