[LU] From the archives

[John Boocock]

I am currently working on a project about football fans in Leeds and the 
internet and stuff for a thing the Central Library is doing in Leeds. 
Looking back at the list archives from 17 years ago I came up with this 
beauty: I don't know where David Bromley is these days but I hope he has 
his coat on


Betty

*david bromley * da...@bromleyhouse.freeserve.co.uk 


/Thu, 16 Mar 2006 21:07:51 -/


 (LU) FIRST JOKE ON T'NEW LIST?

A man and his wife are awakened at 3 o'clock in the morning by a loud
pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a
drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.
"Not a chance," says the husband, "it is 3 o'clock in the morning!"

He slams the door and returns to bed. "Who was that?" asked his wife.
"Just some drunken guy asking for a push," he answers. "Did you help
him?" she asks. "No, I did not! Its 3 o'clock in the morning and it is
pouring out there!"

"Well, you have a short memory," says his wife. "Can't you remember
about three months ago when we broke down and those two guys helped us?
I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!"

The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding
rain. He calls out into the dark, "Hello, are you still there?" "Yes"
comes back the answer.

"Do you still need a push?" calls out the husband. "Yes, Please!" comes
the reply from the dark. "Where are you?" asks the husband. "Over
here... on the swing!" replies the drunk.
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Dave Dowden, a legend, a Totty Twin, a pie man! R.I.P.

[LU] latest Updates from Euronet er, 96

[John Boocock]

Leeds (Inter Lard)
Well, if the expression `No Pain-no gain!' is true, my body would 
indicate that I've just won the World Cup single-handed yesterday - I 
ache like a b***ard!!
So, to the highlights. First game and a 2-0 victory courtesy of goals 
from Sean Gaffney, a close range header from a long throw by moi, the 
second by Ade Thompson in a goalmouth scramble following a corner. Solid 
performance from the Lards - Vinny and Sean commanding in midfield and 
with Simon Hart and the immovable objects that are Jon Abbott and Mike 
Eslea in central defence, we never looked like losing! We also had an 
excellent goalie in James Tinman Lawson!
Bring on the Arse - in truth we struggled in this one. We couldn't get a 
grip of the midfield and their use of the wind to hoik it down our left 
flank caused us all sorts of problems, with only some resolute defending 
saving us. However, the tide turned some 4 minutes from the end when 
their keeper, with a peculiar red-coloured hair which had prompted `he's 
got a strawberry on his head' throughout the game, failed to hold a 
Vinny shot and Rob Gray pounced from two yards out! Worst aspect of the 
game was Simon Hart being injured and out for the rest of the tournament 
- we missed him badly!

Leeds v Man U
And then it was Scum. As Scum had scored more goals than us in winning 
their two games, we had to beat them - a draw was no good! Well on the 
whole this tournament was played in an excellent spirit, but to say 
there was an edge to this one was the understatement of the day! Some 
crunchingly effective tackling saw our Mancunian foes halted time and 
again. I got the `one more time and your off' from the ref, but pride of 
place was taken by Andy Hoskyns by an above the knee dreadfully late 
hard whack at a passing Scummer - he was dutifully booked (if I'd been 
reffing I'd have sent him off!) - the only player to be booked on the 
day, although to be fair, the standard of referring was variable! 
Anyway, supported by a vast crowd, including practically ALL the other 
clubs present, the Lards pressed on until, in another goalmouth scramble 
3 minutes from time Ade Thompson somehow got the ball in their net!
Bedlam ensued, with a full scale pitch invasion by supporters and 
players of ALL teams - Scum must have felt VERY alone! I even saw the 
Villa goalkeeper doing a huge belly-flop a la Klinnsman in the box - 
madness! The next 3 minutes seemed like half an hour! Then disaster, 
they got a free kick just outside our box with about a minute to go! 
Breath was held, as indeed were plums in our wall - the cocky git 
chipped it over us, plums were unclenched as James punched the ball over 
the bar, only for a Scummer to claim he'd been pushed! But, no dice from 
the ref! Voice's head met the corner and then it was all over. Another 
pitch invasion and off we went with `1-0, we beat the Scum 1-0' ringing 
in our ears. This was our final and we'd won!

The Voice
Sitting around for an hour or so, having been sizzled by a scorching sun 
all day, did little for us, and our game against QPR in the semi 
resulted in a 6-1 defeat. A little harsh, especially as 3 of their goals 
were top corner specials that could've gone anywhere. Boro did everyone 
a favour by beating them 1-0 in the final! And when the ref, our own Jon 
Abbot, disallowed a QPR goal for offside on the advice of the linesman, 
our own Simon Tobias, there was much satisfaction for us all!!


Finally, I'd like to thank Voice for yesterday - I certainly wouldn't 
want to do it again for a while but I think everyone enjoyed the 
occasion, the organisation was as flawless as maybe it was possible to 
be (although the medal inscriptions of Euronet Space 96 winners probably 
peeved him no end!) AND we beat the Scum in a game that really mattered. 
Nice one Dave - I hope your young 'un has recovered from the trauma of 
seeing you have your head shaved too?

The REV
knackered!

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Dave Dowden, a legend, a Totty Twin, a pie man! R.I.P.

Re: [LU] From the archives

[outlook_08f25012e96fd...@outlook.com]

   Still lurking.

   Didn’t we use to have a “Joke du jour”? Perhaps it was somewhere else.

   The coat will be going on this Sunday to trudge down Lowfields Road
   with all the other masochists


   David Bromley


   Sent from [1]Mail for Windows


   From: [2]John Boocock
   Sent: 31 July 2023 12:33
   To: [3]Leeds List
   Subject: [LU] From the archives


   I am currently working on a project about football fans in Leeds and
   the

   internet and stuff for a thing the Central Library is doing in Leeds.

   Looking back at the list archives from 17 years ago I came up with this

   beauty: I don't know where David Bromley is these days but I hope he
   has

   his coat on


   Betty


   *david bromley * da...@bromleyhouse.freeserve.co.uk

   

   /Thu, 16 Mar 2006 21:07:51 -/



 (LU) FIRST JOKE ON T'NEW LIST?


   A man and his wife are awakened at 3 o'clock in the morning by a loud

   pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a

   drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.

   "Not a chance," says the husband, "it is 3 o'clock in the morning!"


   He slams the door and returns to bed. "Who was that?" asked his wife.

   "Just some drunken guy asking for a push," he answers. "Did you help

   him?" she asks. "No, I did not! Its 3 o'clock in the morning and it is

   pouring out there!"


   "Well, you have a short memory," says his wife. "Can't you remember

   about three months ago when we broke down and those two guys helped us?

   I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!"


   The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the
   pounding

   rain. He calls out into the dark, "Hello, are you still there?" "Yes"

   comes back the answer.


   "Do you still need a push?" calls out the husband. "Yes, Please!" comes

   the reply from the dark. "Where are you?" asks the husband. "Over

   here... on the swing!" replies the drunk.

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   Dave Dowden, a legend, a Totty Twin, a pie man! R.I.P.

References

   1. https://go.microsoft.com/fwlink/?LinkId=550986
   2. mailto:j...@boocock.net
   3. mailto:leedslist@gn.apc.org
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Dave Dowden, a legend, a Totty Twin, a pie man! R.I.P.

Re: [LU] From the archives

[John Boocock]

On 31/07/2023 22:47, David Bromley wrote:
The coat will be going on this Sunday to trudge down Lowfields Road 
with all the other masochists



You never know David, the sun might just shine

Good to know you are still out there too!

Betty

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Dave Dowden, a legend, a Totty Twin, a pie man! R.I.P.