A knockout young lady decided she wanted to get rich quick, so she
proceeded to find herself a rich 75-year-old man, planning to screw him to
death on their wedding night.
The courtship and wedding went off without any problem, in spite of the
half-century age difference. The first night of her honeymoon, she got
undressed and waited for him to come out of the bathroom to come to bed.
When he emerged, however, he had nothing on except a condom to cover a
twelve-inch erection, and was carrying a pair of earplugs and a pair of
nose plugs.
Fearing her plan had gone desperately amiss, she asked, "What are those
for?"
The elderly groom replied, "There are two things I can't stand: the sound
of a woman screaming, and the smell of burning rubber."

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