[CTRL] Fwd: Offshoring Unskilled Labor

[Kris Millegan]

-Caveat Lector- www.ctrl.org DECLARATION & DISCLAIMER ========== CTRL is a discussion & informational exchange list. Proselytizing propagandic screeds are unwelcomed. Substance—not soap-boxing—please! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory'—with its many half-truths, mis- directions and outright frauds—is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRLgives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply.

Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. ======================================================================== Archives Available at:

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Om

--- Begin Message --- -Caveat Lector- OUTSOURCING ANNOUNCEMENT

by Staff Reporter Melynda Jill

Washington DC -- Congress today announced that the Office of President of the United States will be outsourced to overseas as of June 30, the end of this fiscal year. The
move is being made to save $400K a year in salary, a record $521 Billion in deficit expenditures and related overhead.

"The cost savings will be quite significant" says Congressman Adam
Smith (R-Wash) who, with the aid of Congress research arm, the General
Accounting Office has studied outsourcing of American jobs extensively.
"We simply can no longer afford this level of outlay and remain
competitive on the world stage," Congressman Smith said. Exporting
American jobs has been a popular trend lately, ironically at the urging
of President Bush.

Mr. Bush was informed by email this morning of the termination of his
position. He will receive health coverage, expenses and salary until his
final day of employment. After that, with a two week waiting period, he
will then be eligible for $240 dollars a week from unemployment
insurance for 13 weeks.

Unfortunately he will not be able to receive state Medicaid health
insurance coverage as his unemployment benefits are over the required
limit. "I'm in shock," Mr. Bush stated. "I thought for sure I'd have
some job security around this here place. I have no idea what I'll do
now," he further lamented.

Preparati! ons have been underway for some time for the job move.
Sanji Gurvinder Singh of Indus Teleservices, Mumbai, India, will be
assuming the Office of President of the United States as of July 1. Mr.
Singh was born in the United States while his parents were here on
student visas, thus making him eligible for the position. He will
receive a salary of $320 USD a month but with no health coverage or
other benefits.

Due to the time difference between the US and India, Mr. Singh will be
working primarily at night, when offices of the US Government will be
open. "I am excited to serve in this position," Mr. Singh stated in an
exclusive interview. "Working nights will let me keep my day job at the
American Express call center. I always knew I could be President
someday."

Congress stressed patience when calling Mr. Singh as he may not be
fully aware of all the issues involved with his new position. A
Congressional Spokesperson noted that Mr. Singh has been given a script
tree to follow which will allow him to respond to most topics of
concern. The Spokesperson further noted that "additional savings will be
realized as these scripting tools have already been used previously by
Mr. Bush here in the US. Such scripts will enable Mr. Singh to provide
an answer without having to fully understand the issue itself."

"And so one of the areas where I think the average Russian will realize
that the stereotypes of America have changed is that it's a spirit of
cooperation, not one-upmanship; that we now understand one plus one can
equal three, as opposed to us and Russia we hope to be zero."
-- George W. Bush

www.ctrl.org DECLARATION & DISCLAIMER ========== CTRL is a discussion & informational exchange list. Proselytizing propagandic screeds are unwelcomed. Substance—not soap-boxing—please! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory'—with its many half-truths, mis- directions and outright frauds—is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRLgives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply.

Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. ======================================================================== Archives Available at:

http://www.mail-archive.com/[EMAIL PROTECTED]/ <A HREF="">ctrl</A> ======================================================================== To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED]

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Om

--- Begin Message ---

-Caveat Lector-



www.ctrl.org
DECLARATION & DISCLAIMER
==========
CTRL is a discussion & informational exchange list. Proselytizing propagandic
screeds are unwelcomed. Substance—not soap-boxing—please!   These are
sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory'—with its many half-truths, mis-
directions and outright frauds—is used politically by different groups with
major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought.
That being said, CTRLgives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and
always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no
credence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply.

Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector.
========================================================================
Archives Available at:

http://www.mail-archive.com/[EMAIL PROTECTED]/
<A HREF="http://www.mail-archive.com/[EMAIL PROTECTED]/">ctrl</A>
========================================================================
To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email:
SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED]

To UNsubscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email:
SIGNOFF CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED]

Om

--- Begin Message ---

-Caveat Lector- www.ctrl.org DECLARATION & DISCLAIMER ========== CTRL is a discussion & informational exchange list. Proselytizing propagandic screeds are unwelcomed. Substance—not soap-boxing—please! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory'—with its many half-truths, mis- directions and outright frauds—is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRLgives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply. Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. ======================================================================== Archives Available at: http://www.mail-archive.com/[EMAIL PROTECTED]/ <A HREF="">ctrl</A> ======================================================================== To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] To UNsubscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SIGNOFF CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED] Om

--- Begin Message ---

Title: Message

-Caveat Lector-

 
OUTSOURCING ANNOUNCEMENT
by Staff Reporter Melynda JillWashington D.C. - Congress today
announced that the Office of President of the United States will be
outsourced to overseas as of June 30, the end of this fiscal year. The
move is being made to save $400K a year in salary, a record $521 Billion
in deficit expenditures and related overhead.

"The cost savings will be quite significant" says Congressman Adam
Smith (R-Wash) who, with the aid of Congress research arm, the Gener! al
Accounting Office has studied outsourcing of American jobs extensively.
"We simply can no longer afford this level of outlay and remain
competitive on the world stage," Congressman Smith said. Exporting
American jobs has been a popular trend lately, ironically at the urging
of President Bush.

Mr. Bush was informed by email this morning of the termination of his
position. He will receive health coverage, expenses and salary until his
final day of employment. After that, with a two week waiting period, he
will then be eligible for $240 dollars a week from unemployment
insurance for 13 weeks.

Unfortunately he will not be able to receive state Medicaid health
insurance coverage as his unemployment benefits are over the required
limit. "I'm in shock," Mr. Bush stated. "I thought for sure I'd have
some job security around this here place. I have no idea what I'll do
now," he further lamented.

Preparati! ons have been underway for some time for the job move.
Sanji G urvinder Singh of Indus Teleservices, Mumbai, India, will be
assuming the Office of President of the United States as of July 1. Mr.
Singh was born in the United States while his parents were here on
student visas, thus making him eligible for the position. He will
receive a salary of $320 USD a month but with no health coverage or
other benefits.

Due to the time difference between the US and India, Mr. Singh will be
working primarily at night, when offices of the US Government will be
open. "I am excited to serve in this position," Mr. Singh stated in an
exclusive interview. "Working nights will let me keep my day job at the
American Express call center. I always knew I could be President
someday."

Congress stressed patience when calling Mr. Singh as he may not be
fully aware of all the issues involved with his new position. A
Congressional Spokesperson noted that Mr. Singh has been given a script
tree to f! ollow which will allow him to respond to most topics of
concern. The Spokesperson further noted that "additional savings will be
realized as these scripting tools have already been used previously by
Mr. Bush here in the US. Such scripts will enable Mr. Singh to provide
an answer without having to fully understand the issue itself."--
And so one of the areas where I think the average Russian will realize
that the stereotypes of America have changed is that it's a spirit of
cooperation, not one-upmanship; that we now understand one plus one can
equal three, as opposed to us and Russia we hope to be zero. - George W.
Bush

www.ctrl.org DECLARATION & DISCLAIMER ========== CTRL is a discussion & informational exchange list. Proselytizing propagandic screeds are unwelcomed. Substance—not soap-boxing—please! These are sordid matters and 'conspiracy theory'—with its many half-truths, mis- directions and outright frauds—is used politically by different groups with major and minor effects spread throughout the spectrum of time and thought. That being said, CTRLgives no endorsement to the validity of posts, and always suggests to readers; be wary of what you read. CTRL gives no credence to Holocaust denial and nazi's need not apply.

Let us please be civil and as always, Caveat Lector. ======================================================================== Archives Available at:

http://www.mail-archive.com/[EMAIL PROTECTED]/ <A HREF="">ctrl</A> ======================================================================== To subscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SUBSCRIBE CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED]

To UNsubscribe to Conspiracy Theory Research List[CTRL] send email: SIGNOFF CTRL [to:] [EMAIL PROTECTED]

Om
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