Friend, my only wish in life before I die from a lethal injection is never to go to Alliston in Ontario. Even when I am 99.
Edgar Martins
A seasoned traveller sitting in the aisle seat in a plane waiting to take off became aware that the couple in the seats beside him probably hadn't travelled by air before. He decided to engage them in conversation to ease their stress.
"Is this your first time to fly?" he asked.
The husband, who was beside him, answered "Yes, we've never flown before."
The wife, in the window seat and slightly deaf asked "What did he say, what did he say?"
"O, he just asked if we had ever flown before and I told him it was our first time." "What's the occasion?" asked the traveller.
"We won a holiday to Jamaica in a contest and that's why we're here" said the husband.
The wife again: "What did he say, what did he say?"
"He asked me what the occasion was and I told him about us winning the contest" answered the husband.
"Where are you from?" enquired the traveller. "O, we're from Alliston Ontario" replied the husband.
The wife again: "What did he say, what did he say?"
"He asked where we were from and I told him" said the husband.
"Jaysus" said the traveller, "I was only in Alliston once in my life, I was there for one night. And you'll never guess but I got lucky. Trouble it was the worst sex I ever had. It was atrocious, it was appalingly bad, I can't find words to tell you how awful it was.
The wife again: "What did he say, what did he say?
"Oh," said the husband "he says he thinks he knows you".
