WASHINGTON, D.C.-The Institute for the Investigation
of irregular Internet Phenomena announced today that
many Internet users are becoming infected by a new
virus that causes them to believe without question
every groundless story, legend, and dire warning
that shows up in their Inbox or on their browser.
The Gullibility Virus, as it is called, apparently
makes people believe and forward copies of silly
hoaxes relating to E-Mail viruses, get-rich-quick
schemes, and conspiracy theories. "These are not
just readers of tabloids or people who buy lottery
tickets based on fortune cookie numbers," a
spokesman said. "Most are otherwise normal people,
who would laugh at the same stories if told to them
by a stranger on a street corner." However, once
these same people become infected with the
Gullibility Virus, they believe anything they read on
the Internet. "My immunity to tall tales and bizarre
claims is all gone," reported one weeping victim. "I
believe every warning message and sick child story
my friends forward to me, even though most of the
messages are anonymous." Internet users are
urged to examine themselves for symptoms of the
virus, which include the following * the
willingness to believe improbable stories without
thinking * the urge to forward multiple copies of
such stories to others *
a lack of desire to take three minutes to check to see
if a story is true
T. C. is an example of someone recently infected. He
told one reporter, "I read on the Net that the major
ingredient in almost all shampoos makes your hair
fall out, so I've stopped using shampoo." When told
about the Gullibility Virus, T . C. said he would
stop reading e-mail, so that he would not become
infected. President Clinton has been advised by the
National Health Council. He has had an emergency
session with former presidents Bush, Reagan, Carter,
Ford, and Lincoln. All agreed he should not
quarantine the country. This is not being reported in
the major news media to avoid panic. Anyone with
symptoms is urged to seek help immediately. Experts
recommend that at the first feelings of gullibility,
Internet users rush to their favorite search engine
and look up the item tempting them to thoughtless
credence. Most hoaxes, legends, and tall tales have
been widely discussed and exposed by the Internet
community. Many companies have internal support
groups to help employees minimize the impact of this
terrible virus.
