On Bob Hope

 May 29, 1903 - July 27, 2003

 ON TURNING 70  "You still chase women, but only downhill".

 ON TURNING 80  "That's the time of your life when even your birthday
suit needs pressing."

 ON TURNING 90  "You know you're getting old when the candles cost more
than the cake."

 ON TURNING 100  " I don't feel old. In fact I don't feel anything until
noon. Then it's time for my nap."

 ON GIVING UP HIS EARLY CAREER, BOXING  "I ruined my hands in the ring
... the referee kept stepping on them."

 ON SAILORS  "They spend the first six days of each week sowing their
wild oats, then they go to church on Sunday and pray for crop failure."

 ON NEVER WINNING AN OSCAR  "Welcome to the Academy Awards or, as it's
called at my home, 'Passover'."

 ON GOLF  "Golf is my profession. Show business is just to pay the green
fees."

 ON PRESIDENTS  " I have performed for 12 presidents and entertained
only six."

 ON WHY HE CHOSE SHOWBIZ FOR HIS CAREER  " When I was born, the doctor
said to my mother, 'Congratulations, you have an  eight-pound ham'."

 ON RECEIVING THE CONGRESSIONAL GOLD MEDAL   "I feel very
 humble, but I think I have the strength of character to fight it."

 ON HIS FAMILY'S EARLY POVERTY  "Four of us slept in the one bed. When
it got cold, mother threw on another brother."

 ON HIS SIX BROTHERS  "That's how I learned to dance. Waiting for the
bathroom."

 ON HIS EARLY FAILURES  " I would not have had anything to eat if it
wasn't for the stuff the audience threw at me."

 ON GOING TO HEAVEN  "I've done benefits for ALL religions.  I'd hate to
blow the hereafter on a technicality


____________________________________________________

To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line:
unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to
[EMAIL PROTECTED]

Reply via email to