[JOKES] FYI: Za nejelaeshtite da praznuvat dnes maje

[Angel Kirilov]

Петльов ден

Появява се в обичаите на населението по повод истинска случка,
разказвана от легендите. В периода на Османското робство се е събирал т.
н. " кръвен данък" - еничари са ходили по къщите и насилствено са
отделяли мъжките рожби от родителите им. За да спаси рожбата си, една
майка проявява остроумие, като коли петел и с кръвта му напръсква
пруста, портичката и оградата пред дома си. Пристигналите еничари, които
обикалят района, виждат кървавите следи и се убеждават, че преди тях
вече е минала еничарска потеря. Така майката успява да спаси мъжката си
рожба. По - късно датата 2 февруари става ден на мъжката рожба. На този
ден майките, които имат момченца, гостуват на своята баба- акушерка в
селото. Носят се погача, заклан петел и дарове.

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[JOKES] New device

[Angel Kirilov]

WinXP Rulez

http://www.bgit.net/?id=63298

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[JOKES] Kak se praviat versii...

[Angel Kirilov]

(1.13) Можно ли из W2kPro сделать W2kServer, и зачем это надо? Можно.
Хотя и нельзя :-) Для этого служит программка под названием NTSwitch.
Всё что она делает, это сохраняет копию вашего реестра, редактирует его,
и восстанавливает его обратно. Благодаря тому, что различные версии
микрософтовских ОС не имеют принципиальных отличий (кроме набора
программного обеспечения, идущего с системой), этого достаточно для того
что бы ╚обмануть╩ систему. В результате мы избавляемся от ограничений по
железу, получаем возможность устанавливать серверный софт на W2kPro, и
убираем ограничение на 10 одновременных сетевых подключений. Минусом
этого решения является то, что никто не сможет вам гарантировать что
переделанная таким образом система будет нормально работать. С другой
стороны, эта же программка позволяет вернуть всё обратно, с Server на
Professional (если вы не удалили бакап старого реестра). Взять эту
программку можно здесь:
. Она работает под NT,
W2k. Сработает она и под XP, превратив её в что то непонятное, вроде
CodenameWhistler Server но работа XP (или уже не ХР) после такой
╚трансформации╩ оставляет желать много лучшего.

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[JOKES] FW: a new job?

[Angel Kirilov]

A jobless man applied for the position of 'office boy'
at Microsoft. The HR manager interviewed him, then
gave him a test, which was to clean the floor. After
that the HR manager said "You are engaged, give me
your e-mail address, and I'll send you the application
to fill, as well as when you will start". The man
replied, "I don't have a computer, neither an email".
"I'm sorry", said the HR manager, "if you don't have
an email, that means you do not exist. And he who
doesn't exist, cannot have the job".
The man left with no hope at all. He didn't know what
to do, with only US$10 in his pocket. The man then
decided to go to the supermarket and buy a 10Kg tomato
crate. He sold the tomatoes in a door-to-door round.
In less than two hours, he succeeded to double his
capital. He repeated the operation three times, and
returned home with 60 US$. The man realized that he
could survive this way, and started to go everyday
earlier, and return late. Thus, his money doubled and
tripled day by day. Shortly later,he bought a cart,
then a truck, then he had his own fleet of delivery
vehicles. 5 years later, the man became one of the
biggest food retailers in the U. S. He started to plan
his family's future, and decided to get life
insurance. He called an insurance broker, and choose a
protection plan. When the conversation was concluded,
the broker asked him for his email. The man replied:
"I don't have an email". The broker replied curiosly,
"you don't have an email, and yet have succeeded to
build an empire. Do you imagine what you could have
been if you had an email?"!! The man thought for a
while, and replied: "an office boy at Microsoft!" The
moral of this story:

1- Internet is not the solution to your life
2- if you don't have Internet, and work hard, you can
be a millionaire
3- if you received this message by email, you are
closer to be an officeboy, rather than a millionaire
4- don't think High Tech Job cab earn money

P.S.: Do not reply to this email, I am going to sell
tomatoes.

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[JOKES] Novo vaorajenie na policiata

[Angel Kirilov]

http://www.cnsys.bg/files.html?prj=39122

Na men mi se vijda komichna chasta:

"Патрулните ченгета ще носят на
униформите си миниатюрен обектив и
микрофон и ще снимат всеки, който се
опита да им предложи рушвет."


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[JOKES] Gledaite vnimatelno

[Angel Kirilov]

http://www.ritsumei.ac.jp/~akitaoka/saishin-e.html

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[JOKES] Dzverici

[Angel Kirilov]

http://www.standartnews.com/stnews/style/index.htm

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[JOKES] Profesii...

[Angel Kirilov]

Добре му е на моряка - връща се от далечно плаване, а девойката го чака
на брега.
Добре му е на летеца - връща се от полет, а девойката го чака на
летището.
Добре му е на машиниста - връща се от пътуване, а девойката го чака на
гарата.
Само на девойката не й е добре - тичай на пристанището, тичай на
летището, а от летището - на гарата...



