Hey, great article, Kirby. I missed it yesterday.
** When Larry David writes this, you know 99 percent of it is how he really
thinks. After all, this is the co-creator of "Seinfeld" -- who was honored
by the Gay & Lesbian Association Against Defamation (GLAAD) -- for
co-writing the famous (and hilarious) gay-themed "not that there's anything
wrong with it" episode. The gay community loves him and there was an
episode in "Curb Your Enthusiasm" this season illustrating what Larry David
thinks would happen to him if the gay community saw him congratulating one
of their own for turning straight -- despite its impossibility, in that a
person doesn't CHOOSE to be gay, it's inherited. (Of course he's turned
into a pariah in the episode, then redeemed again at the end, but by
accident.)
** I haven't seen Brokeback Mountain, and it's playing on 4 out of 5 screens
at a single Landmark theater located in the heart of San Diego's gay
community, which is Hillcrest, north of downtown. The release is very
limited, the per-screen average is high, but for success, it requires
recommendations from straight friends to get straight people (esp. straight
men) to see male frontal nudity, two men passionately kissing or having sex
(however discreet) w/each other. Heck, I'm a big fan of early Woody Allen.
He's straight, but it's no fun watching him kiss ANY woman. So I'm not wild
watching two men kissing, an unrequited gay romance -- maybe for the same
reason some gay people aren't interested watching an unrequited romance
w/two straight people slobbering all over each other.
** But it's a moot point. I HAVE to see it. I'm 100% sure Brokeback is
going to score a nomination on Jan. 31 for Best Picture. I can't break my
track record of seeing every film since 1964 that's ever been nominated for
Best Picture or Best Director -- BEFORE awards night. It won't make $100
mil. And don't expect a slew of gay-themed pictures marketed to mainstream
America after this. The ads in big city papers are painful, they go out of
their way to note high praise received from midwestern critics. That's not
gonna work. The film's true success depends on people getting past their
"preferences" and "prejudices" -- to see a film they don't wanna spend
$10-to-10.75 to see. Even in NYC, there's resistance.
** Some films addressing gay, transgender, transsexual issues as dominant
themes -- may garner critical praise (Boys Don't Cry, Monster), but are
never commercial outside big cities. But if you're a film nut, a high
caliber director like Ang Lee demands your attention. So in truth, if
Brokeback had been directed by an "unknown," I would've ignored it. I can't
now.
-koose!
----Original Message Follows----
From: Kirby McDaniel <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Reply-To: Kirby McDaniel <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: MoPo-L@LISTSERV.AMERICAN.EDU
Subject: Cowboys are my Weakness
Date: Mon, 2 Jan 2006 15:12:10 -0600
From Jan 1, NY TIMES.
Kirby McDaniel
www.movieart.net
Cowboys Are My Weakness
By LARRY DAVID
SOMEBODY had to write this, and it might as well be me. I haven't seen
"Brokeback Mountain," nor do I have any intention of seeing it. In fact,
cowboys would have to lasso me, drag me into the theater and tie me to the
seat, and even then I would make every effort to close my eyes and cover my
ears.
And I love gay people. Hey, I've got gay acquaintances. Good acquaintances,
who know they can call me anytime if they had my phone number. I'm for gay
marriage, gay divorce, gay this and gay that. I just don't want to watch two
straight men, alone on the prairie, fall in love and kiss and hug and hold
hands and whatnot. That's all.
Is that so terrible? Does that mean I'm homophobic? And if I am, well, then
that's too bad. Because you can call me any name you want, but I'm still not
going to that movie.
To my surprise, I have some straight friends who've not only seen the movie
but liked it. "One of the best love stories ever," one gushed. Another went
on, "Oh, my God, you completely forget that it's two men. You in particular
will love it."
"Why me?"
"You just will, trust me."
But I don't trust him. If two cowboys, male icons who are 100 percent
all-man, can succumb, what chance to do I have, half- to a quarter of a man,
depending on whom I'm with at the time? I'm a very susceptible person,
easily influenced, a natural-born follower with no sales-resistance. When I
walk into a store, clerks wrestle one another trying to get to me first. My
wife won't let me watch infomercials because of all the junk I've ordered
that's now piled up in the garage. My medicine cabinet is filled with
vitamins and bald cures.
So who's to say I won't become enamored with the whole gay business? Let's
face it, there is some appeal there. I know I've always gotten along great
with men. I never once paced in my room rehearsing what to say before asking
a guy if he wanted to go to the movies. And I generally don't pay for men,
which of course is their most appealing attribute.
And gay guys always seem like they're having a great time. At the Christmas
party I went to, they were the only ones who sang. Boy that looked like fun.
I would love to sing, but this weighty, self-
conscious heterosexuality I'm saddled with won't permit it.
I just know if I saw that movie, the voice inside my head that delights in
torturing me would have a field day. "You like those cowboys, don't you?
They're kind of cute. Go ahead, admit it, they're
cute. You can't fool me, gay man. Go ahead, stop fighting it. You're gay!
You're gay!"
Not that there's anything wrong with it.
Larry David appears in the HBO series "Curb Your Enthusiasm."
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