[lace-chat] :) Fwd: How Government Works:

[Tamara P Duvall]

From what I've been reading, this one "works globally", in all 
countries and continents; all one has to do is change the dollars to 
pounds, marks, yen, rand... : Not but US is leadin' in this area too, 
as usual :)


And I notice that there was no no-bid corporation created to manage the 
lot, with a CEO who earns thrice as much as the rest of them combined. 
But that's because I got the joke from a Republican friend who approves 
of such private enterprise, while disapproving of "government waste"



From: B.R.


Once upon a time the government had a scrap yard in the middle of a 
desert.  Congress said, "Someone may steal it at night."  So they 
created a night watchman position and hired a person at $18,000.00 a 
year for the job.


Then Congress said, "How does the watchman do his job without 
instruction?"  So they created a planning department and hired two 
people; one person to write the instructions for $22,000.00 and one 
person to do time studies for an additional $22,000.00 per year.


Then Congress said, "How will we know the night watchman is doing the 
tasks correctly?"  So they created a quality control department and 
hired two people; one was to do the studies for $31,000.00 and one to 
write the reports for an additional $31,000.00 per year.


Then Congress said, "How are these people going to get paid?"  So they 
created the following positions: a time keeper for a $35,000.00 annual 
salary and a payroll officer for an additional $35,000.00. Then they 
created an administrative section and hired three more people -- an  
Administrative Officer at $155,000.00 per year, an Assistant 
Administrative Officer at $125,000.00 and a Legal Secretary at 
$100,000.00 per year.


Then Congress said, "We have had this operating for one year with a 
budget cost of $574,000.00 and we are $18,000.00 over budget. We must 
cut back costs."


SO THEY LAID-OFF THE NIGHT WATCHMAN.

--
Tamara P Duvallhttp://t-n-lace.net/
Lexington, Virginia, USA (Formerly of Warsaw, Poland)

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[lace-chat] the everloving husband

[Rosemary Naish]

Also an old one, but still made me chuckle

The Everloving husband
A man and his ever-nagging wife went on vacation to Jerusalem.  While 
they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker told the husband, 
"You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here, in 
the Holy Land, for $150."  The man thought about it and told him he 
would just have her shipped home.  
The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your wife 
home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend 
only $150?"
The man replied, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three 
days later he rose from the dead.  I just can't take that chance."


Rosemary, in the home of cider- Somerset.
 

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