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[JOKES] Obiava

[Angel Kirilov]

Обява:
"Млад, здрав и снажен, притежавам две офшорки, яхта, вила на Хаваите,
порше и частен самолет! Не купувам и не продавам нищо - просто искам да
се похваля!"

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[JOKES] Kursova rabota

[Angel Kirilov]

http://zhivko.netbg.com/hmr/com/informatika.html

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[JOKES] Kak se gledat deca po studentski

[Angel Kirilov]

http://www.bukvite.com/poem.php?nick=Zzloba&docid=749

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[JOKES] Erotik kalender

[Angel Kirilov]

http://www.contnet.de/customers/rtl/erotikkalender/

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[JOKES] ICQ forever

[Angel Kirilov]

http://www.capital.bg/article.php?broi=2002-35&page=n1-35-7&rubr=net

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[JOKES] No comment

[Angel Kirilov]

http://welin.etaligent.net/zakuska.jpg

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[JOKES] Pak M$ i BG ministar

[Angel Kirilov]

"÷ âßÌÇÁÒÉÑ ÎÁÄ 50% ÏÔ ÐÏÌÚ×ÁÔÅÌÉÔÅ ÒÁÂÏÔÑÔ Ó ÐÒÏÄÕËÔÉ ÎÁ "íÁÊËÒÏÓÏÆÔ",
Á Ó "ìÉÎÏËÓ" ÎÅ ÐÏ×ÅÞÅ
   ÏÔ 5%. ïÔÇÏ×ÏÒßÔ ÚÁÝÏ ÓÍÅ ÓÅ ÏÒÉÅÎÔÉÒÁÌÉ ËßÍ "íÁÊËÒÏÓÏÆÔ" Å ÑÓÅÎ."

Ot interview s ministar Kalchev.
http://www.cnsys.bg/files.html?prj=22778

Spored nego na kakva OS rabotiat ostanalite 45%?!? I ot kade e izsmukal
takiva danni.
Negramotni hora dal gospod, ama zashto tolkova paradirat s tova.

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Re: [JOKES] FW: Dogovorut na pravitelstvoto s Microsoft

[Angel Kirilov]

Ami to tuk choveka v prav tekst si pishe, che cialata rabota s tozi dogovor
e nezakonna, poneje niama nachin zakonno darjavata da zakupuva licenzi.
Ama ako niakoi "proektira" edna Linux instalacia sas StarOffice i ia
"vnedri" shte moje po zakonen nachin da specheli targ.
Pone taka az vijdam neshtata. Ama nali ne sam iurist.
Angel
Slavi Andreev wrote:


Mai
ne e mnogo za tuk, ama …. 

http://ludost.net/msmail/

[JOKES] Work day

[Angel Kirilov]

http://www.bgit.net/?id=27358&ref=1&action=view

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[JOKES] [Fwd: FW: :):)]

[Angel Kirilov]

 Original Message 
Subject: FW: :):)
Date: Thu, 18 Apr 2002 13:05:15 +0100
From: "Cristi URSU" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>



> Women at Different Ages.
> 
> What's the difference between women at the age of 8,
> 18, 28, 38, 48 and 58?
> 
> 08 - You take her to bed and tell her a story.
> 18 - You tell her a story and take her to bed.
> 28 - You don't need to tell her any story to take her
> to bed.
> 38 - She tells you a story and takes you to bed.
> 48 - You tell her a story to avoid going to bed.
> 58 - You stay in bed all day to avoid hearing her story.
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[JOKES] company policy :))

[Angel Kirilov]

Experiment:

"Start with a cage containing five monkeys. Inside the cage, hang a
banana on a string and place a set of stairs under it. Before long, a
monkey will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana. As
soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the other monkeys with cold
water. After a while, another monkey makes an attempt with the same
result - all the other monkeys are sprayed with cold water. Pretty soon,

when another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will
try to prevent it.
Now, put away the cold water. Remove one monkey from the cage and
replace it with a new one. The new monkey sees the banana and wants to
climb the stairs. To his surprise and horror, all of the other monkeys
attack him. After another attempt and attack, he knows that if he tries
to climb the stairs, he will be assaulted.
Next, remove another of the original five monkeys and replace it with a
new one. The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked. The previous
newcomer takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm! Likewise, replace

a third original monkey with a new one, then a fourth, then the fifth.
Every time the newest monkey takes to the stairs, he is attacked. Most
of the monkeys that are beating him have no idea why they were not
permitted to climb the stairs or why they are participating in the
beating of the newest monkey.
After replacing all the original monkeys, none of the remaining monkeys
have ever been sprayed with cold water. Nevertheless, no monkey ever
again approaches the stairs to try for the banana.
Why not?
Because as far as they know that's the way it's always been done around
here.
And that, my friends, is how company policy begins."


begin:vcard 
n:Kirilov;Angel
x-mozilla-html:FALSE
adr:;;
version:2.1
email;internet:[EMAIL PROTECTED]
note;quoted-printable:Sometimes it pays to stay in bed on Monday, =0D=0Arather than spending the rest of the week =0D=0Adebugging Monday's code.
fn:Angel Kirilov
end:vcard

[JOKES] Ivancho

[Angel Kirilov]

Uchitelkata v nachalnoto uchilishte uchi decata na fantazia i originalno
mislene.

