Drug Dealer Settles With Spritzer By Bon Whate Warshington Pist Stuff Writer
NEW YORK, May 21--Notorious drug dealer Joe Scumbag has reached an agreement with New York Attorney General Eliot Spritzer that requires the him to pay a $100 million fine and express contrition for the behavior of his gang of thugs and more formally separate his organization's cocaine synthesizers and enforcers. After weeks of sometimes slow and painful negotiations, the two sides struck the deal at 2:15 this morning that allows Scumbag to avoid civil or criminal charges. Details of the agreement will be announced at a news conference in lower Manhattan today. ... Bill
