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The Rape of Goa - A photo documentary by Rajan P. Parrikar Venue: Menezes Braganza Art Gallery, Panjim, May 21-24, 2008 http://www.parrikar.org/misc/doc-notice.pdf --------------------------------------------------------------------------- The tenure of President Pandurang Fernandes is coming to an end when this year becomes over. During his manure President has singlehandedly, with his left hand, made Chimbel a better toilet than before. Before, the dukors were behind the toilet. Now they are in the government. All problems in our walled and fortified independent republic have been solved by the PresidentÂ’s brilliant policy of fighting many wars at the same time against the tourorists, and torturing those who are with them inside. Those who are with us are patriots. Patriots will never forget that all problems are only because of tourorists and migrants. Those who forget this are with the tourorists. The war with Bittona is fighting because of problems with tourorists from Agacaim. The war with Sirdona is because of trouble making by insurgeons from Marcel. But now there is a new danger that has appeared on the horizon. It looks like a mushroom cloud in the sky. It is the difficult problem of preserving our identity. Our identity is the common thread that we share in all the vadde. It is the same thread that Loximon and Forsu use to tie their kashti everyday. But it is too thin to be seen in any of the photos on the internet, or even in the raping scene photo exhibition to be held in Panjim, which will display many ministers and builders with their pants down and their wet kashti showing. President Pandurang will leave this identity problem to the next president because of his special expertise in identifying everybody who is with the tourorists with both his hands tied behind his back. This next president who is running fast for the election is a migrant from Jabalpur. He entered just before the dureeg around IRC was completed. His name is Mario Hussein Govinda. He has purchased a 150 square centimetre flat in Indira Nagar for Rs. 75 lakhs. It was very legal because he first became citizen by buying the IRC passport in the Mapusa bazaar on the way, and because he gave the customary 10% for eating purposes to the minister in charge of selling flats. We are confident that Mario Hussein Govinda will be erected President by the Supreme Court using democratic means because Demoo is still the LDC who takes out the circular. The President-Erect will have an effective copitalist policy to preserve the identity. He will print as many identity cards as necessary and laminate them. Laminated identity preserves better even when it gets wet sometimes because of our spiritualist and copitalist tradition in both upper and lower tavernas of our bicameral government. We have an expert camera man with at least 6 month practice to take the identity photos. The President-Erect will then pass zonning laws which were invented by him on Goanet. Anybody who builds new construction will be subjected to strict zonning. That is he will have to give a zonn every year to the President-Erect and all the ministers under his cabinet, in addition to the 10% for eating purposes. This is how he will make Chimbel the best toilet in the world. Toilet of the foss and everything! Press Release from The Dhovi Khopti Independent Republic of Chimbel