May "I" Be Of Benefit
By Waylon H. Lewis, Dec 19, 2006
Boulder, CO (USA) -- I'm a "Dharma Brat," the nickname (said to be a mishmash 
of "Army Brat" and Kerouac's "Dharma Bums") for the first generation of 
American Buddhists to grow up from the get-go with the terrible technological 
brilliance of the West and the esoteric wisdom of the East.

<< Look! This is your world. You can't not look. There is no other world. This 
is your world: it is your feast. Look at the greatness of the whole thing. 
Look! Don't hesitate-look! Open your eyes. Don't blink, and look, look - look 
further. ~ Chögyam Trungpa, Rinpoche

When you grow up Buddhist, you notice that everyone's always sitting around. 
They call it meditating. As a child, I remember wanting to yell at a 
building-full of meditators at Karme Chöling, in Vermont, "What are you afraid 
of! It's a gorgeous day! Get out there and live!" Only later did I realize what 
hard work it was. Working with your mind. Becoming friends with oneself. Seeing 
through the incessant blah bla blah that speeds by so fast that, like a 
spinning tire, it looks solid. We look solid, that is: we think we exist. From 
there comes the urge to preserve and protect. From there comes the us vs. them 
mentality. From there comes ego, which is something I know all about.

But if I didn't holler at them there Buddhists, they sure did at me. When 
you're a child living at a Buddhist retreat center in the middle of nowhere 
(the exact middle: Barnet, Vermont), what happens is you get told to shush a 
lot. I was a just a kid. I ran and jumped instead of walking and laughed and 
yelled instead of talking. That didn't go over so well with the meditation 
crowd.

Now I'm an old man of 32. I'm an adult, mostly. Folks don't tell me to shush, 
anymore. They do, from time to time, suggest I put fewer photos of myself in my 
own magazine. I shrug, helplessly. I'm hopeless. For better and worse, I yam 
who I yam and I ain't who I ain't. And one thing I ain't is someone quiet, or 
shy. I'm all about me. Not very Buddhist, I know.

And that's where, as a young man, Buddhism hit home. Because Buddhism 
says...well, first of all, Buddhism says "don't believe anything Buddhism says 
unless you can personally experience it and find it to be true." And secondly, 
Buddhism says, "You're nobody. I'm nobody. I don't exist." Then, in the Heart 
Sutra (the most beautiful, rhythmic sutra I know) Buddhism goes on to say that 
"though I don't exist (form is empty,) I also am myself (emptiness is form)-and 
that's not only okay, that's great." It's great because only through my own 
personal experience of our world and my life, can I develop compassion for 
others. And for myself. Finally, it says the thing that gave my life direction: 
"Be a 'bodhisattva.'" Use my understanding of my lack of self-my awareness of 
my self-involved self, my compassion for my insufferable self-and then and only 
then go out and help others. Save the world. Change the world. Be an example. 
Be a good person. Live a good life, yes-but live a life that's not only good 
for myself and my loved ones, but for everyone, and the world.

'Cause lots of Americans live the conventional idea of a good life: go to 
school, join a frat, get a job, work hard, make money, buy a big home with a 
big garage to put my big car in, and retire rich but dissatisfied. And lots of 
others live a life that's good for others: go to school, join the co-op, become 
a teacher, change children's' lives and work day and night every day of the 
week for a few decades, and retire poor. But not enough people do both: live a 
good life that also happens to be good for others. Get rich doing something you 
love that the world actually needs. Make your mission in life about service.

And that's not merely a Buddhist idea. You'll find that in just about any 
religion and culture worth its salt.

And that's what "the mindful life" is meant to be all about. And that's what I 
aim to do with my life. I want to get rich doing whatever I happen to be good 
at, so long as what I do is good for others and the world. I want to get famous 
and spread the word. May my every action be of benefit to all sentient beings, 
as the twice-daily Buddhist aspiration goes. In Buddhism, someone who's 
enlightened is called a Tathagata-literally, one who's crossed the river. But 
it's better to be a Sugata-one who's crossed the river and enjoyed doing so. No 
kidding. So enjoy your life. And the best way to do so is to help a world in 
need. Be eco in your everyday habits. Practice meditation, just a little bit. 
Align your career, your passion and your skills.

Speaking personally, it's a fulfilled life, if not always an easy one. I work 
all the time. Just a few years back, I had a reputation for being a wild 
n'crazy guy. Now, I spend quality time with my laptop. My idea of a good time 
is to quit work at 11, watch a West Wing, and sleep. But I'm not playing a 
teeny-weensy violin. I'm fortunate. I know what I want to do with my life. I 
want to be of benefit.



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