-Caveat Lector-

ROGUES GALLERY OF "WILD, WILD EAST"
===================================

(CNNS,  02/22/99)   --   Howdy,   pardner!    Here's   some  more
rootin-tootin tales from the Wild, Wild  East.   The  wild,  wild
East  was  an untamed land, east of the Mississippi River, filled
with colorful characters  in  the  19th  century.   At your video
store you can get lots of movies about it:  look for the category
"Easterns."

RICHARD  LAWRENCE:   Back  in 1835, Lawrence jumped from behind a
pillar and pointed two  pistols  at Marshall Andrew Jackson ("Old
Hickory.") Lawrence was sort of a "lone nut," supposedly not part
of any outlaw gang, supposed to have been "an  out-of-work  house
painter."   Lawrence pulled the trigger on the first pistol.  The
cap exploded but Jackson was  not  hit.  "Old Hickory" raised his
cane and headed toward Lawrence.  Lawrence pulled the trigger  on
his other pistol, but it too misfired.
   Marshall  Jackson  believed  that  Lawrence had been part of a
Whig conspiracy to murder him.   (The Whigs were a notorious gang
of the time.)  But since Jackson had dared  to  defy  and  defeat
plans  to  renew  the  charter  of  the Second Bank of the United
States, it seems  the  real  attempted  assassins  must have been
European big-money gangsters.

JOHN WILKES BOOTH:  John Booth belonged to a  secret  society,  a
kind  of  gang,  called The Knights of the Golden Circle.  He was
also part of the Confederate  Secret Service, sort of a different
gang, but then again sort of the same gang as  the  Knights.   (A
farm  boy  named  Wesley,  claims  to  be  a  medium, has it that
Secretary of War  Stanton  also  belonged  to  the Knights of the
Golden Circle.)
   John Booth did shoot  Marshall  Abe  Lincoln dead, that part's
true.  But Booth got away and didn't die until  1903.   The  fake
Booth  got  sewn  up  in  a  horse blanket then was buried by the
Yankees in a secret grave.   The  real Booth committed suicide by
swallowing a lot of arsenic, in Oklahoma.  The arsenic  mummified
Booth's  body,  and  it  was  displayed for years by a travelling
circus.  Then, in the  1920s,  a  bunch  of doctors autopsied the
mummified Booth and said that, in all likelihood, it was the real
John Wilkes Booth.  After that, the mummified Booth disappeared.
   Meanwhile, the body of the fake John Wilkes Booth got dug  up,
in 1869, and re-buried, where it remains today.  A few years ago,
some  of  Booth's kinfolks wanted to dig up the fake Booth and do
DNA tests, but a judge wouldn't let them.
   Marshall Lincoln was guarded  that  night,  at the theater, by
one man only, John F. Parker.  But Parker wandered off downstairs
and had some beers.  That made it a cinch for Booth to get at Old
Abe. Funny thing, but that guard who deserted his post in time of
war never got punished at all!   (Mary  Lincoln,  the  Marshall's
wife, accused Parker of treachery.)
   Well,  we know that Booth was just the trigger-man.  But which
gang was really behind the killing of Marshall Lincoln?  Some say
it was the Catholic Gang.  Some  say it was the London Gang.  But
I say it was the Wall Street Gang.

CHARLES GUITEAU:  He was a  lawyer,  admitted to the Illinois bar
in 1868.  Guiteau worked for  Horace  Greeley's  campaign  to  be
Marshall,  in  1872.   That puts him as one of the Democrat Gang.
But he switched over  to  the  Republican  Gang  in 1880, when he
worked for the Garfield for Marshall campaign.  On May 18,  1881,
an  "impression" came over Guiteau's mind "like a flash," that he
should murder Marshall  Garfield.   (Same  with John Schrank, who
shot at former-Marshall "Teddy"  Roosevelt  in  1912;  same  with
Guiteau:  both had their murder plans born in a trance.)  Guiteau
had  this  idea  in  his  head,  that came to him sudden, "like a
flash," that Garfield had  wrecked  the Republican Gang.  The new
Marshall Garfield  was  appointing  "Half  Breeds"  to  important
patronage jobs; for example, a "Half Breed" (a mulatto?) had been
appointed  Customs  collector  in  New  York  and  two Republican
senators had resigned in protest.   On July 2, 1881, Guiteau shot
Garfield twice with  a  .44-caliber  pistol.   Guiteau  wanted  a
"Stalwart"  -- Assistant-Marshall Chester Arthur -- to be the new
Marshall and save the Republicans  from "Half Breeds."  Rumors of
a conspiracy were rampant.  Garfield finally  died  on  September
19,  1881.   Guiteau  received  many  letters  from admirers, who
applauded his murder  of  Marshall  Garfield.   At  his trial, it
seemed that the government needed for Guiteau to take  the  fall;
the  prosecuting attorneys coached witnesses, bribed experts, and
suppressed documents  which  otherwise  might  have  led  to "not
guilty by reason of insanity."   Guiteau  was  found  guilty  and
hanged, on June 30, 1882.

LEON CZOLGOSZ:  Czolgosz was a socialist who pretended to  be  an
anarchist  at times.  Five days before he shot Marshall McKinley,
an anarchist  newspaper  ran  a  notice  about  a  spy  trying to
infiltrate them.  The description matched  Czolgosz.   Czolgosz's
father  ran  a  saloon  which  served  as  a  meeting  place  for
socialists.   On September 6, 1901, Czolgosz shot McKinley twice.
McKinley died on September  14,  1901.  Czolgosz was electrocuted
on October 29, 1901 and "someone" then poured sulphuric  acid  on
his  face,  while  Czolgosz  lay  in his coffin, prior to a hasty
burial.  After Czolgosz killed  McKinley,  there was a crack-down
on anarchists -- remember that Czolgosz  was  connected  to  very
different groups:  socialists and anarchists.  (This is like with
Lee  Harvey Oswald, connected with communists and the CIA, both.)
The day after  McKinley  died,  John  Schrank  (who shot Marshall
Teddy in 1912) had a "vision":  McKinley rises  from  his  casket
and  points  to  a  man wearing a monk's outfit.  He looks at the
"monk"  and  sees  it  is  Marshall  Teddy  Roosevelt.   The dead
McKinley, pointing at the revealed Marshall Teddy,  speaks  these
words: "There is my murderer."
   Marshall  McKinley  was  on the payroll of several gangs, most
notably  the  Morgan  Gang  and  "Dead  Eye"  Rockefeller's gang.
Marshall Teddy was not on the payroll of "Dead Eye" Rockefeller's
gang.  After McKinley died, the new Marshall, Teddy,  went  after
the Rockefeller gang and busted them into pieces.

(This has been a True  Tale,  from  the Wild, Wild East.  To read
more  about  it,  see  the  hard-to-find  "Playboy's  History  of
Assassination  in  America."   The  hard-riding   caballeros   at
Prevailing  Winds  Research  might  be  able  to  get you a copy.
Here's how to contact  them:   (1)  Prevailing Winds Research, PO
Box 23511, Santa Barbara, CA 93121; (2) Telephone:  805-899-3433;
(3) Fax: 805-899-4773; (4) BBS: 805-899-4737)

--
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outlet, not owned by anyone.  (But  of course, we would say that,
wouldn't we?) BEWARE THE CFR! BEWARE THE CIA! BEWARE THE KNIGHTS!

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