Uch: Deca, pomislete kakvo moje da e tova - sivo na patia.
Deca: Betonna stena.
Uch: Pravilno. No moje da bade sashto i magarence.

Uch: A kakvo e tova - goliamo i kafiavo na poleto?
Deca: Krava.
Uch: Pravilno. No moje da bade i kupa staro seno.
Ivancho (ot zadnite chinove): Ili kupchina laina!
Uch: Ivancho, ti vse niakakva glupost shte izmislish!

Ivancho: A moje li i az da zadam vapros?
Uch. (podozritelno): Amiii, opitai...
Ivancho: A kakvo moje da e tova - kogato go pahash e tvardo, suho i
izpraveno, a kogato go izvajdash e meko, mokro i uvisnalo?
Uch. se iadosala i barzo prekasnala otgovora na uchenicite udriaiki na
Ivancho edin zdrav shamar.
Ivancho (raztrivaiki si buzata): Pravilno. No moje da bade i davka za
davchene.

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[JOKES] Kafe

[Angel Kirilov]

Edin mlatej izprashta maceto do tjah i tja mu kazva:
 - Iskash li da piinem edno kafe u doma?
A toj otgovaria:
 - Shte izticham do aptekata da vzema neshto za kafeto.

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[JOKES] Teniska

[Angel Kirilov]

http://victoriaspanties.com/Galleries/Errorwear/AUT15321.jpg

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[JOKES] Obuchenie po golf

[Angel Kirilov]

Otishla jenata na ruski novobogatash da se uchi da igrae golf. Uchila
sedmica, dve, tri, no nikakav napredak v obuchenieto ne se zabeliazval.
Togava treniora i kazal:
  - Shte vi pomolia da me izvinite, no ne moje li da hvanete stika taka,
kakto darjite majki chlen?

Bum! I topkata poletiala nadaleko, nadaleko...
  - A sega ako moje oshte vednaj, samo che izvadete stika ot ustata si.

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Re: [JOKES] Date: Fri, 25 Jan 2002 14:16:06 +0200

[Angel Kirilov]

Na maikata mejdu krakata. :-)
Ili mai po-skoro harka do neia v legloto.

Angel (Onto)

borislav popov wrote:

> Edna majka e s 21 godini po-starta ot deteto si.
>
> Sled 6 godini deteto shte byde 5 pyti po-malko ot majka si.
>
> Vypros: Kyde e
> bashtata?
> ...there is a river of birds in migration -
>a nation of women with wings...
>   --Libana--
> 

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[JOKES] Hemoroidite v ruskite Internet tarsachki

[Angel Kirilov]

http://ya.ru/yandsearch?text=%E3%E5%EC%EE%F0%F0%EE%E9

Vijte kakvo izliza s nomer 9 i nadpis za sadarjanieto na saita - Palno
saotvetstvie na temata. :-)

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[JOKES] Tejak semeen jivot

[Angel Kirilov]

A man comes home to find his wife packing her bags.
"Where are you going?" asks the surprised husband.
"To Las Vegas! I found out that there are men there who will
pay me $500 to do to them what i do for you for free".

The man thought for a second then began packing his bags.
"What do you think you are doing?" she screamed.

"I'm going to Vegas with you
I want to see how you plan to live on $1000 a year!"


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[JOKES] Pusti Wedding

[Angel Kirilov]

Mai veche nazria momenta za [EMAIL PROTECTED] :-)))
Angel Kirilov

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[JOKES] Za sviat bez nasilie. :-)

[Angel Kirilov]

"ëÏÇÁÔÏ ÎÑËÏÊ ÓÅ ÏÐÉÔ×Á ÄÁ ÇÉ ÄÒÅÓÉÒÁ, Ó×ÉÎÅÔÅ ÒÅÁÇÉÒÁÔ ËÁÔÏ
ÓßÐÒÕÚÉÔÅ - ÎÅÚÁÉÎÔÅÒÅÓÏ×ÁÎÉ, ÍßÒÚÅÌÉ×É, ÒÁÚÓÅÑÎÉ. á ËÏÇÁÔÏ ÇÉ ÎÁÓÉÌ×ÁÔ,
ÓÔÁ×ÁÔ ÍÎÏÇÏ ÎÅÒ×ÎÉ É ÉÍÁ ÏÐÁÓÎÏÓÔ ÄÁ ÐÏÌÕÞÁÔ ÑÚ×Á ÎÁ ÓÔÏÍÁÈÁ.”
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[Angel Kirilov]

Title: BOL.BG - îÏ×ÉÎÉ ÏÔ éÎÔÅÒÎÅÔ ÄÏÓÔÁ×ÞÉËßÔ ÎÁ âßÌÇÁÒÉÑ






 


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