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> prepare to be amazed at theseThe latest Darwin Awards update.... > The Darwin Awards, for those not familiar, are for those individuals who > contribute to the survival of the fittest by eliminating themselves from the > gene pool before they have a chance to breed. > 1. A young Canadian man, searching for a way of getting drunk cheaply, > because he had no money with which to buy alcohol, mixed gasoline with > milk. Not surprisingly, this concoction made him ill, and he vomited into > the fireplace in his house. This resulting explosion and fire burned his > house down, killing both him and his sister. > 2. A 34-year-old white male found dead in the basement of his home died of > suffocation, according to police. He was approximately 6'2" tall and weighed > 225 pounds. He was wearing a pleated skirt, white bra, black and white > saddle shoes, and a woman's wig. It appeared that he was trying to create a > schoolgirl's uniform look. He was also wearing a military gas mask that had > the filter canister removed and a rubber hose attached in its place. The > other end of the hose was connected to a one end of a hollow wooden tube > approx. 12" long and 3" in diameter. The tube's other end was inserted into > his rear end for reasons unknown, and was the cause of his suffocation. > Police found the task of explaining the circumstances of his death to his > family very awkward. > > > 3. Three Brazilian men were flying in a light aircraft at low altitude > when another plane approached. It appears that they decided to moon the > > occupants of the other plane, but lost control of their own aircraft and > > crashed. They were all found dead in the wreckage with their pants around > > their ankles. > > > 4. A police officer in Ohio responded to a 911 call. She had no details > before arriving, except that someone had reported that his father was not > breathing. Upon arrival, the officer found the man face down on the couch, > naked. When she rolled him over to check for a pulse and to start CPR, she > noticed burn marks around his genitals. After the ambulance arrived and > removed the man - who was declared dead on arrival at the hospital - the > police made a closer inspection of the couch, and noticed that the man had > made a hole between the cushions. Upon flipping the couch over, they > discovered what caused his death. Apparently the man had a habit of putting > his penis between the cushions, down into the hole and between two > > electrical sanders (with the sandpaper removed, for obvious > reasons).According to the story, after his orgasm the discharge shorted out > one of the sanders, electrocuting him. > 5. A 27-year-old French woman lost control of her car on a highway near > Marseilles and crashed into a tree, seriously injuring her passenger and > killing herself. As a commonplace road accident, this would not have > qualified for a Darwin nomination, were it not for the fact that the > driver's attention had been distracted by her Tamagotchi key ring, which > > had started urgently beeping for food as she drove along. In an attempt to > > press the correct buttons to save the Tamagotchi's life, the woman lost her > own. > > > 6. A 22-year-old Reston, VA man was found dead after he tried to > useoctopus straps to bungee jump off a 70-foot railroad trestle. Fairfax > > County police said Eric Barcia, a fast-food worker, taped a bunch of these > > straps together, wrapped an end around one foot, anchored the other end to > the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, jumped and hit the pavement. Warren > Carmichael, a police spokesman, said investigators think Barcia was > alonebecause his car was found nearby. "The length of the cord that he had > assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the > ground", Carmichael said. Police say the apparent cause of death was "Major > trauma". > 7. A man in Alabama died from rattlesnake bites. It seems that he and a > friend were playing a game of catch, using the rattlesnake as a ball. > Thefriend -no doubt, a future Darwin Awards candidate - was hospitalised. > 8. Employees in a medium-sized warehouse in west Texas noticed the smell > of a gas leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the building, extinguishing > all potential sources of ignition lights, power, etc. After the building had > been evacuated, two technicians from the gas company were dispatched. Upon > entering the building, they found they had difficulty navigating in the > dark. To their frustration, none of the lights worked (you can see what's > coming, can't you?). Witnesses later described the sight of one of the > technicians reaching into his pocket and retrieving an object, that > resembled a cigarette lighter. Upon operation of the lighter-like object, > the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending pieces of it up to three miles > away. Nothing was found of the technicians, but the lighter was virtually > untouched by the explosion. The technician suspected of causing the blast > had never been thought of as 'bright' by his peers. > > _________________________________________________________________________ > Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com. |
